I Hate Making Bad Food Ordering Decisions. Downingtown Wegmans.

Mmmm. Look what I had for an early lunch. In that container you got your...

- Gorgonzola stuffed olives.
- Feta stuffed olives.
- Artichokes.
- Mozzarella cheese
- Cherry pepper poppers (ham was used instead of proscuitto which should be a crime)

So I'm eating it in my car and got kind of pissed because you need something to alternate bites with all the salty/olive oily stuff. I usually get some almonds and a piece of crunchy bread or another type of cheese but didn't.

So then I found myself eating it and getting kind of pissed at myself. Kind of like when you go to a restaurant, meals come and you look at the person next to you and think, "Damn it! I should have gotten THAT!" And the person knows they made the better choice and is all, "This is REALLY good!"

"Oh good. So is this." (Yeah right.)

Oh well.

DAMN IT I SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN SOMETHING ELSE!! *looks for someone to blame*

Jesus Tells West Whiteland Man To Continue Taking Extra Wing

The following is true life story that actually happened to That Blue Yak Marketing Manager Ted Murphy:

First off, let me tell you that the wings at the Downingtown Wegmans are downright delicious. You can get 10 wings for $6,99. You get to pick from several styles including BBQ, Teriyaki, Southern style and more. It's a self serve so a few months ago it became a bit tempting to "accidentally" put an 11th wing in the box. My crime went unnoticed 5 times.

In addition to my eyes being bigger than my stomach and not being able to finish the wings AND thinking what I was doing might be wrong, I decided last week to even things out be getting only 9 wings.

Feeling like a saint, I went to my car to eat the wings. I threw my tie over my shoulder so it wouldn't get in the food. Then I lined my lap with paper towels because I'm such a messy eater that I need to take major precautions so I don't get food all over myself.

The carnage began. The wings were as tasty as ever and I ate them carefully as I drove over to the Home Depot across route 30. I spilled not a single heavenly drop of sauce on myself which was a miracle. I parked the car and reached for the extra napkins that I thought were in my car. To my horror, I was out of napkins and my hands were completely caked with sauce and the sticky teryaki sauce. It looked like I'd been having a catch with sticky buns. I tried to wipe some of the gook off with tissues but the tissues stuck like feathers to tar.

I decided that I'd have to walk briskly to the bathroom to clean up. My fear was that if I ran into someone and they put their hand out to shake I would have to say, "Oh, I can't shake - See? My hands are completely covered with sauce and tissues."

I arrived in the bathroom, turned on the water and this is the image that stared back at me:

I think we can all take this as a signal from Jesus that he was punishing me for taking 9 wings. I don't know why he wants me to return to taking 11 wings but I will have to follow his orders. He is Jesus after all.

Wegmans, Robbery, Busted! According to the January 28th issue of the Daily Local News, a Coatesville man "entered the Downingtown Wegmans Market, filled the liner of his jacket with frozen shrimp and exited the store without paying." The Daily Local News says that the Wegman's store employees then followed the 28 year old into a parking lot and found two bags of shrimp with a combined value of $84 hidden in his jacket.

OK dummy, a few points:

- Don't go into MY Wegmans and be "crime-in" up the area. If the Wegmans "eye" gets a bit nervous - some - not me mind you, but some won't be able to throw an extra wing or two into their box at the chicken wing bar. Let's keep that cool.

- If you're going to steal, don't be a dope! "Frozen shrimp?" Puuleeeaaase! Do you know that Wegmans has 15 types of sausage including 4 andouille variations? Did you consider a few wheels of Asiago Cheese wheels? Do you know what you can get for them on the streets of Coatesville? Did you ever hear of the "Coatesville Cheese King of Star Alley." Read your Coatesville history my friend.

- And lastly, do you know that Wegmans Downingtown stands no further than two football fields away from the ashes of the sacred Downingtown Farmers Market? You will be haunted my friend - you will be haunted.

To learn more about Wegmans click here

And to learn about the different types of cheese, click here.