Friday, June 13, 2008

Jesus Tells West Whiteland Man To Continue Taking Extra Wing

The following is true life story that actually happened to That Blue Yak Marketing Manager Ted Murphy:

First off, let me tell you that the wings at the Downingtown Wegmans are downright delicious. You can get 10 wings for $6,99. You get to pick from several styles including BBQ, Teriyaki, Southern style and more. It's a self serve so a few months ago it became a bit tempting to "accidentally" put an 11th wing in the box. My crime went unnoticed 5 times.


In addition to my eyes being bigger than my stomach and not being able to finish the wings AND thinking what I was doing might be wrong, I decided last week to even things out be getting only 9 wings.
Feeling like a saint, I went to my car to eat the wings. I threw my tie over my shoulder so it wouldn't get in the food. Then I lined my lap with paper towels because I'm such a messy eater that I need to take major precautions so I don't get food all over myself.

The carnage began. The wings were as tasty as ever and I ate them carefully as I drove over to the Home Depot across route 30. I spilled not a single heavenly drop of sauce on myself which was a miracle. I parked the car and reached for the extra napkins that I thought were in my car. To my horror, I was out of napkins and my hands were completely caked with sauce and the sticky teryaki sauce. It looked like I'd been having a catch with sticky buns. I tried to wipe some of the gook off with tissues but the tissues stuck like feathers to tar.

I decided that I'd have to walk briskly to the bathroom to clean up. My fear was that if I ran into someone and they put their hand out to shake I would have to say, "Oh, I can't shake - See? My hands are completely covered with sauce and tissues."

I arrived in the bathroom, turned on the water and this is the image that stared back at me:



I think we can all take this as a signal from Jesus that he was punishing me for taking 9 wings. I don't know why he wants me to return to taking 11 wings but I will have to follow his orders. He is Jesus after all.

6 comments:

BBQB said...

You wear a tie to work?

Dr Zibbs said...

Very strict dress code here at the Yak. During the Summer though we do have one "50's Day" and one "Crazy Hat day".

LYDIA said...

This was ALMOST my birthday post. Now I gotta look and see if you wrote on my birthday.

westchesterdead said...

Dude, I think I know who you are, based on the underside of the tie, the style of the shirt, and the belt buckle. I'm a low resolution digital image forensics expert, btw, having served as technical advisor for the mirror/picture scene in Bladerunner.

Caffeine Court said...

The lord works in mysterious ways...

Irenelikewhoa said...

I can pinpoint exactly where ur nipples are!