Lawrence Welk Is Doin' Some Tokin'! Weed Smoking Straights.

 Awww yeah. My man LW is endorsing toking. Progressive ass son of a bitch.

Lookalike Alert! Who Do These Dudes From The Band Spider Look Like? Spicoli.

Did you ever hear of the band Spider? No? Ne neither. But I saw this album cover on one of my favorite blogs - Retrospace - and had to post it because looks like we have a little lookalike action happening here.

Take a look. Who do you think each of them looks like? OK Help me out here because I can only figure three out but the other one looks familiar and if it comes to me I'll post it in the comments. Here we go. Going from far right....

Far right (red shirt) - Totally Sean Penn as Spicoli. Am I right? Hmmmm?

Second from right (blue shirt) - The poor man's Rick Springfield.

Third from right (yellow shirt)  - George Thorogood with a wig. Look at the mouth.

Fourth from right (black shirt) - I'm stumped.

And here's Spicoli if you want to compare images....

See??

THIS IS SO GREAT! Shine On You Crazy Diamond. Kendra Morris.

What's your favorite Pink Floyd Album? Mine has always been "Wish You Were Here." Ahh. The days of sitting around the dorms late at night in my Freshman and Sophomore year. The room dark except for candles. Listening to that album with a friend or two. After...You know.

How many of you did this? Come on...lets see a show of hands.

And on that album one of my favorite songs is "Shine On You Crazy Diamond". It's about the crazy founding Pink Floyd member Syd Barrett in case you didn't know. He left the band because he went crazy. But then he actually came into the studio when they were recording the song but he was fat and had shaved his head so at first they had no idea who is was. (Here's the Wiki page if you want to read about it).

But before you read about it check this out. I was seeing a movie the other day and the trailer for the new Colin Farrell movie Dead Man Down cam on and there's a cover of Shine on You Crazy Diamond playing. And IT'S GREAT!!! Super eire! It's sung by a woman named Kendra Morris. Let me know what you think. I love it!

This Had Me Laughing So Hard. Cats In The Cradle. Coatesville, PA Church.

I saw a friend over the holidays that told me this story that I can't stop thinking about. I've laughed out loud at least twenty times thinking about it. Here it is. He said when he moved to his new house a few years ago he wanted to find a church that was close to bring his kids to. There was the traditional church and the "cool church."

So he and his wife and kids go to the cool church and in the middle of the Mass. It happens. It looks like there is going to be some gay ass acting performance. The song Cats In The Cradle starts playing and from the front of the church a man in a suit slowly walks out. He's pretending to talk on his cell phone and he seems preoccupied. (OK this in itself would have me falling out of the pew).

He slowly walks down the aisle and stops about a quarter of the way down. Busily talking (miming that he's talking) on his cell. Totally overacting with the hand motions and everything.

Then...everyone in the church looks toward the back at something. My friend looks back and what is it? A nerdy, chubby kid holding a baseball and baseball glove. He's walking toward his "dad."

(Remember. Cats In The Cradle is still playing.)

He walks up to the dad and motions that he wants to have a catch. The dad puts his hand out as if to say, "I can't talk son." and points to the phone as if to say, "Can't you see I'm busy?"

He also said it looked like the first time the kid had ever had a baseball the way he was throwing it in the glove.

HAHAHA!!! My friend said it took everything in him not to erupt into laughter. But his wife sat there stone faced. Able to hide that she was holding in the laughter. Which made him laugh harder. Oh my God I would have died!!! I wish he had told me about it back in the day because I would have gone to see that.

Well, hope you all think it's funny. Just the visual of it slays me.

In related news here's a short post I wrote a few years ago about my thoughts when I was at a Communion. 

Bobby Sherman's Bulge Search Leads To My Blog. Pants Sniffing Lady.

OK. Who is it? Is it you? .... What about you? ....Or maybe it's YOU!

Who is searching "Bobby Sherman's Bulge" because it keeps coming up in my Google analytics. I posted a video of him a few years ago singing "Easy Come, Easy Go" and now I keep getting Bobby Sherman bulge searches on my blog. It's really taking this blog downtown. Ruining the purity of THAT BLUE YAK. Here's another picture of him:

He is pretty bulgy I guess. Could just be the tight pants. Is he known for having a big bulge? Like Milton Berle is known for having a big d#@k?

Maybe this lady knows because she was the proud winner of Bobby Sherman pants at his convention:

You KNOW she sniffed them.

"Cheryl! You're not going to believe this! I WON BOBBY SHERMAN'S PANTS!! *hangs up clam shell phone and goes into stall at convention center and takes a whiff.*

A Lame Album I Had. Themes From Hit TV Shows. Rolling Stones 12 X 5.

