Sunday, January 24, 2010
Mongolian Lady With Pants Down. Exton Produce Junction.
Were you guys at the Exton Produce Junction an hour ago like me?
And you saw that Mongolian Lady with her pants down?
No? Well here's what happened.
This old Mongolian lady in front of me in line was standing there getting ready to pay but her pants were completely down to the floor! Well, she did have a second pair of pant on but still.
She was about 75 years old and I was going to tell her but I was afraid she'd yell at me,
"I know they down! They are outer pants! You've disrespected my honor!"
Or she's say, "I do not understand."
Then I'd have to say, "Your pants are down to the ground. I'm afraid you will fall when you walk." (talking slowly and loudly and miming out the scene with the help of various vegetables that I'd grabbed). "You see, this eggplant is you..you're much thinner but..and this kale leaf is your pants..your second pair that are down...Now when you start to walk...."
But then there was the fear that she'd get pissed and start yelling at me. People would start looking. Someone at the back of the line would say to another, "I'm not sure what happened. It think that guy tried to pull that old lady's pants down or something. What else could it be?"
Instead I walked away. But I did wait at the back of the store to see what would happen when she turned to walk. In case she needed help after the fall. Or if there was an ideal moment to take a picture.
So she did turn around and try to walk and she was walking so slowly she didn't fall but she did realize that her pants were down. The look was one of, "I'm moving my feet in the regular way but my body isn't moving at the normal speed"*. So she just pulled her pants up and walked away. Looks like it was a normal occurrence for her.
*I'm a bit rusty on my Mongolian but I believe the phrase is "bid nij Tere suu"
damn for a picture!
ReplyDeleteJenJen - I reallyu need to get over my fear of getting caught taking pictures.
ReplyDeleteJim, I swear to god, I think that you are the funniest person that I "know". Thanks so much for putting that completely hilarious image in my head, where it will make me laugh at random for the rest of the day.
ReplyDeleteDiane - thanks! I love hearing when people are actually laughing at the stuff I write.
ReplyDeleteDoes it save lives? Yes, but I also need to hear that people are laughing.
You should definitely mime out more stuff using vegetables. That's comedy gold, my blue friend, comedy gold ;)
ReplyDeletePants on the ground?
ReplyDeletePants on the ground?
She was looking like a fool with her pants on the ground?
It's a scam - she's after your wallet. Just walk away
ReplyDeleteSO your name is Jim? lol Good to know.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, this is awesome. I wish I had seen it. I never get pics of the funny things I see either. I feel bad, especially because I know I'd get caught taking a pic. I'm not stealthy. lol
Alice - yeah. And my invention of the camera concealed inside an Abe Lincoln hat is just too obvious.
ReplyDeleteI try not to interact with Mongolians, unless I'm surrounded by a twenty-foot wall.
ReplyDeleteMJenks - and what are the chances of that? Uh huh.
ReplyDeleteHahaha!! I am not sure if this story makes me want to shop at produce junction more or less often. But the concept of outer pants is funny on its own, plus they FELL DOWN!
ReplyDeleteMaybe she was planning to skitter away like the old lady in Legion and you caught her just in time...saving all of Chester County?
ReplyDeleteMongoloids (that's what they wish to be called) are doing that shi* all the time.
ReplyDeleteare you familiar with the Mongolian Death Worm?
ReplyDeletehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mongolian_Death_Worm
Gage - I will check that out.
ReplyDeleteI just peed a little.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahah, cool story :D
ReplyDeleteIrenelikewhoa - You just peed? My goal is the next make you crap your pants while reading a post.
ReplyDeleteMone - Thanks. And welcome to my blog.