So after the funeral Saturday we're back at my cousin's house. About 15 of us are sitting on their deck. One of my cousins had two friends there. Both were very attractive. They were in their early thirties.
So we're all talking and laughing when out of the blue, my Dad says, (in the way one would say "I need the attention of everyone because what I'm about to say is very important")..he says:
My Dad: Do you know who you look like?
Girl: Me?
(I'm already starting to cringe)
My Dad: You look like Ellen DeGeneris.
Girl: What???
As she's saying, "What?" Everyone is screaming, "No! are you crazy? Ellen DeGeneris?"
My Dad: Has anyone ever seen that show? Look at her..she looks just like her.
He's clueless that telling a woman that she looks like Ellen DeGeneris is an insult. Then throughout the day he's say, "Ellen Degeneris. I'm sticking to it". He couldn't just drop it.
So at what point do you take your dad aside and tell him to keep his mouth shut? And to top it off, he gets everything wrong so he was probably talking about someone else anyway but I just picture the girl looking in the mirror for the next few weeks and examining her face.
"Don't listen to Dad, he gets confused a lot. He really meant Eileen Brennan."
ReplyDeleteJust nod and mention "we're looking into homes for dad this week".
ReplyDeleteHe could have really embarrassed you by saying that she looks like that lesbian, Ellen DeGeneres.
ReplyDeleteAnd really, she not unattractive. She's just a celebrity that looks more like a regular person.
Don't let her be earl lie, she is unattractive, but who cares. so am I...
ReplyDeleteBut that poor poor girl! traumatized for life probably! lol
OK, now do this. Look at the Ellen picture, centering in on her nose and then look at Nana Zibbs on the right in Zibb's sidebar. Seriously.
ReplyDeleteThe shape of the nose matches perfectly, just add aging. Look at her....she looks just like her!
I'm thinking it is going to be more like she will look in the mirror for the rest of her life wondering- that or she is going to invest in some great plastic surgery VERY soon.
ReplyDeleteI've had someone tell me I looked like Ellen DeGeneris once. I was in Greece, and sadly, she knew EXACTLY who Ellen was, even said the lesbian. I STILL look in the mirror sometimes and personally, i don't see it!
ReplyDelete::sigh::
Poor dad ! My husband's uncle did something (even worse) to me but when you see it's innocent and he didn't mean harm ..
ReplyDeleteHis wife gave gim a hard punch in his ribs and she kept on saying that he couldn't guess ages ...!! Can you feel it coming already ?
The crowd we were eating with were 50+ and I was the only 1 under 40.
He 'guessed' I was 50, then said 45 and then his wife told him just to shut up already !!
He said this the same day the pic on my latest blog was taken ; so, you just made my day by saying ; you look like a model ...
hehe, thank you Dr Zibbs !!
..
(I'd rather had him saying ; you look like Ellen !!)
Would it have been better if he'd said Rosie O'Donnell (ugly personality) or Sandra Bernhardt (ugly everything)? THAT would make me lose it.
ReplyDeleteEllen's not pretty, but she's not ugly...
When you find out, let me know.
ReplyDeleteSweet Jesus, that is priceless. I'm glad my dad wasn't the only one who did that "I need the attention of everyone because what I'm about to say is very important" thing. My dad died in 1983 - not sure if I would know what to do with him if he was around today pulling crap like that. Makes a damned good story, though.
ReplyDeleteJJ - good point
ReplyDeleteDo you have any cousins that look like Portia De Rossi?
ReplyDeleteCuz that would be pretty hot, actually.
Well I like Ellen Damn it. Let the poor girl look like her. Maybe your DAD was right????
ReplyDelete- Jennifer
Take it from someone who has been compared to unattractive women her whole life, this is something that girl will not forget. I'd consider moving.
ReplyDeleteLove Chris's comment on putting dad into a home, haha.
Jennifer - Ellen's OK but my Dad was way off.
ReplyDeletefor once, i have to agree with earl.
ReplyDeletei dont think shes "ugly".. she's just not the hollywood standard.
Slyde I agree but this woman was way better looking then her.
ReplyDeleteI think she's adorable. But I wouldn't want to be told I look like her...
ReplyDeleteI think Ellen is attractive - not super pretty or sexy but far from an insult. Still, as a rule of thumb, your dad should always insert "a cuter version of ___ ___" anytime he compares a guest to a famous person, than he will become a charmer no matter what.
ReplyDeleteI think most people take fathers in general with a grain of salt! I'm sure the girl was fine!
ReplyDeleteAsk Alice - yeah. Most people would say the same.
ReplyDeleteI personally think Ellen is pretty hot, especially if she would let her hair grow and get all glammed up like her lesbian lover/wife, Portia di Rossi. Of course, she is a bit older than a 30=something, so that might piss me off.
ReplyDeletenow, wai', hold on a second, son, (half smirking, half laughing, all the while thinking, "how did i get stuck with this guy as a son?" pulling pipe from mouth) you've got it all wrong. your old man is always right. whether it's steering wheels on toddler cars or ellen. that man knows his stuff.
ReplyDeleteI have to say I love Ellen. Love. Her. No, she's not a model, but then again, who is? Well, I'm pretty hot, but ... Anyway, if someone told me I looked like Ellen, I'd think they were blind, but I'd take it as a compliment because that Ellen -- she can dance!
ReplyDeletemcglinch - well said.
ReplyDeleteWell, what's wrong with Ellen? I think she's pretty. If someone told me I looked like Ellen that wouldn't freak me out.
ReplyDeleteIf someone told me I looked like Cammilla Parker Bowles, however, them thar would be fightin' words....