Thursday, September 4, 2008

Important Internet Blogger Donates Time For Word Generation


There is a campaign to eliminate the use of a certain word from usage in our language. I stumbled upon it today. I think it's time that everyone make the pledge. That's when I'll proudly step in and give the world five new choice replacements. A synonym if you will. And you can trust me that I just won't replace the first letter with a "W". That would be too easy.


To see the word, and imagine my reaction when opened the page, click the words: What if we say it in a funny way though?

(and 5 points to the first reader that understands how the picture relates to the story)

28 comments:

CrotchPains said...

This was easy--you wish to eliminate the use of the word "retard" from polite conversation. Of course, the elevator panel links us back to the Chris Burke blog that totally expolited and mocked those who are retarded, but I'm glad you've seen the error of your ways. Now about my 5 points....

The Guv'ner said...

Oh come on, retard is a funny word when not actually applied to a REAL retard. It is. Truly!

That photo of the elevator buttons is retarded as there's no number 13. I hate when buildings have no 13th floor. It's like the elephant in the room. You go to the 14th floor and everyone KNOWS it's really the 13th. Just calling it something else doesn't make it so. RETARDED.

No?

BeckEye said...

Oh yeah, that's your elevator to hell in the photo.

I vote for "Zibbsian" as an appropriate replacement for the r-word.

BeckEye said...

I love that one of your readers is named "Crotchpains." Fantastic. Why doesn't he/she have a blog?

Tony Spunk said...

When I was a tiny boy I called tards "Noo-noos" There was a noo-noo in my neighborhood in Henderson named Billy Chadwick and Billy Chadwick enjoyed two things only. Shitting on the sidewalk and singing Toto songs. True story.

poobomber said...

I *NEVER use the 'r' word.

I think it's a beautiful example of how retarded our society becomes that we need a retarded website campaign to get rid of the word 'retard'.

*=except all the frikking time!

Falwless said...

There was a noo-noo in my neighborhood in Henderson named Billy Chadwick and Billy Chadwick enjoyed two things only. Shitting on the sidewalk and singing Toto songs. True story.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA


Seriously, though, I am so sick of people getting offended by every little godforsaken thing in the universe. Heaven forbid we hurt anyone's feelings or cause anyone to (GASP!) laugh at themselves.

As Words Words Words put it so eloquently long ago, (you know, I'm always stealing what he says), "I'm offended by people who get offended."

And that's all I gotta say about that.

Gwen said...

Who's this Important Internet Blogger you speak of? Did you write this so we'd all say retard? Have you picked me as your running mate yet? Do I ask too many questions? What are you having for dinner?

The Imaginary Reviewer said...

In England in the 1980s the Spastics Society changed their name to Scope in a bid to stop people using the word 'Spastic' as an insult. We didn't lose a word, we gained one. And it was Scoper.

katrocket said...

I don't understand what they're complaining about. Retards have never been more popular.

kirby said...

What about the phrase flame retardant, am I still allowed to use that word? Have you ever seen the look on a clerks face when you ask for a pair of flame developmentally delayed pajamas? They look at you like you're a ... oh god damn it!

Falwless said...

hahahahaha kirby

180/360 said...

I'm sorry, but I could never give up this word.

Philly said...

still laughing at Kirby's comment

#1

S t a c i said...

Sofa King.

Maybe you've seen this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wNcXVlg3OQ

Anonymous said...

Maybe we don't have to say anything.

Try this:
-Look your friend in the eye.

-Maintain eye contact while turning you head downward and sideways.

-At the same time, ball your hand into a fist while bending your elbow and bringing your forearm to your chest.

-Make Nunnngh sound similar to monster in Young Frankinstein.

See, problem solved.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

speaking of Billy Chadwick, when a mentally challenged individual takes a shit, is that called a "returd"?

H said...

Oh dear lord...the comments are killing me.
To add another story...both of my nephews are special needs. They are both intelligent kids but probably a grade behind their peers. Anyway, growing up my younger bro (the boys father) and I loved the movie Sixteen Candles. Remember the scene where grandpa is calling the police about losing the "Donger"? And after his description he listens and says "no, he's not retarded". Well whenever the boys do or say something a little off my bro looks at me and repeats that line. What's my point? Well if he can say it so can I.

But I prefer to call people Wiitards.

M@ said...

That's a nice sentiment but most people only use that word in reference to people WITHOUT disabilities....

I want it to be OK to use the N-word in reference to other white people.... When I enter a room, the first thing I want to know is how all my N*&^&#@s are doing.

ÄsK AliCë said...

You guys are a bunch or retards

Whiskeymarie said...

A guy I work with called a student a "fucking retard" and got sent to sensitivity training.
He didn't deserve it.

The guy was a fucking retard.

Since I'm swearing here, I like "fucktard" as well as "dewtard"- a reference to the beverage of choice of non-developmentally-disabled tards the world round.

CDP said...

I can't believe that Whiskeymarie didn't include one I learned from her: "Hotard" (long "o"). One of my favorite words now.

r cubed said...

and now rcubed doesn't seem like such a good name

Distributorcap said...

i am dyslexic - what is a drater? is that someone who is retarded?

i am puzzled

Leonesse said...

I have been chastised by a 14yr old on how rude it is to say. I love RETARD. It doesn't mean what I think they think it means.

MelO said...

ooh! ooh! I know! I know! (waving raised arm anxiously)

The picture isn't 'retarded'... lol... I think you were going for the 13th chromosome aspect. Yes, the elevator is missing the 13th floor. Although, don't the... a-hem... disabled have an EXTRA 13th chromosome?

NOW who's got the five points?! And where exactly do I redeem them?

Dr Zibbs said...

Crotchpains wins 5 points

MelO said...

Oh now that's just RETARDED