Wednesday, December 2, 2009

A Very Important Message From THAT BLUE YAK. PRESS CONFERENCE.




It is true! I AM the most important person on the internet. Look at all of those comments. It's unheard of. It's gotta be some kind of record.

I was gonna wait until I got 100 comments but I changed my mind. Plus, I don't want to be responsible for any suicides.

Now here is my statement:

If I read the post about me bitching, my response would have been something along the lines of "Stop being a big baby". Which is what many of you wrote. I honestly wrote that post in a minute because I was in a pissy mood. So there you go.

But some of the comments just baffle me.

As for needing validation? Of course I do.

As for writing and not caring who reads it? Hell no. That's like writing something, then printing it out and throwing it in the trash. That's no fun.

But the comment that really blew my mind was from Katrocket.* She wrote:

Why would we want to read a blog that's all about how awesome you think your blog is? You're not very funny. You regularly insult your readers. And obviously you have some weird issues about commenting. That's not very interesting.

I honestly TRIED to figure you out for a while because i saw some potential, but when you sent a bunch of people over to my blog to guilt me into writing comments on YOUR blog, that was the last straw. Now I just think you're a jerk.

Now fuck off or get on with it. The choice is yours.

Really? A dick move is sending readers to your blog to guilt you into commenting? HAHAHA. Why would that bother somebody? Somebody, please tell me. Isn't half the fun of leaving comments saying something goofy? How could someone feel guilted into leaving a comment?

Insulting readers? Of course I do. I often call them peasants or the commoners but who reading this blog would be offended? It's so absurd it makes me laugh.

And saying how awesome my blog is?? It is though. That's exactly what this blog is about. Being a self absorbed, clueless parody. How could anyone not get that after reading a few posts? I don't get it.

And saying I'm not very funny? That's fine. I'm not going to please everyone all the time. I get people saying some posts are too weird and others saying to write more about myself so I'm never gonna please everyone. But I do get lots of comments and emails saying I'm hyterical. So whatever.

Now if you'll excuse me I need to pick up my capes from the dry cleaners.

Let the comments begin.

*and I do truelly hope you keep reading my blog. Perhaps reading it aloud or with a friend would make it funnier. I don't know.

47 comments:

Dr Zibbs said...

Glad to have you back Dr Zibbs.

Signed, your secretary.

Stacey said...

Please feel free to send readers to MY blog(s) to guilt me into commenting on YOUR blog. :)

Stacey (Chef_Stacey)

Former Fat Chick said...

Listen you BIG CRY BABY BITCH, if all I had to do was IGNORE you so that you would send over a SHITLOAD of readers to my BLOG, well, dammit you should have said so! (I am now ignoring you, you jerk) hurry up, ok....

Dr Zibbs said...

Stacey and Former Fat Chick - I will mention both of you in an upcoming post.

Stacey said...

Sa-weet. I look forward to bitching about the additional traffic it brings me.

Peggy said...

You're such a huge dork, I wish you were my brother so I could make fun of you mercilessly at Christmas!
xoxo

ChesterCo_PA said...

Glad you're back, Zibbsy. I really wasn't looking forward to finding you and kicking your ass in my new red boots. You're easy enough to find, but I didn't want to ruin my boots.

Now if you can kindly drive traffic to Abel Pet Supply, I'd appreciate it. I did post 3 times, you know. Don't think I can't go a 4th time either. Or a 5th.

Mr. Condescending said...

you know I have a secret award for the elite with 100 posts, 100 followers and 100 comments.

Josh Almighty said...

I knew you were bluffing cause the yak jumping off the cliff was gray and not blue, and hardly resembled a yak at all, and cause I'm smart.

Chemgeek said...

aaaaaaaaaah! I love the regular distraction that is The Blue Yak. I originally came here for medical advice, but I discovered something so much more important, entertainment.

Wings said...

It's a Christmas miracle!

I think.

Can I at least get some egg nog?

Mr London Street said...

*hits unfollow button*

Kristen said...

I think you could have gotten to 100 in a day easy, but nice to see you back. You can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself.

SkylersDad said...

I'm out.

Pearl said...

I don't know -- I've always found you amusing. But then again, I'm not everyone's cup of tea either.

And what is it with the drop in comments?! Have noticed it myself. I thought it was just me, but maybe it's really you! Did you break the commenters?

Pearl

The Vegetable Assassin said...

