I give you...a portrait of me. It's from 4th grade.
I was out in Chicago with my cousins for a few weeks in 4th grade and we were at this restaurant called the Magic Pan. And some black arty fartsy dude kept looking at me. Then I noticed he was sketching me. After about 10 minutes he approached our table and said, "Excuse me. I was admiring this young boy. He has a very magical quality to him. A very magical boy. And I would like to present this sketch to you."
He hands the sketch to my Aunt Mollie.
I'm thinking, "FINALLY! Someone has finally realized that I'm magical!"
My Aunt hands him a ten and say thanks. He walks away and she says, "That's what they do in the city Jimmy. They draw your picture then you feel guilty so you have to give them money or you look cheap. It's just another form of panhandling."
Well, thanks for popping THAT bubble. Well, for a few seconds I felt magical so at least I got that.