Nightmare and Dreams From Chester County Blogger.

I was away with my son two weeks ago at a hotel because he had to pick his college classes so we stayed overnight at a hotel. So in the morning he says, “Dad what were you having a nightmare about?”

And then I remembered what I did in the middle of the night. I woke up, sat up and loudly said, “WHA WHA WHA WHA WHA WHA WHA AHHHHHHHH!!!”

The “AHHHHHH” being a scream. Then I tried to speak but the words wouldn’t come out. Kind of like a stroke victim, “A ra ra ra ra ra”…

I forget what the nightmare was about but I have been having more nightmares these days for some reason. And I wake up screaming.

But I still have tons of regular dreams too. Like the other night two people were trying to convince me to go to Halloween party at their CCD. I guess it was CCD for adults because they were two grown women. And I didn’t want to go because they wanted me to wear a grass skirt and be like male hula dancer. And I was too embarrassed to wear it. And because CCD is BS.

Then the one woman jumped on top of me and said I got a joke for you. And then she pretended to kiss me. She said, “Anda one…”. And I’m thinking, “OK this is weird.”

Then she kissed me for real and said, “..Anda two.”

And then she said, “…Anda THREE.” And then she pretended to pull a toy out of her butt and said, “Get it??”

And I just wanted her to get off of me so I said, “Oh yeah. I get it.”

What do you make of that?

Oh. And I had a dream last night that I had a staple caught in my dick and the local news stations were calling because they wanted to interview me.

My Mommy Got Me A New Pillow For Christmas. Fluffy.

You read that post title correctly. My mommy got me a new pillow for Christmas. And as I wrote on Twitter: "..it works great! I'm gonna call it Lil' Fluff - the pillow who believed in love."

See. You need to follow me on twitter (@DrZibbs) or you'll miss all the pillow related news that I may tweet about. Imagine hearing this news an hour ago? Instead, you're just hearing it now. It's kind of sad if you think about it.

So anyways. The pillow works great. It's super fluffy. My old pillow was such a dick. It was all flat and used up. If I was ridiculous enough to name an OLD pillow I'd probably call it something like "Pete the pillow that dreamed of being a pancake..and did".

And it's true. It's like someone broke into my house every night then brought Pete outside and ran him over with a steam roller. Everyday it seemed to get flatter and flatter. There's really no other explaination I can think of. Can you?

I've been complaining about my pillow for a few years but when I wake up, I never seem to remember how crappy it is and then drive to a store and buy a new pillow. And that's pretty bad if you think about it because it means that I've forgotten the same thing, everyday for like 1200 days IN A ROW!

Oh my God. Once I see it in writing that's pretty bad. Let me read that over again.

(reads it over again)

Yup. That's pretty bad.

Who Wants To Sleep With Me Into The Mystic? Van Morrison.

It's 10:35 Eastern time as I write this and I'm going to bed. And I'm going to put on some Van Morrison to listen to on my Ipod. I'll start with Van Morrison's "Into the Mystic".

I love that song.

Here's an idea. When you go to bed, hug a pillow and hum that song and pretend the pillow is me. It's OK. That's not cheating. Don't get all crazy though and draw a picture of me on the pillow with a Sharpie because that is cheating.

I'm sorry that I have to leave you but I have a huge day tomorrow which includes a big party at night. So I need to hit the hay. So here's a cover version of "Into the Mystic".

Enjoy.