I think you expected 100 fawning comments telling you not to go and didn't at all bargain for a smaller amount, a huge percentage of which were from people going "For God's sakes man, get over yourself". You almost pulled it off though, congratulations on trying.

Dr Zibbs said...

Veggie Assasssin - no, not really. I expected what I read.

JenJen said...

I should totally get a prize for bitching at you first.

Yep. PRIZES.

and my word ver:
zygoats.

I get all the good ones. Flutard.

Son of a Thomas said...

Me: "That Blue Yak isn't going to stop."

Wife: "What Blue Yak?"

Me: "That Blue Yak blog."

Wife: "A yak blogs?"

Me: "No some dude, remember, we had lunch."

Wife: "You had lunch with a guy who thinks he's a yak?"

Me: "No I had lunch with doctor Zibbs."

Wife: "Is he helping the guy who thinks he's a yak?"

Me: "Can I buy the shirt?"

Wife: "What shirt?"

AbelPetSupply said...

Kristen, I think Dr Zibbs pleases himself more than you care to know. :P

-ChesterCo_PA

Cora said...

Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez.

Insecure much?

;-)

J. Hi said...

Told you all it was a ploy--suckers.

Now I am announcing that I am ending it all on my blog if you don't go there and comment. ;)

madtexter (corey james) said...

Well, I still think you're as cool as the the bees knees! Keep on doing what you're doing, and if people don't like it...F&##^ 'em!!

B.E. Earl said...

Damn. I was reading too many blogs and I was hoping to tidy things up on my feed reader a bit.

You ruined it.

Dr Zibbs said...

And to think that this pissed people off more than my constant mention of retarded people. What does that say?

Dr Zibbs said...

..and Son of a T - that reminds me of the mug conversation you had with your wife. Classic.

Mr London Street said...

It says that it's okay for you to make jokes about retards much in the same way as it's okay for Chris Rock to make jokes about black people.

Dr Zibbs said...

Mr London Street - Haha. Touche'

Anti-Zibs said...

I guess I'll scrap my plans for now to start my blog "That Almost Blue-But Slightly Gray Yak, to fill the huge void created following your retirement. You can't last much longer - I'll be waiting.

Justme said...

I really don't see where anyone suffered any bodily injury here. What's the big whoo ha about?

Andrew Rodriguez said...

Don't all those microphones look like a bunch of Robot Penises? (Not mine, from Peter Griffin from Family Guy, but apropos) :)

Dr Zibbs said...

JustME - I agree.

Andrew - yes they do.

Anti-Zibs said...

And Anti-Zibs......?? No reply??

JenJen said...

Totally rude you responded to SOME comments and not others.
Is it my name?
My lil profile head?
My too witty comments?
Sigh.
boo.

WendyB said...

I act out all your posts, and they just slay me that way!

WendyB said...

P.S. send lots of traffic to my blog, please!

Dr Zibbs said...

WendyB - I will.

FunnyGal KAT said...

I'm a big fan of people leaving a comment to say they're not reading your blog. So, um, don't. But you obviously just read the blog you are now writing to say you're not reading. You're confused.

ChesterCo_PA said...

Jen Jen, I agree. I feel ignored. I think I'm going to go on strike and stop commenting. I may wait for 100 replies directed to me from Dr Zibbs before I start again.

;)

Michelle said...

Dude calm down. Who cares. You never read or comment on my blog. Do I care?

Grow up but stay young!

Dr Zibbs said...

Michelle - I love you

Dr Zibbs said...

..and Michelle I just went to leave a comment on your blog. Not sure it went through because of the password info. And I've ben drinking.

Michelle said...

It went through. You sat next to a fat man!!

I love you too!

Swedish Chef said...

I still love you pookie bear. Even though you smell like fresh cheese. Christmas parade tonight?! I'll be dressed up, you can't miss me.

Bring liquor.

Dr Zibbs said...

I'll be there. Let me guess. You'll be dressed as an elf?

JMUmonty said...

I hope you mention all of your twitter buddies in an upcoming blog, as you promised certain female twitter peeps in your comments. Otherwise, I'm probably suing for sexism, and I'm gonna hunt you down, and snap a photograph, and then maybe bribe you by threatening to make a run on sentence and asking for money and fortune and some of your fame. But mostly I just like to take pictures, so that's cool.

Dr Zibbs said...

JMUmonty - All in good time.