Who the hell would buy THIS album?? Themes from Hit TV Shows.

*Zibbs slowly raises his hand*

I'm not kidding. Well to tell you the truth it could have been my sister that bought it. And if it wasn't lame enough the songs weren't even sung by the original artists!!!

I wish I could see all the old albums and 45's that we used to have when I was sixth grade and younger. We would play them over and over in my basement on this crappy green record player that my dad won in a sales contest. A few records were bought by my sisters like The Partridge Family but most were picked up by my mom at garage sales. She would just buy random records. Here are a few 45's I remember:

Walk Right In (then they say "sit right down" - not sure who sung it)
Poppa Got A Brand New Bag - James Brown
Judy in Disguise 
The Night Chicago Died
Seasons in the Sun
Bad, Bad Leroy Brown

Damn. I know there's more. I'll leave them in the comments section when they hit me.

And other than the usual square Dad records he did have a few rock albums but he never them played. He had a Paul Revere and the Raiders album and Rolling Stones album. 12 X 5 and Out of Our Heads.

OK now it's going to kill me that I can't remember more of those 45's because whenever I hear them on the radio it all comes back to me.  

Jelly Roll. You Ain't Getting None.

 I've been listening to this Bobby Darin and Johnny Mercer Album lately. It's called, "Two of a Kind." It gets pretty cheesy at times but whatever. I was hoping to share with you the song, "You Ain''t Gonna Get None of My Jellyroll." Sadly I only found this creepy thing on the YouTube:



But I did find this song from the album: 



So what do you think?

I Love Me Some Cheesy Impersonaters. Alan Alda. Worst Robin Williams. Neil Diamond.

As you may know I LOVE lookalikes. And in the sub category are celebrity impersonators. And for me the more they don't look like the person the better. Remember the Meatloaf impersonator I blogged about a while ago? Here are some more:

Alan Alda -  I have the funny feeling this guy sounds nothing like Alan Alda. But it is an imitation I'd like to try and get down. And did you ever notice that Alan Alda and Stern sound similar?

Barbara Streisand - Looks like Babs needs a little confidence. He/she looks nervous. Looks like he/she saw a ghost. "Ladies and Gentlemen I give you Barbara Streisand!" *curtain drops* Cricket... Cricket...

Bob Hope - "Boy I gotta tell ya!" Why does he have an expression like Gomer Pyle?

Bill Cosby - "You kiiiiiiids. With the dancin'. With the hippin and the hoppin and the mashed potato and the baked potato..." (My Bill Cosby imitation is probably at a 5 on a scale of 1 - 10. It's in the works.

Michael Jackson - Dude. Seriously?

Neil Diamond - "I no one heard a thing I said...not even the chaiiir...."

Robin Williams - "Uh huh..Ooooo...Oooo" Is there anyway he can be more annoying than the real Robin Williams? I'd like to pay him to perform at a party and after 5 seconds turn the lights on and say, "I'm sorry. I'll pay you but you're awful. You're going to have to leave." Then have my goons escort him out the door.

Cher - You know this dude is always in costume. And for some reason I think that Cher impersonators try a bit more than the other impersonators. I'm not sure why I think this. And I bet they refer to their impersonation as their "craft."

So there you go. Which is your favorite?

Who Approved This Album Cover. Gus Brendel.

Seriously. Do you think they did this shot on purpose? My guess is that it was all done in innocence but please.

Sophisticated MOMMA!. Kool And The Gang. JT Taylor. Getting Laid.

Last week I was saying to my lady, "Sophisticated MOMMA!"

And she had no idea what I was talking about. "You don't know that line from the Kool and the Gang song 'Ladies Night?'"

"Nope." She said.

Say whuuuuuuuuuu?? She's younger than me but not THAT much younger. Well here it is. He says  "Sophisticated Momma" at 1:53. Something about trying to impress a woman by calling her a sophisticated momma always struck me as funny. But my man JT Taylor (lead singer) is one smooth dude so I bet he could pull it off. And I could too. I would probably do that move like I tilt my head a bit and I look a bit confused. Then I give the lady the old elevator eyes and says,
"Baby I tell you one thing. You are one sophisticated momma. God dyaaaaaaaamn!"




And speaking of sophisticated Momma's*.......What's Happeniiiiiiiiiiin'???........

*Hey, Hey, HEY Hey!

Don't Lie. You Like These Songs. Roly Poly. London Calling.

