Thursday, November 26, 2009

Thanksgiving Miracle Planned By Famous Blogger In Downingtown For Old People.




Happy Thanksgiving everybody. On a serious note, I've decided to "give something back" this year.

Get ready to cry.

I was thinking that while I'm eating a turkey dinner today in a home, some sad sacks will be eating at the Downingtown Old Country Buffet. And you KNOW how pathetic that place is.

For what I'm calling "The Thanksgiving Miracle - The Old Country Buffet Rescue of 2009" I will be going there, and picking one couple - probably old people - and inviting them to have Thanksgiving dinner in a home with their "new family".

I will make it very dramatic and heart wrenching by having one of my handlers announce the Thanksgiving miracle that is about to take place via bullhorn. Full volume. That's right, number 10 with deafening feedback volume. People in the Wegmans will be able to hear it.

I'll also add to the drama by saying, "Maybe it's gonna be you!" and point at someone but then point at someone else. Then I'll say, "You. Come up here." They'll get all excited thinking it's gonna be them but I'll say, "I need YOU to read who is going to receive the Thanksgiving miracle. Because it's certainly not going to be you". Yeah. It's gonna be good.

When I pick the couple it really will be a day that they'll never forget.

But I need your help.

We honestly are really short on chairs so I was thinking that one of you could actually take them back to your home for the dinner. Just tell them that I'll meet them there. They won't know the difference.

Great then. Just let me know if you can do it. I'll have them wear red pinnies and stand out front on the stoop.

Have a great Thanksgiving.

11 comments:

Dr Zibbs said...

I just read this again and it's so beautiful I started to cry.

I'm such a giver.

Some Guy said...

You, sir, have a heart as big as a whale. Thank you for all you do!

Dr Zibbs said...

Some Guy - you know I'm very selfless and always help others.

Thanks you.

Real Live Lesbian said...

Dr. Zibbs, such a angel, you are!

We'll do it and even plan a BJ for the old guy. You know it's been forever for him! ;)

Of course, we'll need some hot, straight chicks for the BJs...can you provide those?

katrocket said...

I absolutely refuse to mingle with the elderly, but in the spirit of Giving, I have disregarded the advice of my physician and legal team and visited your blog to leave you this comment.

Enjoy your weekend! Good luck with the old people.

Dr Zibbs said...

Real Live - that can be arranged.

Katrocket - I knew I could get you back here. Thanks for the Thanksgiving wish. Tell a mountie I said hello.

B.E. Earl said...

Are they gonna smell like old people? Then, no.

Eric Lewis said...

My school was handing out free vouchers for meals there today, staff, students and even friends. Not sure how many were going.

Cameron said...

Trying to type thru my sobbing tears of joy....hold on.

...Ok....no, no wait...

..A true humanitarian, that's what you are. You deserve an award, something that signifies your selflessness...hmmm. How bout a moonman?

Gwen said...

I'd love to help you out but I have to wash my hair today. Sorry.

Dr Zibbs said...

Gewn - that is a very fair excuse.