Paaaartayyy!! Crazy Weekend Highlights At Penn State.

I usually hate walking into a bar with friends when it’s wall to wall 21 year olds. We usually just turn around because you feel like an old fart*. Usually …..

The exception was this past weekend. I went up to Penn State with a few friends to see a band. The band we were supposed to see was on Saturday at 9:30 so we thought we’d go into town and “walk around, maybe see if there’s a Penn State sporting event happening so we ‘stay out of trouble during the day’”, as Bill said. Well THAT didn’t happen.

As we drive into town we see hundreds and hundreds of college kids walking around wearing green. It turns out there’s an event called “State Patrick’s Day” and it’s a HUGE all day party.

So we park our car near the fraternity that my two friends went to and decide to go inside. We walk in the door – this is at 12:30 in the afternoon - and there are literally 200 drunk college kids in the frat house. DJ blaring music. People dancing on tables. A dude passed out drunk on the couch. Another dude walked past me, tripped up the steps and fell into the wall head first.


The dude in the hat on the table is my main man

Basically. It’s insane. It’s what you’d expect at 2 AM on New Year’s but it’s barely past noon.

Now here’s where it gets really nuts. We of course stand out like sore thumbs because we’re not wearing green. AND we’re the age of their Dad’s. Or their really, really, really, really older brothers. So they start coming up to us and ask who we are. My friend’s says, “Alumni.” As soon as they say that everyone goes crazy, “What? You are? Let’s parttttyy!” And we basically become celebrities. Everyone wants to party with us. People randomly come up to meet us. We’re laughing our asses off at the absurdity of what’s happening. The entire time laughing and saying, “Is this really happening?”

We roam upstairs and there are people in every room. We get high fives from everyone as we walk own the hall. We’re handed random bottles to drink from as we pass. We walk into an upstairs game room. 30 heads look at us in shock. Bill says loudly, “Don’t worry, we’re not cops. We’re alumni.” The crowd cheers.

I could go on and on about some of the crazy things but it would make for a really long post. (Plus I likes to keep private). Two highlights were that four lovely ladies came up to us and said, “Can we party with you?”

“Well of course you can my dears.” And we proceeded to not only party….but Par-TAY** Here they are***:



The other really crazy thing was that two curvy coeds (sounds hot huh? Trust me…it was) pulled me out on the dance floor to shake it. Being a good sport I went out to shake my groove thang. And we’re dancing. Then they’re dancing around me. Slinking really. Then they both start bending over and start GRINDING on me. Just as I’m about to grab the hips of the one I remember what my one friend said earlier, “Could you imagine if the cops raided this place and the first thing they see is us? With all these underage kids?” Reality sets in and I exit the dance floor. Seconds before I was violated.

Well that’s all I’ll get into here but it was a craaaazy weekend. And I honestly came THIS close to getting up on the main dance table but thought, what if I slip off and break a hip? Buzzkill.

* Plus they’re not mature enough to really grasp my sophisticated ways.
** Whatever THAT means.
*** God Dyyyyyyaaaaaaammmmn!!

Why Do I Have To Get The Ultimate Deal On Everything? Ipods.

One of quirks is that I always have to get the ultimate deal on things I buy. Here are a few examples:

Trek Road Bike-
- Cost to buy new: $1300
- My cost: $350
- I found it advertised in the paper. The guy only rode it a few times.

Weber Grill-
- Cost to buy new: $700 with all of the accessories (including the rotisserie)
- My cost: $200
- Found ad in the paper. The people used it three times but were moving to
Florida and they didn't want to bring it for some reason.

Craftsman Riding Mower
- Cost to buy new: $1300
- My cost: $350
- Found it at a garage sale. Super rich Dad bought for his son that wanted to start a lawn cutting business but then the kid "got lazy."
(The sad thing with this purchase is that I have eight huge maple trees in my yard with roots so it actually took longer to cut the lawn with the rider. So I gave it to my Dad)

It's great to get deals on big ticket items but it seems that I do that for everything. I guess I'm always afraid that I'm going to see it cheaper somewhere else then I'll dwell it.

The problem is that I used to spend so much time researching stuff to get the best deal I was spending a ridiculous amount of time. Hours and hours. So I've really been trying not to do it anymore.

So last night on Ebay I bought the 160G Ipod. Because my Ipod just broke. It cost $214.99. I barely researched this product. I didn't spend hour comparing to see if I could get it cheaper. I just did the "Buy it now".

It should arrive in a few days. And I'm hoping that it's perfect because if it's not, Ima be pissed. And of course go back to analyzing every purchase.

Please say a prayer.

MUST SEE. Peter Wolf And Shelby Lynn Rock Tragedy.

