Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Ugly Christmas Sweaters. How Do People Not Know? Walmart.

Do you know when you Google: "Ugly Christmas Sweater" or even "Christmas Sweater Walmart" you get pages and pages of people making fun of ugly Xmas sweaters?

So I ask you this: Why are there still people (mostly women over 40) wearing tacky ass Xmas sweaters? How don't they know? It's like people that have mullets. Don't they know that everyone thinks they look like a fool? I think there should be a website where you can submit a photo of yourself and what you wear and professionals can tell you if you look like an asshole.

And I would like to see video of people picking out these sweaters. Holding them up to themselves. Turning sideways. Looking in the mirror. "I think there should be seven reindeer. Six just looks weird." Do they walk to the counter to pay with pride? Excited to wear the sweater? Bragging to the cashier, "It was only $12,99."

And on the subject of Xmas and having no taste I'll give you a tip for decorating: Less is more. And inflatables? Don't put them on your lawn like this dude in my neighborhood that has ten of them. Snoopy, Santa, turning carousel... Knock it off!

14 comments:

Dr Zibbs said...

I know some of you have inflatables.

Choleesa said...

Inflatables dont even count as decoration....
I have a strange hard on for crazy Christmas sweaters....I do not own one, but I am fascinated with them, and I do stop, and pick them up, and hold them against me, and I state how cute it would look with my skinny jeans and black Dr. Martins...
I cannot explain it, it just is.

Dr Zibbs said...

Choleesa haha! Whenever i see someone wearing one i need to stare and examine it. Taking the design in.

Just Keepin It Real, Folks! said...

Crazy enough, my friend looked everyone for an ugly Christmas sweater this year to wear to an ugly Christmas sweater party but came up empty handed. Good thing my Mom has bad taste and gives me one every year for Christmas. I'm always good for a loaner.

Dr Zibbs said...

Just keepin it real - post a picture!!

Happy Mommy said...

I always Just assumed that their grandkids bought them the sweater. I know I look ridiculous decked out in the things my kids buy for me, but I go out in public with out a second thought in all kinds of nutsy outfits and accessories.

Dr Zibbs said...

Happy momma i think they buy them for themselves. But lets see the outfits your kids buy for you.

middle child said...

I hate those inflatable decorations. I know. To each his own but at least keep the damn things inflated the whole time. I mean, am I the only one who sees them as crumpled laundry on the front lawn during the day?

Furtheron said...

What's wrong with that jumper... just like the one I'm wearing now... ;-)

Dr Zibbs said...

Middle child - my kids and i call them xmas sadness.

Furtheron - yeah but it looks good on you.

Cora said...

Oy. My mom has sweaters like that. So did my grandma. Christ, I hope it's not a genetic thing! If you ever catch me wearing one in my old age, slap me. Please.

Dr Zibbs said...

Cora i just checked. It is genetic.

diane said...

Merry Christmas Jim.

Dr Zibbs said...

Diane you too!