Sunday, April 12, 2009

Happy Easter. WCHE 1520. Gigantic Monster Jesus.


Number one - stay calm. If my calculations are correct, the real Jesus will rise from the dead today at 3:00. He will have grown to 100 feet tall.

And he's pissed.

I'm urging all citizens to gather as many eggs as they can. When the gigantic Jesus approaches you, throw the eggs directly at his heart. You've got to trust me on this.

I will be releasing a message to all survivors via the West Chester radio station WCHE 1520 AM in a few days with a plan for rebuilding.

Good luck.
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24 comments:

  1. Dr ZibbsApril 12, 2009 at 11:09:00 AM EDT

    And if any of you are lucky enough to get on TV while being attacked, please promote my blog by yelling out, "GOOGLE THIS: THAT BLUE YAK".

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dr ZibbsApril 12, 2009 at 11:11:00 AM EDT

    And since you have a few hours until Giant Jesus arrives, please vote for me on at the Bloggers Choice awards.

    Click on icon on my sidebar to get there.

    ReplyDelete
  3. sista #2April 12, 2009 at 1:59:00 PM EDT

    Throwing eggs at Jesus is like having sex in church.....ya just don't do it.


    Happy Easter!!

    peace
    #2

    ReplyDelete
  4. MichelleApril 12, 2009 at 4:06:00 PM EDT

    Well it's 4.06, I guess I missed all the excitement. I was on the toilet!!!

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  5. shrink on the couchApril 12, 2009 at 4:22:00 PM EDT

    Which is why I prefer to worship the Jesus in the grilled cheese. If he gets out of hand, I can just eat him.

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  6. Girl InterruptedApril 12, 2009 at 5:33:00 PM EDT

    You're so going to hell.

    See you there!

    Ps: Bring pie

    ReplyDelete
  7. dianeApril 12, 2009 at 6:03:00 PM EDT

    I love the way your mind works. I can always count on you for something completely different.
    Hope you had a nice Easter. xo

    ReplyDelete
  8. Dr ZibbsApril 12, 2009 at 6:45:00 PM EDT

    Girl I - Your comment are t-shirt worthy. Bring Pie. Classic.

    Diane - Thanks. I strive to bring joy to all. Expecially on one of the holy days.

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  9. Caffeine CourtApril 12, 2009 at 7:37:00 PM EDT

    We used to listen to WCHE for school closings..I didn't realize they did monster Jesus attack warnings too!!

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  10. Fancy SchmancyApril 12, 2009 at 8:57:00 PM EDT

    What are the rest of us supposed to do?

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  11. Dr ZibbsApril 12, 2009 at 9:01:00 PM EDT

    Fancy - pray.

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  12. JeannieApril 12, 2009 at 9:24:00 PM EDT

    I wanna be tax collector ok? and I get to charge a commission.

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  13. KimberlyApril 12, 2009 at 10:06:00 PM EDT

    He's already huge. He totally be ya to the punch.

    Happy Easter!

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  14. CameronApril 12, 2009 at 10:37:00 PM EDT

    Holy shit, I missed the whole deal. Zibbsy, if you're alive, give us a sign.

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  15. Dr ZibbsApril 13, 2009 at 8:11:00 AM EDT

    Cameron - I'm safe in my bunker.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Soda and CandyApril 13, 2009 at 10:04:00 AM EDT

    Absolute gold Zibbs.

    Happy Easter!

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  17. AnonymousApril 13, 2009 at 11:07:00 AM EDT

    Whew, I made it through the weekend without running into the big guy. Thanks for the warning!

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  18. KellyApril 13, 2009 at 11:12:00 AM EDT

    Dude, if Jesus is 100 feet tall I am not throwing shit! I will be his bitch! Completely!

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  19. Dr ZibbsApril 13, 2009 at 11:19:00 AM EDT

    Dedene - it's all part of the service I supply.

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  20. GwenApril 13, 2009 at 12:16:00 PM EDT

    All clear in Missouri.

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  21. CoraApril 13, 2009 at 3:26:00 PM EDT

    Egging Jesus, huh? Well, okay, since it's doctor's orders and all.

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  22. Dr ZibbsApril 13, 2009 at 7:19:00 PM EDT

    Cora - it's the Gigantic Monster Jesus.

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  23. Steam Me Up, KidApril 13, 2009 at 8:28:00 PM EDT

    Christ, that's like a Jesus tsunami.

    ReplyDelete
  24. J. HiApril 16, 2009 at 10:37:00 AM EDT

    HA! You make me laugh.

    ReplyDelete