OK, first off, except for having been trampled by a huge woman at my press conference I'm fine. I'm now safely in my That Blue Yak bunker enjoying a refreshing can of Bubble Up Cola.
Well here we go. I've been asked to reveal myself lately. I've been asked who I am. I've been asked if I'm married. Honestly, I would love to reveal everything about myself but if I did, my career would be over. What is my real career? It may sound odd but I market a self help program that help the retarded feel better about themselves. It's called, "You think you got it bad, look at this dude."...It's a powerpoint based program that shows really, really, really retarded people. OK I'm lying.
The truth is however, that the reason I don't reveal my identity is that I know that if I did, I wouldn't be able to write things that I do in this blog. It is very tempting but whenever I read that a blogger wishes that their family or coworkers didn't know about their blog or that they had stayed behind the shadows it makes me feel kind of bad for them. How many people are afraid to write something but they don't because they're afraid the wrong person might read it. I mean seriously, look at some of the stuff that's going up on this here blog. All I need is for a client to say, "We can know longer do business together." Then they get out from behind their desk and they're one of those pear shaped people. And you now how I feel about pear shaped people.
As for a little personal info, I am married. Sorry ladies. I also have 2.3 kids - although the .3 one I don't count because we have zero dwarf blood in my family so I think my wife may have cheated on me for that one.
Will you ever know who I am? Maybe. In fact, Falwless and I email regularly and I even emailed her a picture of myself from the shore. I'm sure it's hanging proudly in her trailer. Whiskey Marie asked for my addresses and she sent me a cool card. She could post my home address on her blog but I'm sure (pray) she won't. In fact, if you want to be my friend on Facebook, invite me. My email address is Lebner1@yahoo.com. (Also, if you send me an email, make sure to put "that blue yak" in the subject line). If we get to know each other, maybe we will meet. I'd consider even adding people to my LinkedIn contacts.
I've even met some local bloggers in person and would like to meet more. I've been talking to some local bloggers and we were thinking about having an open call for area bloggers to go out and have some drinks. I'll post something when the date is set. I just would have a problem if someone spitefully posted my identity and put my job and blog at risk. Because if you think I'm good at coming up with funny stuff...you should see how good I am at revenge. Oh boy. It ain't pretty.
So there you go. If you have any questions ask away. I'm not saying I'm going to answer them all but feel free. I love you all *throwing kisses and roses*.
Well here we go. I've been asked to reveal myself lately. I've been asked who I am. I've been asked if I'm married. Honestly, I would love to reveal everything about myself but if I did, my career would be over. What is my real career? It may sound odd but I market a self help program that help the retarded feel better about themselves. It's called, "You think you got it bad, look at this dude."...It's a powerpoint based program that shows really, really, really retarded people. OK I'm lying.
The truth is however, that the reason I don't reveal my identity is that I know that if I did, I wouldn't be able to write things that I do in this blog. It is very tempting but whenever I read that a blogger wishes that their family or coworkers didn't know about their blog or that they had stayed behind the shadows it makes me feel kind of bad for them. How many people are afraid to write something but they don't because they're afraid the wrong person might read it. I mean seriously, look at some of the stuff that's going up on this here blog. All I need is for a client to say, "We can know longer do business together." Then they get out from behind their desk and they're one of those pear shaped people. And you now how I feel about pear shaped people.
As for a little personal info, I am married. Sorry ladies. I also have 2.3 kids - although the .3 one I don't count because we have zero dwarf blood in my family so I think my wife may have cheated on me for that one.
Will you ever know who I am? Maybe. In fact, Falwless and I email regularly and I even emailed her a picture of myself from the shore. I'm sure it's hanging proudly in her trailer. Whiskey Marie asked for my addresses and she sent me a cool card. She could post my home address on her blog but I'm sure (pray) she won't. In fact, if you want to be my friend on Facebook, invite me. My email address is Lebner1@yahoo.com. (Also, if you send me an email, make sure to put "that blue yak" in the subject line). If we get to know each other, maybe we will meet. I'd consider even adding people to my LinkedIn contacts.
I've even met some local bloggers in person and would like to meet more. I've been talking to some local bloggers and we were thinking about having an open call for area bloggers to go out and have some drinks. I'll post something when the date is set. I just would have a problem if someone spitefully posted my identity and put my job and blog at risk. Because if you think I'm good at coming up with funny stuff...you should see how good I am at revenge. Oh boy. It ain't pretty.
So there you go. If you have any questions ask away. I'm not saying I'm going to answer them all but feel free. I love you all *throwing kisses and roses*.
People probably thought I was kidding with the "BFF" next to your link in my blogroll. HA!
ReplyDeleteI'd like to hereby open up the bidding for the real picture of Dr. Zibbs. We'll start at $20 cash money. Or, if you prefer, a $20 traveler's check. I may even take your Diner's Club card. I'll think about it.
I posted a perfectly good picture of you on my blog, better known as the blog I used to blog. You diddn't have a problem with that. Oh, and I'll pay for pictures of my baby falw.
ReplyDeleteWait..What ..you mean thats not your real picture?
ReplyDeleteDamn......
Flaw---Do you take credit cards?......'cause I have lots of pretty ones no one else will take!
sometimes I wish I kept my mouth shut and told no one I knew about my blog. I think it would be much, much more entertaining! cause it sucks right now. Do I still get invited to drinks if I suck?
ReplyDeleteYou have clients? I hate when that happens...they ruin ALL THE FUN...
ReplyDeleteThanks for loving my dog! She's a cutie!!!
Keep us posted on your Open Call for Area Bloggers..Good posts coming from that.
GO PHILLIES!!!
