Help Me Build The Zibbswich Sammie! Pork Shoulder Sandwich Creation.

If you follow me on Twitter @DrZibbs you might recall that I started to develop a sandwich that I'll be calling the Zibbswich. The early prototype was just OK so here's an updated potential list of ingredients. Feel free to let me know any ingredients that you would add, delete or substitute.

OK. Here we go....

Pork shoulder smoked on grill or slow roasted.
Roll (A seeded one)
Garlic, mushrooms and shallots (saute in oil then deglaze with white wine).
Long hots.
Cheese (but sharp provolone is always used on pork so I think I want something gooey. Any suggestions?)

And the secret ingredient is: ROASTED RED PEPPER SAUCE.

And I'm thinking of adding coleslaw but I don't think that would work.

I might also try a variation where I don't add the roasted red pepper sauce but I had really spicy baked beans to the top. I'm note sure if I've ever seen baked beans on a sandwich. 

Most Delicious and Stinky Kitchen Smells Declared By Chester County Man.

What do you think the most delicious and stinky kitchen smells are? Foodwise that is. Mine are....

Delicious: Shallots and garlic cooking in a pan that is being deglazed by white wine. Oh my God. Heavenly. I love the little shallot. And garlic? Couldn't live without it. And deglazing a pan is probably my favorite kitchen task. Next to eating the food. Awwww yeah...up high *looks around for someone to high five*

Stinkiest: And now on to the stinkiest. I guess for me it has to be sour milk. Except it's rare that I smell it because the day it hits the expiration date it's down the sink with you. You stinky bastard. But on that rare occasion that I've dumped it and lumps come out?....Uhhhggg! Makes me ill!

West Chester Chicken Gives Birth To Orange.

Doctor: Come on Mrs Baulker* you can do it. Just one more push.

Mrs Baulker: I CAN'T!! JUST GET IT OUT OF ME!!!

Doctor: Just a few more pushes. You're crowning. I can see the head...

Mrs Baulker: AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

*orange shoots out and is swaddled in a cloth dinner napkin*...

AAAAND SCENE!

Naaaa. That disgusting scene wasn't a chicken giving birth to an orange. Chickens lay eggs. Not oranges.

That picture is actually an orange that I shove into the inards of a chicken sometime when I cook it. I slice one up and shove it in there. And squeeze some on top. But pretty disgusting image huh?

*rubs carving utensils together*

OK. What can I get you? A leg? Some white meat maybe...?

*Get it? "Baulker?" Like chickens go, "Baulk Baulk Baulk!!!!"

I Love to Saute Onions. Chester County Man Eats Pork.

Oh baby do I love my pork. The problem is that a lot of the pork doesn't have enough fat in it. I always like to make sure mine does. I usually like chops with bones but here are some boneless chops I just made.



Delicious. I just season them with salt, pepper and chili powder and brown them in a pan with some olive oil. Then baked them at 350 till they're done.

Then when they're almost done I throw onions in the frying pan with some more spices and deglazed the pan with some white wine. Scraping off those tasty bit. Oh baby. I love that smell. I think sauteing is my favorite cooking task by the way too.



Then I throw the mixture on the pork and tadaaa! A side of baked beans or potatoes and some applesauce and you're ready to go. And a nice cold beer. Sip... Ahhhhh!

Mir Ham's Vom Sauerkraut. German Cooking Music.

Man if this song doesn't want to make you invade Poland NOTHING will!

OK I'm not kidding here. Sometimes when I cook I love to listen to music that reminds me of the food. Italian cooking? Sinatra and Dean Martin.

BBQ? I'll put on some Southern rock or Country.

German - like a pork roast or what not? I'll put on this album called Folksongs from Bavaria. I really like it. But the sad news? It somehow got deleted from my Ipod! Don't worry. It's still on my external hard drive.

And I'll tell you that my favorite song on it is Mir Ham's Von Sauerkraut. My son and I used to listen to it over and over and laugh because we would always say that the two different dude's doing solos probably hated each other. One was snobby and the other was kinda prissy and making a mockery of the song and having too much fun with it. And we would make up scenarios of their arguments.

I shit you not.

Enjoy. (And there's no official video. The song was taken from a random group of people that put it up from their trip to Germany. Oh. And I'm also part German. So I got that)

The Potholder Story. The Child. Guy's Weekend.

