So the always funny blogger and super cool chick Whiskey Marie sent me a personal letter a few weeks ago and I thought I'd share the envelope with you before I donate it to the Smithsonian.
She knows me well. I live in PA. I wear underwear sometimes. I enjoy laughing at people that put things in their noses. And I hate canned and bottled beets with everything in my soul. I'm betting that the beet image was a joke.
What would you mail me if you were lucky enough to have my address?
Probably my children, if we're being hypothetical seeing as how I don't have any.
ReplyDeleteI'd imagine them to be ungrateful little brats.
I could send you that picture, framed.
ReplyDeleteI'd mail you a shitty prize!!!
ReplyDeleteMaybe a slinky, package of Sea Monkeys or an egg of Silly Putty!
- Jennifer
i've tagged you on my blog.
ReplyDeleteI would send you a bottle of your favorite booze and/or 6 pack of beer and a pizza
ReplyDeleteSand fleas…you guys done have enough sand fleas.
ReplyDeleteOOOOO or maybe some chiggers!
ReplyDeleteWell I had planned on mailing you the other half of the BFF necklace I purchased on eBay last week - but after your contest yesterday I don't know where I stand :(
ReplyDeleteCream Ale. And an adult diaper, to avoid the necessary multiple bathroom trips after drinking it.
ReplyDeleteif im lucky enough to ever mail you my address, then i am going to mail you my actual underwear...
ReplyDeleteI'd send you:
ReplyDeletepub coasters from the local pub.
a twig.
a blue smartie I put up my nose once.... cleaned of course and in a baggie.
a toy from those twoonie bins at wal mart
a rock
a pillowcase
one glove (because two is just too useful)
and a vile of snow.... which would magically turned to water when it arrived on your doorstep.
oh and a picture of the wallabe you saved.
The head of Alfredo Garcia. And some skittles.
ReplyDeleteHey D......NEWS FLASH
ReplyDeleteYou CAN FOLLOW your own Blog....
Right up your alley!!
Now once you follow yourself, you'll have 66 followers!!
You can thank me in the morning!!!
:)
- Jennifer
A hug.
ReplyDelete(awww)
Jennifer thanks. I'm now a follower and a leader. Kind of like Jesus. Wait. Was he also a follower?
ReplyDeletesure, id send you a holiday postcard from Thailand...which is a bit weird since I live her
ReplyDeleteA box of finger condoms, KY jelly and an instruction manual.
ReplyDeleteH - are the instructions more complicated than: Stick finger in KY then stick finger in ass? If so, please send instructions.
ReplyDeleteIf B.V.D. Knit Brevs were on sale for 85 cents, I'd mail you $6.80 worth.
ReplyDeleteEnough for a week, and then some.
I'm totally mailing you a can of beets now.
ReplyDeleteFine.
How about canned bees? Any opinion on those? Or, canned meats?
Canned teats?
Canned feets?
Canned heats?
O.k, I'll stop now.
Canned treats?
ReplyDeleteCanned defeats?
I CAN'T STOP!!!!!
Myself, so I could say hi in person.
ReplyDeleteDid the boobs just out themselves?
ReplyDeleteI'd probably send you one of those Shoebox greeting cards. The ones with the old lady on the front who's always complaining about getting old and sagging body parts and stuff. Those are always good for a chuckle.
ReplyDeleteMy undying devotion. And maybe a case of herpes...
ReplyDeleteI'd send you a midget.
ReplyDeleteZibbs - it's a picture book. Lots of ideas. Finger condoms are just for butts ya know. Jeez.
ReplyDeleteOops...make that "finger condoms AREN'T just for butts ya know". And JEEZ!
ReplyDeleteI would sent you a picture of my boobs.
ReplyDelete#1
I would send you a Whooppee cushion for all of those nights alone at the computer.
ReplyDeleteA half eaten bag of candy corn.
And a picture of my old ass.
peace
#2
an autographed pic
ReplyDeleteof the oak ridge boys
and a few sweet & low packets
and one stick of gum
.. probably Big red
The certificate they send you when you name a star after someone. 'Cause I would totally name a star after you.
ReplyDeleteWell...as soon as my donation cup gets full enough.
:-)
That's for me to know and you to find out.
ReplyDeleteI'd send you a porn DVD featuring farm animals and a chesty blond. However, it wouldn't take you long before you realized the horse keeps getting rotated in all the scenes. They paint him so he looks different. Not only that, the horse has a real attitude. Disappointed, you would respond by sending me a pipe bomb disguised as a 7" vibrator set to go off upon insertion.
ReplyDeleteGOD! Can't believe I posted that!!!
ReplyDeleteNow that's a horse of a different color.
ReplyDeleteMaybe a Jesus pencil topper.
ReplyDelete