Pretty hot if you want my  two cents. And check out the kick ass slide guitar action:



The Clash rocking Brand New Cadillac. Live. Probably on my top 10 favorite albums list. (London Calling):



Whoa check this out. I was searching for the song Roly Poly and came across these Japanese cutie pies: 



OK here's the Roly Poly song I was talking about. It's Norah Jones singing with the Little Willies. It's a cover of an old song. I always picture a little chubby German kid in lederhosen dancing to it. I wish Norah would let me make the video:

How Many Women Has Mick Jagger Slept With? Gene Simmons.

Did anyone read this recent Huffington post article about Mick Jagger?

His biographer claims that he's slept with over 4000 women.  To tell you the truth I'm not that surprised. But there are a few things in the article I found rather interesting:

1) He slept with Angelina Jolie. Did anyone know that? I remember he slept with Mackenzie Phillips when she was a teen but never heard that he was with Angelina Jolie.

2) He tried to get help from a sex therapist but "ultimately seduced her." Whu???? You've got to give him credit for that. I mean come on. I'm a pretty notorious seducer* and even I can't imagine doing that. Of course he's got the advantage of being a rock star and I don't so... Hmmm. Maybe I COULD do that if I was a rock star. *looks for his kazoo and starts practicing*

3) And lastly, it mentions that in the numbers department Gene Simmons from Kiss has him beat because Gene slept with 4.897 women. This ruined it for me because I can't stand Gene Simmons. I've asked women if they're attracted to Gene Simmons and everyone of them is totally grossed out.

I remember hearing him interviewed on Stern years ago and it came up that many women say they are repulsed by him but then he kind of puts them under a spell. I'm not buying that. I can see Mick doing that because women find him charming but Gene Simmons is such a creep that I think only women that like him in the first place would do him. Am I right? Am I? Here he is:

And please chime in as to whether you would do either of them. In the their prime and now. Show your work.

*Oh yes I am!

Question About Springsteen Song Sandy. Spectrum. 1975.

I was listening to "Sandy" by Bruce Springsteen on my Ipod the other day. Man does he set a mood and paint a picture in this song! Here's a live version from 1975. I only saw him once in concert. At the Spectrum in Philly in probably 1980 or 1981. Probably in my top 5 favorite concerts ever.

Not sure why Bruce is wearing that big ass wool cap at a concert though.

Now I wish I was at the shore. Snuggling up with a lady fwend.

And what does he mean that "the cops finally arrested Madame Maria for telling fortunes better than they do?" Can anyone explain? I don't understand. Why did she get busted?

Enjoy:

Deadheads Vs Parrot Heads. Which Are More Annoying.

I'll start by saying that I've seen both the Grateful Dead (three times) and Jimmy Buffett (two times) and had a great time at the concerts. And I've always had fun in the parking lot. PAAARRR-TAAAYY!

With that said, both hardcore Dead Heads and Parrot Heads annoy the hell out of me. The whole "look at me! I'm embracing this and I'm a part of the scene!" just gives me a major rash.  And I hate self proclaimed Deadheads or Parrot Heads that have to let you know, "I'm a total parrot head. I've been to 21 shows. I know every song." I don't give a s*%t buddy. So who is more annoying and why? Show your work.

Also, bonus points if you can name any other band follower names. By the way followers of Clay Aiken are called "Clay Nation."

 (Look at that dude above. Arrogant nerd!)

Song Memories. Nazareth. Love Hurts. ELO. Huge Bulge. Peirce Middle School.

Some songs of my youth and their memories. What are your memories of these?

Nazareth - "Love hurts" - When this song comes on I always think of a seventh grade dances and being to shy too ask a girl to dance. Standing in the corner...yearning.....But looking back why would they play this song as a dance song anyway? NOW who looks stupid? Depressing.



ELO - "Turn to Stone" - This reminds me of 8th grade. Hicknut - this kid in the neighborhood  - liked this chick named Maria and he would change the lyrics to "Turn to stone...when Maria was gone...." Oh and always claimed girls were trying to get a glimpse of his "huge bulge." Yeah OK Hicknut.



James Brown - "Sex Machine" - No great memory here other than I love this song and I have it on a CD called Funky Stuff. Check out my man's suit!

Hello Ancestors. Stereo From Ninth Grade. Sound Design.

Hello my future ancestor's. This is your great, great, great grand pappy Dr Zibbs. I see you've found my blog.... Step inside and find out who I was. Or perhaps you're about to have me regenerated and you want to learn a bit about me so you can have something to talk about when I come to? Is that it?