I think my friend "The Child" has to be the ultimate bachelor. A few years ago we were having a guy's weekend at his place in Maryland. Right near the water. A boat. Sweet deal. While a few of the guys were making crabs here's what happened:

Dave: Child where are your potholders?

Child: Right in the drawer below the microwave.

Dave: (opens draw and horrifyingly holds something up) What the hell is this?

Child: What? I use them as potholders.

Dave: YOU USE YOUR OLD UNDERWEAR AS POTHOLDERS???!!

Child: (acting as if Dave is being a big baby) Oh cooooooome on nooooow! Who doesn't use their old clothing for things around the house??

Dave: Yeah maybe an old T-shirt to dry your car not tighty whiteys as potholders!!

I swear this happened. HAHAHA!! I always picture him having a date over and he romantically is making his date dinner and he says, "Would you mind handing me a potholder out of that drawer? And she kind of dreamily reaches for the drawer....."WHAAAAA????"

Sauerkraut And Music To Cook To. Saint Patty's Day. Recipe.

Since I'll be celebrating my Irish heritage all week because of Saint Patty's Day, I embraced my German background by eating German last night. The meal was pork, mashed potatoes and Sauerkraut. And applesauce.

And when I cook, sometimes I like to play the music of the region for which I'm cooking. Here are some standards I'll play from my Ipod:

German Food: Traditional German Music (I forget the name of the album but there's a lot of Polka).

Italian: The Essential Dean Martin.

Cajun: Buckwheat Zydeco

BBQ: Jimmy Buffet, Beach Boys, Springsteen. Usually just at the beginning of Spring when it's starting to get nice out because it reminds me of the shore.

And just writing this reminds me that I really need to start cooking more. I guess I've been in kind of a funk and haven't been cooking much lately but I really need to get back to it. Anyone have any great recipes they think I should cook?

I've been wanting to make the ultimate mac and cheese for a while. Anyone have the ultimate recipe? I'm also looking for a few good fish recipes. One of my favorite simple standard salmon dishes is this:

Salmon Ala' Dr Zibbs

- Rinse salmon and rub with olive oil. Add salt and pepper.
- Rub dijon mustard on top of salmon.
- Sprinkle brown sugar on top of salmon.
- Grill on cedar plank (soak the plank first in water)

Enjoy!

Doesn't Everyone Get Busted By Someone When They're Secretly Miming? Fool.

I got totally busted by my wife yesterday.

You know this post that I put up the other week with David Armand doing mime to the song Torn?

Well I was cooking and the song came on. So of course I started to act out the video. Then the next song on the radio was Billy Joel's "It's Still Rock and Roll to Me". So I started acting it out in the same mime style. Trying to see if I could mime the lyrics.

Well, I thought my wife was in the other room when all of a sudden she appears. I of course stop mid-mime and have a look of horror on my face. It's something I would have done in front of her but just to get busted like that...

My wife started laughing her ass off and can barely get out the words, "What...hahaha...What...hahaha...hahaha...are...hahahaa...you doing"???

Busted! I never get embarrassed in front of my wife but it was a combo of embarrassment and shock that she was standing there.

What a fool.

TBY Product Warning: The Egg Genie. Do NOT Buy This Product!

Do any of you wonder if you may be retarded? Open your cabinet. Did you purchase the Egg Genie?

You did?

Well, you better sit down because I've got something to tell you. Are you ready. You my friend are retarded.

You have to be. I saw the commercial yesterday and the Egg Genie* is the most useless kitchen gadget since the microwave bacon cooker. It claims to cook eggs perfectly. Do you know how I cook eggs perfectly? I use a timer.

I'd like to interview the people that watch this commercial then are convinced that they not only need this but that after a few months they'll actually still be using it.

And one more thing. Who the hell uses soft boiled eggs for Eggs Benedict? Retarded people you say? Case closed.

If you want to see the commercial and featuring the soft boiled Eggs Benedict click here.

*and could you imagine if you received the Egg Genie as a gift? I'd love to see the anticipation on the faces of the people that gave you the gift as they sit there in anticipation, thinking that you're going to open it and be all excited. And they're waiting to yell, "..and it's great for making soft boiled eggs for Eggs Benedict. It's right there on the side of the box!" Then they look around proudly see if anyone else at the party is looking at them and thinking, "Great. Let's pretend you're sick so we can leave. We're going to look like fools when our gift is opened and they see that we only gave them cash. Stupid, non-egg steaming cash".

Crescent Mummy Dogs. Uhh..Nice Try. Halloween Hell.

