Listen To This Voice Mail - The Sistas On My Snapvine.

Do you want to HEAR something funny? You heard me right. You must listen to my Snapvine recorder now. The message is from Sista #1 and Sista #2 from the blog Holy Crappers. #1 lives in the burbs of Philly and #2 lives in sunny, sunny Florida.

They left me the voice message that you can hear on my Snapvine Recorder (see my sidebar) and I've got to tell you that I sat with a shit grin on my face while I listened to it a few times. Hysterical! It's ego stroking goodness made my day.

I think it's great that they had the courage to leave me - Dr Zibbs - a message. You see, I'm a person just like you. I put my pants on the same way. One leg at a time. Unless I'm doing my imitation of that Brook Shields jean commercial. In that case, I'm on my back and I put both legs in at the same time. But you know what I'm saying.

The Sistas have been around since my early blogging days - June 2008. Before that, there were very few readers. Anyways, check out their message AND their blog. And why don't YOU consider leaving me a voicemail message.

Who Do You Think Bingo Anita Is?

So Anita the Bingo player left another message on the Snapvine recorder (see sidebar). Hysterical. There are three messages from her now. Who do you think she is? Maybe she'll give us some clues. Love it!

I think it's Sass but have no idea.

Listen to the sexy voice of Sista #2. Tell me she couldn't be doing voice over work. And who is "Jill"? The one that says, "You've been a bad, bad boy? I can't take it. These are all great. Please out all of the unknown bloggers so I can move them all to my That BlueYak SVP Hall of Fame.

Keep em comin'. As a reminder, put the number in your wallet now so you can leave a message when you're all fired up tonight. Oh yeah.

I'm Proud That There Are People Who Have Courage

See. You did it. In my last post, I asked for at least three voice messages on the old Snapvine recorder - or the SVR - and you did it. Now isn't it great to have the added bonus of some voices on this blog?

I'm surprised how many people thought they had to leave these great messages. I guess since I set the standard so high, everyone thought that they had to leave these unbelievable, rehearsed messages. If you try to live up to impossible standards, you'll always fail. Are we clear with that ..(holding your chin and making you look into my eyes while I talk like Mike Brady).. I said are we clear with that?

It's like if you came to my castle and you were served the most unbelievable gourmet meal, while drinking the finest wine and were entertained by barely clothed dancers (normal height) and dwarfs. Then, the following week when I arrived at your trailer I was served a Suzi-Q on a paper plate and entertained by watching Mama's Family on VHS. Even if you wanted to do Mama's Family scene studies because "Paw likes to see various interpretations of his story" - I wouldn't complain. I'd be happy with the fact that you tried. No matter how sad it was. We're. All. Different.

So from now on, get comfortable with the old SVR. I will probably delete messages every once and a while to keep things fresh. So move into the space age and accept this new technology. Just give it shot and say hello. Jot that number down now so you can call when you're good and drunk. Remember, you can delete your message before sending it if you get chicken - BWAKK BWAK BWAK!

So Let's Hear Some Messages On The Snapvine Recorder

As I mentioned yesterday, I added the Snapvine recorder to my sidebar. If you want to hear some messages I left on other bloggers recorders, check the rap song out here. Or what I thought was an anonymous prank call here. Or the double whammy here.

Someone left a really funny one on mine about playing Bingo. I'm not sure who it was but I think it might be H. Whoever it was - excellent. So before I leave more messages I want to hear from you guys. Here are a few ideas:

- Sing a Christmas song.

- Record your thoughts while you're lying in that big, lonely bed.

- Tell me some juicy gossip about some bloggers.

- Do a crappy imitation.

- Record the fight you're having with your spouse, "Dr Zibbs this, Dr Zibbs that..I'M NOT DR ZIBBS!!! NOBODY IS!! WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS!!"

- Record the sounds from you fascinating jobs.

- Record the absurd response your preacher gives you when you ask him to explain why I can't be Jesus. Or at least the holy ghost.

Go ahead. It doesn't have to be brilliant or funny. Just think of it as another comment - unbrilliant and unfunny. Not all of you but.....you know. And don't forget to check back on the hour to hear the great messages that are going to be piling up on the SVR. OK ready.......Begin!

I've Been Outed By Technology Damn It!

..well, kind of. H from the blog It's Always Darkest Before I Open My Eyes, added a Snapvine feature to her blog. I called and left a prank phone call but didn't realize I'd be outed by my THAT BLUE YAK avatar. Oh well. I also left one on Whiskey Marie's without knowing.

And if you look on my sidebar, I've added a Snapvine gadget as well so please leave me some voice messages. Make sure to listen to the prompts at the end because you can edit your messages after you get all nervous and screw up the first few times.

Maybe I'll have a contest later asking people to do various imitations on the Snapvine recorder...yeah...I'm totally gonna do that. Or sing or something. Yeah. Maybe that too.

You can add the Snapvine voice command to your sidebar in less than five minutes so you might as well do it. Imagine the possibility of getting a message from me? Yup. The future is here. Today. Now excuse me while I call my butler to whip me up a batch of refreshing Tang.