Saturday, May 16, 2009

Chester County Hospital 2009 May Festival And Special Shoes.

I thought today was the Chester County Hospital May Festival but it's actually May 26. Which is perfect. Because I was thinking about going there, getting in the moon bounce and then putting on these:



They're aerator shoes.

Then as the deflation of the giant moon bounce begins the screams of joy will turn to screams of horror. Parents will frantically pull through the folds of the still flapping rubber looking for their children.

Someone will drop to their knees and scream, "Why??"

Just as the last child is pulled from the wreckage I will emerge from what's left of the moon bounce wearing my fancy ass aerator shoes. Everyone will look at me with confusion and anger at which point I'll get all pissed and innocently say,

"WHAT????....(looking around) WHAT?? I thought that....Oh forget it!"

Then I'll stomp away all pissed off.

28 comments:

sybil law said...

That is freaking awesome!!!
Hahahaha
:D

Suburbia Steph said...

Could I borrow them when you're done permanently scarring children for life? I have some people I'd like to kick in the face with those.

Dr Zibbs said...

Sybil Law - thanks and welcome to TBY

Steph - not only will I give them to you but since I like you so much I'll have them converted into pumps.

HelpMakeCents said...

Make sure to also wear dark clothing and a ski mask. That way, they'll NEVER see it coming. No, sir.

Dr Zibbs said...

HelpMakesCents - I was thinking of disquising myself as a clown.

Dr Zibbs said...

....a clown named Bubbles.

Suburbia Steph said...

Gee, thanks!

Holy shit, a clown! You'll have those kids slitting their wrists!

Cora said...

Hey! My kid actually was in one of those things when it collapsed a few years ago. It was one of the huge ones with a slide and everything. Was that YOU?!

Some Guy said...

Could you imagine if we combined our annoying forces? We could rule the world! Or at least annoy the hell out of a lot of people.

Kat said...

Oh I can just imagine the angry villagers on your lawn with torches and pitchforks now...

The Jules said...

I thought they were massage shoes for walking on fakirs.

Chris said...

Just carry a camera with you and say you're the Pop-arazzi.

Jeez, I crack myself up.

You could probably cover the whole birthday party circuit over a long weekend.

Dr Zibbs said...

Some Guy - I'll draw up a business plan.

Mr. Condescending said...

Zibbs that's mean! And incredibly fun sounding!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

LOL--that would be funny... unless of course I was there, then I would be pissed and probably drop kick you from ruining my children's entertainment while I laze around doing nothing!

K if you are a clown you're going to scare not only the kids but the adults... Clowns freak me out cause my sister watched IT by Stephen King when i was 8 or 9...

Ruined watching re runs of that game show BOzO the clown... and I LOVED that show...

sigh

will you get it on video??? :)

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

And no worries... you TOTALLY top me with comments... so you ARE officially a comment WHORE! :)

Peggy said...

I would kill to see that! I would just love to crack a beer sit on a bench nearby and watch it all go down.

A girl can dream right?

Samsmama said...

Peggy, I'll be waiting on the bench for you.

But for the sake of drama, I will drop to my knees and yell,

"Won't somebody PLEASE think of the children?"

Dr Zibbs said...

Shelle-Blok - thanks for BOTH comments.

Peggy - If I don't have plans that day I'll do it at two sharp. So get your plane tickets now.

jessica o said...

Dr. Zibbs, I think it's important to wear appropriate shoes for every occasion. I applaud your choice. These shoes are perfect for bounce house parties, walking on eggshells and taking traditional Japanese tea.

Chaka said...

Those moon bounce containment fields have always bugged me. I'd love to see that.

The Lush Ess said...

Hey...I want to get some of those shoes and plant some grass in my back yard!!! I've the shittiest looking yard in my neighborhood!!!

I'm scared of bounce houses, though...so I'll be no where near when you go a poppin'?

ÄsK AliCë said...

I freaking hate clowns. What kind of person dresses up in clothes far too big for themselves, paints craploads of makeup all over their faces and goes around "entertaining" (read: scaring) young children?

Well, I guess other then Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen that is.

ÄsK AliCë said...

Oh yes, and also, the shoes are formidable - can you get them in pink?

Fancy Schmancy said...

Make sure you get it on video so we can laugh at the horrified children over and over and over.

~E said...

You should emerge from the moon bounce holding a delicate yellow flower in your hands. Perhaps a daisy?

That way it lessens the impact of the carnage you just performed.

Or makes you look simple...either way, good stuff!

Bambi said...

GREAT PLAN, can I borrow your aerator shoes? I dont have grass at my house (not the good kind) but those things look fun!

blissfully caffeinated said...

You're sick in the head.

And I mean that in the best possible way.