So I'm flipping through the coupon section of the paper this morning and I see the picture for Crescent Mummy Dogs. You can make them using hot dogs and Pillsbury Crescent Rolls. Here's the picture:

Kind of cute but a bit disturbing on so many levels.

So I'm looking for an image online for the Crescent Mummy Dogs and it seems that a blogger ATTEMPTED to make them.

I hope you're sitting down for this. Here's how they turned out:

WHAT THE HELL? Jesus Christ! Did they get in a fight with a rival crescent mummy gang?

And the funny thing is that the person shows the picture and posts the recipe but they don't say, "OK, this is really not how they're supposed to turn out" or "So my son looked at them, started crying and said 'This is not what the Mummy Dogs are supposed to look like..they're..they're.. DEFORMED!'"

I mean..come on. Just look at them.

Memorial Day Food Thoughts. Chris Elliot Scary And Creepy. TBY

When you're about to bite into your burger, hot dog, chicken or steak today, I'd like you to close your eyes for a minute.

Once your eyes are closed, imagine that the food you are about to eat was prepared by this Chris Elliot character from Scary Movie.

Now open your eyes. Bon Appetit' with TBY creepy video #5.

Various Things Since It's Memorial Day Friday. Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ.

A few things since it's Memorial Day Friday and people are going to be itching to get out of work early.

- For my foreign readers. Do you even HAVE memorial day? And for my American readers will you be sneaking out early? Any good plans for the holiday?

- I was invited to Sea Isle (New Jersey shore) for the weekend - free. I'm not "shore" if I'm going to go. Get it? "shore" instead of "sure"?

- I wonder how soon really good sweet corn will be ready? It's probably going to be a while.

- The helicopters have almost fallen from the eight maple trees in my yard so I may be able to order mulch finally.

- If you're having BBQ this weekend get some Sweet Baby Rays BBQ sauce . I just discovered it recently and it's the best I've ever had from a bottle.

- I declare this the second worst post ever on TBY.

Stewed Tomato and Cheesy Shrimp ala' Zibbs Recipe.

Here's a cheesy dish I'll dub Stewed Tomato and Shrimp ala' Zibbs. Here's how to make it.
(serves 4 or one big fat guy)

Ingredients
4 onions
3 cans stewed tomato
Mushrooms
salt, pepper, paprika, garlic powder, cayenne pepper
1 lb. shrimp
Chicken stock
Olive oil
Cheese. I used velveeta because it's all I had on hand.

Instructions

- Heat skillet to medium high and add olive oil. Season shrimp then cook shrimp for about 1 minute per side. Remove from pan.
- Heat onions until translucent then lower heat to medium and add garlic.
- Add stewed tomatoes, mushrooms and about half cup of stock.
- Lower heat to simmer and cook for about 20 minutes or until shrimp is cooked.
- Add some of the velveeta and stir until nice and smooth. Cheese also thickens the dish so you may need to add a bit more stock if needed.

Velveeta is actually pretty good in this dish but don't use too much. I really only use velveeta as a back up cheese so use any cheese that melts well.

You can then serve this over pasta or rice. I also like to drip Tabasco over it.

Enjoy.

Look At That BBQ Header at the Top of My Blog. Bees!

So everyone is changing the layouts of their blogs these days. I just don't have the patience to do it right now so I simply added the picture you see above. It's an image of me barbecuing on my deck. I then realized there was a bee's nest under the grill. Using my catlike reflexes I screamed like a girl and ran inside to get my electric tennis racket bug swatter* - best invention ever - and went to town on the bees. They didn't stand a chance.

And on the subject of new blog layouts, two of my favorites are the blogs of Whiskey Marie and The Verdant Dude (aka B.E.Earl). I'm very, very jealous. I especially like how The Verdant Dude's blog has the options of tabs that let you have links to other blogs. And I'll add that these are two of my favorite blogs as well.

*Note that there are spikes hanging off of the electric tennis racket bug swatter. These show you that it's been used in many bee battles. They could easily poke out an eye but danger is my middle name. Well, actually "Screams Like a Girl" is my middle name. "Danger" is my Confirmation name.

Bacon Is Everywhere You Look Online

Everywhere you look online you see bacon. I'm not complaining - I'm just pointing it out. On my blogger friend MJenk's blog Crown of Thistles today he's got a great post about bacon. There are bacon products on my sidebar THAT YOU CAN BUY. And I'm sure right now in a store there are people actually buying real bacon. Right now!