Wouldn't that be great if you found stuff that your great, great, great grand pappy wrote? Well mine will know me because I might have my blog address written on my tombstone so all my future relatives that mourn can see what I was all about. Not really. I'm being cremated. Not sure if I'll get a tombstone. Come to think about it I probably should. Maybe I'll have a monitor on it that flashes my hundreds of blog posts up so people walking by can read it. ...Hey! get back to work groundskeeper and stop reading my blog!

So I think I'm going to start mixing in things from my past for the people of the future to see. So they can see how I lived. And how I played.

Like for example that stereo above? That's the exact stereo I got in ninth grade. The brand is a Sound Design. It was the most expensive stereo in 1979. OK not really. I was kind of embarrassed by the name of it but it did rock.

How do you people of the future listen to your music? 

This IS My Cup of Meat. Manfred Mann. Year 2525.

Manfred Mann from 1968 doing The Mighty Quinn. I never heard a lisp in this song till now. Trippy man. Trippy.



And here's a song I always thought was stupid. In the Year 2525 by Zager and Evans. Who?



And I'll end the Trifecta with a cheesy one. Billy Don't Be A Hero. Remember this one? And look at the drummer. He's all excited. And talk about a weird facial expression on the lead singer. Jeez. Looks like he's in pain.

Meatloaf Lookalike Looks Nothing Like Meatloaf.

"Hey. What's up? My name's Bert McGrath and as you can plainly see, I'm a Mealoaf impersonator. You can tell that by my weight, my ratty ass wig I got at a dollar store and my kerchief that I'll use to wipe off my sweat when I sing "Two Out of Three Ain't Bad" at your BBQ, party or bridal shower. Oh. *winks* And I got an attitude and sex appeal to boot as you can clearly see."

That my friends is a real Meatloaf impersonator. I found the picture on my desktop but I forget where I found it online. Is there anyway he can be really good? I bet you anything I can do a better impression of Meatloaf. I do it all the time in my car when Meatloaf songs come on. I always grab a tissue to use as my prop for wiping my fake sweat.

True story bitch asses. OK. Now back to looking at his picture.

Star, Star. Rolling Stones. Sexy Lyrics. Don't Be Shy.

Oh dear.  Star, Star from the Rolling Stones from Goat's Head Soup. Listen as you read the saucy lyrics. Try not to blush. If you get nervous hide behind a hand fan and take a sneak peak.




Baby, baby, I've been so sad since you've been gone
Way back to New York City
Where you do belong
Honey, I missed your two tongue kisses
Legs wrapped around me tight
If I ever get back to Fun City, girl
I'm gonna make you scream all night

Honey, honey, call me on the telephone
I know you're movin' out to Hollywood
With your can of tasty foam
All those beat up friends of mine
Got to get you in their books
And lead guitars and movie stars
Get their toes beneath your hook

Yeah, you're a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
Yeah, a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
Star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star

Yeah, I heard about you Polaroid's
Now that's what I call obscene
Your tricks with fruit was kind a cute
I bet you keep your pussy clean
Honey, I miss your two tone kisses
Legs wrapped around me tight
If I ever get back to New York, girl
Gonna make you scream all night

Yeah, you're a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/r/rolling-stones-lyrics/star-star-lyrics.html ]
Yeah, a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
Star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker star
Yes you are, yes you are, yes you are

Yeah, Ali McGraw got mad with you
For givin' head to Steve McQueen
Yeah, you and me we made a pretty pair
Fallin' through the silver screen
Honey, I'm open to anythin'
I don't know where to draw the line
Yeah, I'm makin' bets that you gonna get
John Wayne before he dies

Yeah, you're a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
Yeah, a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
A star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star

Yeah you are, a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
A star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
A star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star

Yeah, a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star
Star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker
Star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star, yes you are, yes you are

And here's a live version from 74:

A Question About Two Different Songs. Leo Sayer.

I have a few questions here about these two songs. I heard both in the car earlier. The first is for the song "It Never Rains in Southern California." The lyric says "it never rains in California" but then goes on to say, "but girl  don't they warn ya. It pours. Man it pours."

Which is it? Wikipedia says the song is about the struggles of of an aspiring singer. Does "it pours" means something is hard? Or it pours as in when things get bad they get worse like "when it rains it pours?" Here's the song:



Next questions are for the song "Long Tall Glasses" AKA "I Know I Can Dance" by Leo Sayer. First question:      What do you think he danced like once he started dancing? Was he really good or did he just THINK he was good?

Second question: *said in the voice of a grumpy old man* Why the hell is that jackass making all those motions and God damn faces while he's singing? He looks like an idiot!"