- Jennifer
When you meet up with people you should wear a paper bag over your head with eye holes... Banksy (the famous british graffiti artist) once did a "book" signing in Brooklyn and he sat inside a box to hide his identity. He had a whole for his hand to slip through and grab the book.
ReplyDeleteSmoochies - of course you get invited to drinks.
ReplyDeleteanonymous (the poor man's anonymous) - That's a great idea and I'm glad one of my readers knows about outsider art. I love Banksy's work. Great call.
You mean....you're not a real Doctor???
ReplyDeleteSay it isn't so......
As you may or may not know...we were recently found out. The finder outers face certain dismemberment if they open their mouth.
peace
#2
One more thing.....can you have that drinkfestmeeting around the holiday's?? Sista #2 will be visiting sista #1 and we would LOVE to attend!!!!
ReplyDeletepeace
#2
Zibbs, thank you for the personal information. I feel so close to you now. ;)
ReplyDeleteZibbs.
ReplyDeleteWell thats really nice of you to say.. I guess I can look good sometimes.. haha.
And i saw your picture.
of when you were a baby..
um stunning?
and hey.
don't blame your wife for you dwarf blood.
obviously from your picture.. its you...
no offense need to be taken.
OK I get it now!! Interesting and titilating tidbits about your persona-great way to reel us in.. Good for you. Looks like it's your blogger world and we are just living in it.
ReplyDeleteI am almost tempted to bid $20 for the real picture of you but Im afrais it would ruin the allure of the mystery.....
OK I get it now!! Interesting and titilating tidbits about your persona-great way to reel us in.. Good for you. Looks like it's your blogger world and we are just living in it.
ReplyDeleteI am almost tempted to bid $20 for the real picture of you but Im afrais it would ruin the allure of the mystery.....
Sista #2 - I can't tell you when it will be. The way things are going it probably will be near the holidays.
ReplyDeleteJ.Hi - No I fel cose to YOU.
Catherine - Glad you stopped by. Are you as nosy as your sister? tee hee (that's me laughing)
sorry for the double post! You really are experiencing technical difficuties
ReplyDeleteCandy's Daily - I'm not trying to reel anyone in...OK . I guess I am .Glad you stopped by. I've seen your blog too.
ReplyDeleteNow that I know you are not a creepy 40 year old in your parent's basement, blogging in your stained undies, I take it all back. I honestly wish I hadn't told my sisters about my blog, because I really need to write a story about the one who actually reads it. And I can't. But you should totally change your relationship status on Facebook so we females will stop having sexy dreams of you. I'm pretty sure you wife won't like that.
ReplyDeleteZibbs - I thought we were new BFF's. I got necklaces and everything....
ReplyDelete...and then I read that you are calling me nosy! Never mind that I called myself nosy... am I that bad?
I knew if I waited I'd have you exactly where I wanted... for a cool million I'll keep my mouth closed. Oh, Fancy Schmancy, you're actually not too far off base....
ReplyDeleteSafe in a bunker (where there are probably mattresses, wink wink) . . . sensitive mystery "clients" . . . threats of revenge . . .
ReplyDeleteShit, you're in the . . . um, never mind. Interesting to learn a little about you and your "familia", if you know what I mean.
Although you're my sworn enemy, it's interesting that our businesses are so similar. Except I kick it up a, nay, two notches. I run a dating service for the Againtarded (or REtarded, if you prefer). Of course, we all know that they can't date (they don't possess the mental capacity to relate to others and it's not legal outside of Utah and Texas) but family members don't respond as well to my true motive which is to get them laid by others of their breed to limit their brain envy based raping sprees of normal folks. It's a messy job but if I can save just one old lady or her dog from facing that kind of againtard strength in a dark alley than I'll know my life has meant something.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your dwarf child. I hope he doesn't eat all of the insulation from your attic...er, his bedroom.
Ah, the mystery will keep me coming back...
ReplyDeleteThis has nothing to do with your identity...except for the fact that I think anonymous is sexy...and so is dean cain (ala 1990s, not now that he's fat and old...)
ReplyDeletewhere was I?
...
crap, I forgot.
But yeah, this had nothing to do with your identity.
=)
Part of the charm is in the mystery. and your oddness. I mean this all in a good way.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I like when bloggers remain anonymous. It's more mysterious that way! Keep up the good work. Or bad work. Or whatever it is you do.
ReplyDeleteNo dwarf blood in your family? Do you need some, because I could get you some.
ReplyDeleteWell whatddya know. Like I said. Layers.
ReplyDeleteAnd I feel privileged to have been invited to your LinkedIn account, especialyl with all these layoffs going on here...LOL
Although, there's no pic of you on there, either.
Were you at the parade last night?? I find myself looking for you, but I have no idea in hell who I'm looking for! The anonymity makes it interesting, I suppose...that is, as long as you're not the WC Bomber aka Oran-Jo.
Kimmie - I was going to go to the parade but didn't. I'm sure we'll meet soon.
ReplyDeleteBizarro Zibbs - Uh...OK....right....
You exist because we believe you exist. If we stop believing, you're nothing!!
ReplyDeleteSorry, I was watching "Waxwork" the other night.
I think the less I know about you, the better. I don't want my fantasies to be shattered!
ReplyDeleteI'm still going to imagine you as an antisocial billionaire who fights crime in a kangaroo costume in his spare time. I don't care what "reality" you're trying to shove down our throats.
ReplyDeleteOh, and you play harmonica in a jug band on the weekends.
You have my address too- that's your guarantee that I won't take that billboard out...
Oh, and I'd like to know if you have any cats. I like cats.
Whiskey, there are many things imagine you to be as well. As for the letter, I already told you but it's awesome. As for cats, I like cats as much as you like shrimp.
ReplyDeleteAwww C'mon Zibbs... teeellll meeee
ReplyDeleteAre you really Batman?