Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Chester County Man Hoards Napkins. Exton Chipotle. Exton Country Bagel.




The Chipolte napkin. The holy grail of restaurant napkin for napkin hoarders like me. 

Does anyone else hoard napkins? I do it all the time. I store them in my car then and use them for various purposes. Face cleaning, spills, the occasional nose blow when tissues run out, wiping down my dash and console...and maybe someday for origami. Who knows?

And Chipotle napkins are the best because you can grab a huge stack easily and they're thick. My least favorite used to be Wendy's. Do you know why? I just hated that bright yellow color. But they've switched to the same industrial brown as Chipotle so I'll be stocking up on those as well. 

And on other napkin hoarding related news I was in the Exton Country Bagel this morning and too bad my arch enemy wasn't there because as I was pulling their crappy napkins out of their toilet paper holder-like dispensers I was imagining if he were there I would slowly pull one out..and another..and another..and another....staring at him the whole time with the look of "there ain't a damn thing you can do about this little man. Not a damn thing." And as I pulled the 30th napkin out I would look at him and mouth, "Thanks for the free napkins....chump."

Then strut my ass out of their establishment. .......And.......Scene!


10 comments:

Dr Zibbs said...

And I'm surprised there isn't more advertising on napkins. Only a matter of time.

Choleesa said...

My name is Choleesa, and I hoard napkins............in my car, in my purse, in my back pockets (which really sucks when I forget they are in there and then throw them in the washer, where they then become confetti, stuck to every other piece of clothing in the washer.....) Where was I??

Suze said...

You have a vivid imagination. I like hanging out there.

Dr Zibbs said...

Choleesa - In your pockets? Why are you keeping some in your pockets?

Suze - yeah I like to imagine scenarios.

diane said...

This clearly demonstrates that you have entirely too much time on your hands.

Dr Zibbs said...

Diane - I actually have MORE time on my hands. Well...more than time than the people that are constantly looking for napkins. So I gots that!

W.C.Camp said...

I imagined your scene as acted by the infamous 'Mr. Bean'! - Also your napkin lore must include the dispenser so overstuffed with naps that they just tear in chunks from the pressure - I HATE THOSE THINGS!
W.C.C.

E said...

I always have napkins in my glove box, because without them I would be a mess.

Dr Zibbs said...

WC - Ha. Mr Bean. I could see him doing that.

E - glove box.

red.neck chic said...

i head up the napkin hoarders anonymous group here in the redneck hood...

when i say on the daily newsletter: "meeting this week at (insert location here) - bring your own floor cushion"

it never fails... everyone walks in with wads of napkins and a sectional is born...

;) robelyn