One of the best concerts I saw back in the day was the J Geils Band. Because Peter Wolf is one of the best front men. He's a crazy man.

Here's the song Tragedy from his new album. It's Shelby Lynn and Peter Wolf rehearsing it and it STILL sounds great. Tell me this song doesn't give you chills.

I just heard that he's going to be at The Note in West Chester. I think I may have to go.

Kimba Calms My Nerves. It's Like Rosebud. Crazy.

Does anyone remember Kimba the White Lion? It was a cartoon from days of old.

When I play this, it really brings me back to a time when I never had any worries. When I was four. It just calms me. If I ever become a mental patient maybe they should play this song on a loop in my room. That and the Carpenters.

If you're over four and reading this blog I'm afraid to tell you that after the age of four....your life will be filled with worry. Sorry to break the news to you.

The good news is that there's always the Kimba song. Enjoy.

What The Hell?! Some Dude Is Driving Down West Chester Pike On Tire Rim!

So this morning I'm driving down West Chester Pike which is a pretty busy road. I hear this weird scraping. I look in front of me and some dude was driving down the road with no driver side back tire.

He was driving on the metal rim!

So I drive up next to him to take a picture so I can tweet it. Then I honk so I can tell him that he's a dumbass - and he's driving on his rim. But he doesn't look over at me. Then I just start laughing my ass off thinking about what the cop is going to say to him. So I get in front of him and slow down. He actually passes me. I started to follow him but I had to be somewhere but I'm dying to know if he made it do his destination or if he got pulled over.

Has anyone ever seen anything like this? Do you think he knew he was driving on the rim or he was just ignoring my honks? He did look like he was on drugs.

Dream Machine That Someone Should Invent. Mexican Gang.

I've always had really weird dreams. So weird that I think some people think I'm just making it up when I tell them.

I wish someone would invent a machine that could be hooked up to someones brain and record their dreams. Then you could watch them like you're watching TV. If they did, here's what you could have been watching if you were tuned to the Dr Zibbs Dream Channel last night:

I was in Mexico and I was trapped in a car. I couldn't get out because these dogs were trying to attack me. The dogs finally left and I was able to get out.

Once out of the car though, this gang approached me and they said they were going to kill me. They walk away to prepare themselves and this weird guy approaches me and tells me that I (like him) have the ability to transform into any creature thus helping me defend myself against the gang that's going to kill me.

So the weird guy says, "You can change..just like this"...

He spins around and all of a sudden he looks like Santa Claus. But a disheveled Mexican Santa. Proudly he says, "You see, when the gang comes back, do you really think they're going to want to kill Santa? .....Thinks about it."

I remember thinking.."What the hell?"....

Then I woke up. True story.

Blogger Shows Video To Explain Eagle Dream.

Remember the other day when I was telling you about the dream I had and I was hanging out with these giant eagles? Well check this out:



OK, did you see that goat that the eagle picked up? Now look at that goat's head. That's the size of ME in the dream - compared to the eagle. I told you it was a weird dream.

I'm serious.

What Am I Peculiar? One Flew Over Better Video Clip.

So when I put the clip up the other day from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, this is the clip I should have put up.

Chris from Some Guy's blog posted this in the comments section the other day. This is the clip where Harding is talking about his wife and form and content and heaven and hell...and things get peculiar. This may be one of my favorite scenes in any movie.

Jack Nicholson. Oscar. Cuckoo's Nest. World Series.

So it's Oscar Night 2009. One of my favorite movies ever is One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Here's a clip of the 1976 winner of the Oscar for Best Actor - Jack Nicholson.

This is the scene where he tells the nuts that he's gonna lift the sink and throw it out the window so he can go down to a bar and sit down and wet his whistle and watch the World Series.



And if anyone can recommend some good movie sites - other than IMDB , Rotten Tomatoes and Metacritic - let me know.

I'm Totally Picking a Dance Off Fight This Weekend

When I get pissed, instead of using fisticuffs, I use the good ole fashioned clodhoppers -that's right. Me feet. Because this weekend, I'm having my bad ass a dance off. Forget Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights, Footloose, Singing in the Rain, Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo - this gonna be an all out dance off war!

I'm gonna start by getting my old gang back together, the Zibbs Tip Taps. We broke up years ago years ago after one our lead dance fighters got a $13 per hour job at the factory - which was a lot back then. But I'm gonna track everyone down and get them back together:

- Heel Toe Heel Toe Tony

- Mel "The Human Helicopter" Morris

- Rob Ott

- "Twinkle Toe Twinkle Ho" Harry

- Leo the Tard

and the rest of the gang that wears green, doesn't have many lines and stands in the background and usually gets injured or killed early in the fight.

HOLY CRAP, SOMEONE'S COMING. CHECK BACK LATER!!!