Saturday, May 16, 2009

Chester County Hospital 2009 May Festival And Special Shoes.

I thought today was the Chester County Hospital May Festival but it's actually May 26. Which is perfect. Because I was thinking about going there, getting in the moon bounce and then putting on these:



They're aerator shoes.

Then as the deflation of the giant moon bounce begins the screams of joy will turn to screams of horror. Parents will frantically pull through the folds of the still flapping rubber looking for their children.

Someone will drop to their knees and scream, "Why??"

Just as the last child is pulled from the wreckage I will emerge from what's left of the moon bounce wearing my fancy ass aerator shoes. Everyone will look at me with confusion and anger at which point I'll get all pissed and innocently say,

"WHAT????....(looking around) WHAT?? I thought that....Oh forget it!"

Then I'll stomp away all pissed off.
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28 comments:

  1. sybil lawMay 16, 2009 at 10:40:00 AM EDT

    That is freaking awesome!!!
    Hahahaha
    :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. Suburbia StephMay 16, 2009 at 10:53:00 AM EDT

    Could I borrow them when you're done permanently scarring children for life? I have some people I'd like to kick in the face with those.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dr ZibbsMay 16, 2009 at 10:59:00 AM EDT

    Sybil Law - thanks and welcome to TBY

    Steph - not only will I give them to you but since I like you so much I'll have them converted into pumps.

    ReplyDelete
  4. HelpMakeCentsMay 16, 2009 at 11:01:00 AM EDT

    Make sure to also wear dark clothing and a ski mask. That way, they'll NEVER see it coming. No, sir.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dr ZibbsMay 16, 2009 at 11:06:00 AM EDT

    HelpMakesCents - I was thinking of disquising myself as a clown.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Dr ZibbsMay 16, 2009 at 11:06:00 AM EDT

    ....a clown named Bubbles.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Suburbia StephMay 16, 2009 at 11:18:00 AM EDT

    Gee, thanks!

    Holy shit, a clown! You'll have those kids slitting their wrists!

    ReplyDelete
  8. CoraMay 16, 2009 at 11:58:00 AM EDT

    Hey! My kid actually was in one of those things when it collapsed a few years ago. It was one of the huge ones with a slide and everything. Was that YOU?!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Some GuyMay 16, 2009 at 12:22:00 PM EDT

    Could you imagine if we combined our annoying forces? We could rule the world! Or at least annoy the hell out of a lot of people.

    ReplyDelete
  10. KatMay 16, 2009 at 12:27:00 PM EDT

    Oh I can just imagine the angry villagers on your lawn with torches and pitchforks now...

    ReplyDelete
  11. The JulesMay 16, 2009 at 12:28:00 PM EDT

    I thought they were massage shoes for walking on fakirs.

    ReplyDelete
  12. ChrisMay 16, 2009 at 12:54:00 PM EDT

    Just carry a camera with you and say you're the Pop-arazzi.

    Jeez, I crack myself up.

    You could probably cover the whole birthday party circuit over a long weekend.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Dr ZibbsMay 16, 2009 at 1:06:00 PM EDT

    Some Guy - I'll draw up a business plan.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Mr. CondescendingMay 16, 2009 at 1:27:00 PM EDT

    Zibbs that's mean! And incredibly fun sounding!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Shelle-BlokThoughtsMay 16, 2009 at 1:55:00 PM EDT

    LOL--that would be funny... unless of course I was there, then I would be pissed and probably drop kick you from ruining my children's entertainment while I laze around doing nothing!

    K if you are a clown you're going to scare not only the kids but the adults... Clowns freak me out cause my sister watched IT by Stephen King when i was 8 or 9...

    Ruined watching re runs of that game show BOzO the clown... and I LOVED that show...

    sigh

    will you get it on video??? :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Shelle-BlokThoughtsMay 16, 2009 at 1:57:00 PM EDT

    And no worries... you TOTALLY top me with comments... so you ARE officially a comment WHORE! :)

    ReplyDelete
  17. PeggyMay 16, 2009 at 2:01:00 PM EDT

    I would kill to see that! I would just love to crack a beer sit on a bench nearby and watch it all go down.

    A girl can dream right?

    ReplyDelete
  18. SamsmamaMay 16, 2009 at 2:14:00 PM EDT

    Peggy, I'll be waiting on the bench for you.

    But for the sake of drama, I will drop to my knees and yell,

    "Won't somebody PLEASE think of the children?"

    ReplyDelete
  19. Dr ZibbsMay 16, 2009 at 2:15:00 PM EDT

    Shelle-Blok - thanks for BOTH comments.

    Peggy - If I don't have plans that day I'll do it at two sharp. So get your plane tickets now.

    ReplyDelete
  20. jessica oMay 16, 2009 at 5:42:00 PM EDT

    Dr. Zibbs, I think it's important to wear appropriate shoes for every occasion. I applaud your choice. These shoes are perfect for bounce house parties, walking on eggshells and taking traditional Japanese tea.

    ReplyDelete
  21. TomMay 16, 2009 at 7:08:00 PM EDT

    Those moon bounce containment fields have always bugged me. I'd love to see that.

    ReplyDelete
  22. The Lush EssMay 16, 2009 at 8:14:00 PM EDT

    Hey...I want to get some of those shoes and plant some grass in my back yard!!! I've the shittiest looking yard in my neighborhood!!!

    I'm scared of bounce houses, though...so I'll be no where near when you go a poppin'?

    ReplyDelete
  23. ÄsK AliCëMay 17, 2009 at 3:35:00 PM EDT

    I freaking hate clowns. What kind of person dresses up in clothes far too big for themselves, paints craploads of makeup all over their faces and goes around "entertaining" (read: scaring) young children?

    Well, I guess other then Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen that is.

    ReplyDelete
  24. ÄsK AliCëMay 17, 2009 at 3:35:00 PM EDT

    Oh yes, and also, the shoes are formidable - can you get them in pink?

    ReplyDelete
  25. Fancy SchmancyMay 18, 2009 at 12:17:00 PM EDT

    Make sure you get it on video so we can laugh at the horrified children over and over and over.

    ReplyDelete
  26. ~EMay 19, 2009 at 4:59:00 AM EDT

    You should emerge from the moon bounce holding a delicate yellow flower in your hands. Perhaps a daisy?

    That way it lessens the impact of the carnage you just performed.

    Or makes you look simple...either way, good stuff!

    ReplyDelete
  27. ThirtysomethingMay 19, 2009 at 12:55:00 PM EDT

    GREAT PLAN, can I borrow your aerator shoes? I dont have grass at my house (not the good kind) but those things look fun!

    ReplyDelete
  28. blissfully caffeinatedMay 22, 2009 at 9:16:00 PM EDT

    You're sick in the head.

    And I mean that in the best possible way.

    ReplyDelete