Do you know when you hear a complete stranger talk, you've never met them before, but you know exactly what they're like? Imagine hearing this true babble (needs to be read fast, loudly and with rage for true impact):
"..They won't let me see my OWN grandchild when I want. Is that right? Is it?...Sure, I'll I can drive a half hour to babysit but can I drop in anytime? No.
And look at that house. I started buying them Snowbabies to decorate their house..I go over there...not one in site. Not one! Ohhhhhh..Snowbabies aren't fancy enough? Well listen up Missy, I've collected snowbabies and all my sisters collected Snowbabies. We're Snowbabies people. If you don't like them then at least don't deprive my grandchild of the Snowbaby experience.
That's it, next time I'm invited to babysit, I'm bringing Snowbabies. I don't care. Am I right? Am I right?"
If you're like me, you can tell so much more about this person from what they've disclosed in this rant. What style of pants do they wear? Stretch. What do they look forward to? The Fair. What do they say when a 3 year old falls? "You fall down and go boom."
You see? Sometimes it only takes so many pieces of information to really get to the bottom of a person - which leads me to my point. When people find out that I have a blog and ask what it's about - it's very hard to explain. Even for someone like me - who has an unbelievable command of the language. (You can tell by the big ass words and perfect grammar). Instead of telling them what my blog is about, I simply tell them to do a Google image search* of "That Blue Yak". It tells all. To see the unpeeled layers of my onion, click here.
*I still don't know why some of my more recent images don't show up in a Google search but blog that I've commented on do. Does it help to add information to my pictures (name them) before posting them? Someone please explain. It's the least you can do for getting to read my blog subscription free.
Maybe she should start over with Precious Moments. Did she ever consider maybe they're Precious Moment people not Snowbaby people?!
ReplyDeleteSnowbabies? Well, la di da. All I ever got when I was little were trolls.
ReplyDeleteIt did make me laugh rifling through those pages of image search results. What a random sampling of a bizarre, bizarre world.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Who the fuck knows why anything shows up how it does on Google? What are we, Google Experts? I'm pretty sure there's a very boring and cumbersome algorithm at work behind the scenes, which no lay person could even begin to understand. They would probably need to sit up to try to begin to comprehend it. GET IT? LAY PERSON? THEY SHOULD SIT UP? YOU KNOW? GET IT?
Shut up.
I can picture the light blue denim stretch pants right now...as they type about snowbabies!
ReplyDeleteMissy's mom is kind of a bitch.
ReplyDeletePeeling back the layers of your onion made my eyes water.
She'da been gettin' the "Are you f***ing serious" stare from me.
ReplyDeleteI would accept Snow Babies if someone would offer to babysit every once and awhile.
ReplyDeleteand no, i don't wear stretch polyester.
**i do think it helps with labeling the pic before posting.**
Take back the Snowbabies and start them on Depression Glass. Hmmmm that makes me sound OLD?? No, I am not old and I love to wear Jeans and prefer to go barefoot 24/7.
ReplyDeleteWho's Goggle?
HAPPY WEDNESDAY!!!
- Jennifer
You are SO right. That's the same person who has flamingos on their lawn (plastic pink ones) and Jeff Foxworthy DVD collections. She's also large with sandy blonde (dyed) hair and wears Crocs to the mall. She drives an old beat-up pick up and has a floral sofa that would give a sane person an aneurysm.
ReplyDeleteThose Snowbabies are absolutely A-DOR-A-BLE!!! I must have them!
ReplyDeleteGod, are they cute. I'm having trouble containing myself. I mean, goddamn! Have you ever seen anything so fucking precious!?
Snowbabies. You are my new reason for living.
I bet all them snowbabies were bought on QVC
ReplyDelete#1
Sometimes I wonder why I ever left West Chester. Then I here stories about snow babies and quickly remember.
ReplyDeleteHilarious.
ReplyDeleteAm I crazy? Snowbabies! Am I right, or what?
How awful for her Snowbaby-bombarded relative!! Just give her the money you crazy woman! I hate collectibles with a passion. Remember the Beanie Baby phase? And piles of crocheted afghans? Precious Moments? Alan Kincaid prints? Christmas town? Hummel plates? Same women - they give my gender a bad name.
ReplyDeleteZibbs- those Google Images of yours are....well....insightful. At the very least!
ReplyDeleteThere would be far fewer snowbabies around if snowmen would just get their snowballs snipped.
ReplyDeleteSince I'm at a loss for a comment, I'll just say "Bubble up."
ReplyDeleteAlong with the stretch pants, she's wearing an embroidered sweatshirt in a pastel color and white sneakers with thick soles. Sneakers that look something like Snowbabies...
ReplyDeleteI am with cdp. I got the embroidered sweatshirt thing and permed hair.
ReplyDeleteEASY!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteYou usually have no alternate text to go along with your images.
Say you want to find an image by the search "Yak".
1. use that in the post title
2. use it in the alternet text
3. use it in the tags
4. wait .... images take longer in Googles priority index, esp. if you are a pagerank 4 or lower.
REALLY PUMPING to see "YAK" ???
Change the: img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5246051977877388738"
to
img title="Yak"
voila!!