I love festivals and fairs but the kind I don't like is a Renaissance Faire. Like the PA one that's now going on.
And it's not that I don't like the Renaissance. I do. I just don't like bad actors approaching me and talking in a terrible Old English accent and I'm supposed to play along.
It's like when a dude in a costume - like the Bee from radio station B101 wants to high-5 me. It's a dude in a bee costume. I ain't playing along you dick.
One time I was in a supermarket and I was really hungover and I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around and guess who it was? The fucking Bee. And he was just standing there waving at me. So I just go, "What's up?". Then turned back around. So there's been bad blood between the two of us ever since I guess.
That is all.
Oh, yeah. One more thing. Look at the dude in the picture gnawing on the turkey bone. Repulsive. And you know he's all, "Oh my King this turkey leg hath to be the most splendid tasting bird in all the land!"