With all of this bacon mania, I have a question. Do you think someone, somewhere loves bacon so much they made out with it? Like actually pulled their shades down then put two strips together to look like lips and had a make out session with the bacon? I bet they did.

Man. You people are sick.

Various Thoughts On Cooking Shows

I love to cook and I love to watch cooking shows. Here are a few random thoughts on cooking shows.

Bobby Flay - makes awesome food and is a great instructor. I love the Throwdown. I really miss Grillin' and Chillin' which was one of the first Food TV shows.

The Neely's - annoy the hell out of me. "Oh yeah baby, put some more sugar on that. Just like you - sweatie". Shut up!

Emeril makes some great food but his Schtick makes me sick. The only thing worse than, "BAM" is the reaction that the seals in the audience give him when he mentions he's going to add more garlic. Puuulease. And he better watch it because he's getting tubby.

Rachel Ray? I can't take her anymore.

Alton Brown - I'm almost done with him but his basics of cooking and the science behind cooking keeps me watching. But major nerd.

Guy Fieri - I can't get enough of the Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives Show. He's got a few new good shows now.

Giada De Laurentis -Pretty likeable. Shows are OK. Is it just me or does she have one of the largest head you've ever seen. Pretty sexy though.

Tyler Florence - Excellent. He makes some great stuff.

Aida Mollenkamp - Have no idea when her show is on but she's a feast for the eyes.

Man Vs Food -This is of my new favorite shows. He goes to various places and tries to breat the record for food intake. Kevin Arnold lookalike?

The Barefoot Contessa - I can't watch without thinking about her feet. Therefor, I don't watch.

Gordon Ramsay - He can be a real A-hole but if you can't stand the heat, get the hell out of the kitchen.

There you go.

Thanksgiving Is Gonna Be Way Better This Year

Imagine the horror when I was flipping through the Bed, Bath and Beyond circular and I see this contraption for inserting stuffing into a turkey. It's called a stuffing cage. WHAT THE HELL? Is this is the most obscene food photo you've ever seen? Is there anyway to shove this thing inside a bird without moaning, "Ohhhhh yeahhhhhhh! Owwww. Rub some more butter on my sides - it's too BIG!"

I'll be heading to my inventor's workshop* tonight to put together prototypes for two accoutrements for this turkey cage: Mini Drumstick Cuffs and Tom Turkey Ball Gag. I said it once and I said it before, "I'm gonna be rich!"

*To see one of my other inventions, click here.

West Chester PA Sure Does Know How To Cook

This is just a random picture I found on my computer of a rib eye steak and some fried eggs. I think that's some buffalo mozzarella on top of the steak. It's not a super food glam shot like I see on some food sites but what are you going to do?

If you're looking for some great food related sites here are two that happen to be West Chester based:

KimDec - Kimmie mixes in recipes with her regular posts. Her recipes are great and the photos are so good they could be in Gourmet Magazine. I made a variation of her Chiles Rellenos recipe after seeing the pics on her site.

Barbeque Bachelor - BBQ Bachelor is also a West Chester based food blogger. The next time you want to BBQ anything you really have to use his site for reference. I cook all of the time and visit many food websites when I want to try a new recipe but his is the first place I go when I need a new BBQ recipe. His blog could be made into a best selling BBQ book. Great recipes. Great pictures. Great instructions.

When you visit them, make sure to tell them that I sent you.

West Chester Chili Eaters Practice Maturity

That's right. It's time again for the West Chester Chili Cook Off. Tomorrow - Sunday, October 5. And with chili comes a certain by-product. I remember seeing Blazing Saddles when it came out at the Warner Theater in West Chester and the bean scene with the farting had everyone rolling in the aisles.

We're all older know so I'd like everyone to practice a little maturity by watching this clip with a straight face:

Chester County Mexican Dinner Results? Delicious

So last night was the dinner club I was telling you about. Here are pics of the tasty Mexican food. Chicken enchiladas, beef enchiladas, black beans and asparagus salad. Very Delicious. Margaritas and Coronas were also consumed.

...And for those that want to see a photo of the Chiles Rellenos I made the other night..TA - DAAA. Now go microwave the Big Mac that's in the back of your fridge and eat it while looking at this food. If you use your imagination - maybe.. just maybe.. that Big Mac will taste a little bit better. To add some excitement to your life, prop up a pillow next to your TV tray and pretend you're dining with me...Dr Zibbs.