I bet the parents of my neighbor's Hicknut and Dukey had this conversation with them:
"Kids. We have an announcement. Your mother and I have been thinking of a way we can show that we don't love you. Instead of the obvious abuse or neglect we've decided to get more creative and simply declare this house a SHASTA* HOUSE! That's right. Only Shasta soda for you and your friends."
Man that stuff was God awful. So when I went to their house to play Intellivision or go on their CB radio I was forced to drink Shasta. And it was always warm too. They just sat it in cases next to the fridge. And someone would just rip a hole in the plastic so you had to reach in to get your crappy soda.
We would pour it into these orange plastic cups and plop a few freezer burned ice cubes in.
Oh yeah that helped.
And check out this Shasta commercial. Their selling point is that it doesn't have tons of bubbles like other sodas. Wha wha whaaaaat?? They're bragging that it's stale?
*FUN FACT: Shasta has been around since 1889. The same year as the Statue of Liberty.