Ozzy Osborne. War Pigs. Black Sabbath and TV Stuff.

Many of you may be watching the new Ozzy Osborne Show on the Telly* but check out Ozzy doing War Pigs when he was in Black Sabbath. I was never into Black Sabbath when I was younger but I kind of like them now.

Especially this song. Also, Sharon Osborne is a very attractive woman. Just sayin'.



* I already saw it on the previews but this dude was just making out with an old lady.

Pete's Car Wash IN WC Forces Man To Scream

So on my last post the West Chester food blogger with the great hair that I love Kimmie - (and I'll be meeting her in real life soon) - said I should spend $3 and get my car washed. There's a $3 car wash right on Market Street in West Chester. It's called Pete's Car Wash.

And it's a perfect segway into the the real life picture that is me inside Pete's Car Wash in West Chester.

I'm not lying when I tell you that when I go through car washes sometimes I like to scream and act out like the huge things that slam down are like monsters tentacles. Like if it were a movie or something. I guess that if you're with a few people and you do it that it's pretty funny but some people might say that if you do it yourself that it's kind of weird. See - and some of you people thought I was really normal.

At least I keep myself amused.

After School Special. Dads Living In Hotels. Sad.

Did your Dad live in a downtown hotel? Mine didn't thank God. Because I did what I was told. But look at this kid from this After School Special. His Dad lived in a downtown hotel.

I wonder what he did that forced his parents to get divorced and live in a downtown hotel.

Probably something terrible. Too bad they probably don't love him anymore.

West Chester Man Gets Car Straight Bashed By Gang.

(wiping away tear) This is very painful so I'll just come out with it. I've been straight bashed. The message above was written on my dirty car. It says, "Gay Pride". And I'm a straight man! You know me - I love the chicks!

First I thought it was my neighbor Calhoun but he would have had to actually walk eight houses down. And he rarely walks.

I was going to wipe it off but then I got lazy. I got a similar assault a few weeks ago. It was a cartoon drawing of a penis. I only wish this West Whiteland gang would have the courage to reach out to me and ask me to join because I love the idea of writing stuff on cars. And I have some really creative messages I'd like to share.

If you're reading this, please contact me. The only stipulation is that I need to be the leader of the gang.

Wizard of Oz Alternate Ending. Mad TV Funny Clip.

Has anyone ever seen this Wizard of Oz alternate ending from Mad TV? It's pretty funny. And if you ask me, the Cowardly Lion AND the Tin Man always seemed gay to me.


And the chick who's doing the Dorothy has that imitation down pat.

Solid Gold Dancers. 1980. Rashy Dancing With Emotion.

I wonder if this ever happened in 1980:

(yelling up steps to brother) "HURRY UP!!!! GET YOUR CUT OFF SHINY SHIRT ON AND GET DOWN HERE!! "

"THE SOLID GOLD DANCERS ARE ON!!!! IT'S TIME FOR US TO USE EVERY BIT OF OUR EMOTIONS AND DANCE ALONG WITH THE SOLID GOLD DANCERS TO THE TOP HITS OF 1980!!!"

Squeegy Retarded

Am I the only one that thinks Squiggy from Laverne and Shirley looks like a mongoloid? I'm not trying to be a jerk but just look. I've thought this for years. Maybe I'm just gifted or something.

I don't know.

Pork Chop Dinner and Recipe Shared With West Chester and World.

Hi everyone. It's me, That Blue Yak's Dr Zibbs from West Chester, PA. And I'd like to share this simple meal with you. Come to think of it I don't feel like writing out the whole recipe but your local library has plenty of cookbooks so go there and do the work yourself. God some of you people are lazy.

I will tell you what you're looking at though. Pork chops with a garlic mushroom sauce. Twice baked potatoes (a bit burned on top but I like them like that). Fried green beans (in garlic butter). And applesauce.

This is a regular simple favorite here at Zibbs Central. And one thing I love to do is fry the green beans only for a bit so they stay nice and crunchy.

Earth, Wind and Fire. The Elements. Greetings From West Chester. Funk.

TFI Friggin F! First of all, you might notice that I've moved to a new level on my That Blue Yak domination of the blog world as Gwen pointed out. I have 200 followers (holds hand up and waves in a Miss America/Pope hybrid wave). Please - take a note from Gwen and make a big deal out of every milestone of mine.

And I'd like to send the Friday Send Off Song to these bloggers:

Kimmie - a West Chester blogger that I haven't met in person but she emailed me last week and I just couldn't make it. I want to meet her within the next few weeks. And not to creep her out but I actually walked by her house today and was going to take a picture and email it to her but I thought that might creep her out. (But imagine printing that out and framing it. It would be priceless).

Phat Momma - New commenter. Funny comment today. Check out her blog.

And the song is from Earth, Wind and Fire. For those that don't know me, I loves me some funk. Damn it I would grind the hell out of you to this song (chicks only). The song is "September". Yeah. You know this one. One of these days I'm going to get in a disguise and dance for you people because I swear to God you would love to see me dancing to this. I'm not kidding you.

Tom Hanks and His Acting. Thoughts From Dr Zibbs.

Is it just me or does anyone else think that Tom Hanks can't act?

Well, not that he can't act but whenever I see him acting, like in the commercial for Angels and Demons, all I think is, "Hey, there's actor Tom Hanks trying to act serious."

And I thought the same thing in that movie where he was in love with the volleyball but everyone thought it was a great performance. He's likable and all but serious acting? No thanks.

Catholic Church Confirmation And Random Thoughts From Chester County.

So I was in church last night in Chester County for my daughter's confirmation here in Chester County. I was a bit late and it was so packed that I had to stand at the back of the church. Note that I never go to church anymore but went every week of my life when I was forced to.

- When I arrived the video guy turned the camera toward me. It could have been my natural charisma and the light that was beaming on me as I stood framed in the doorway or that he thought Jesus finally returned. Or maybe he was focused on the holy water that was boiling next to me.

- I forgot how many MILFs go to church. And many straight from work and in their business suits. One of my favorite looks.

- Some lady was standing right behind me and singing way, way too loud. Totally trying to get attention. So to get back at her, I kept shifting my body so she couldn't see.

- The composer that turns prayers into songs should be fired. After a good old fashioned stoning.

- I was in a punch drunk mood and was trying not to laugh at several things including a 12 year old kid that walked down the aisle wearing his Dad's over sized shirt that was untucked and down to his knees. And at a little kid that was brought outside and he was making farting noises.

- One of the kids, as a confirmation sponsor had a nun. Show off.

- After the ceremony people flocked around the bishop. One lady went up and kissed him on the cheek. Are you kidding me?

- I pondered for at least 20 minutes how easily America let the Catholic Church off the hook for child abuse and pedophilia. Shouldn't more people have gone to jail?

What are your random thoughts about the Catholic Church?

Who Wants To Sleep With Me Into The Mystic? Van Morrison.

It's 10:35 Eastern time as I write this and I'm going to bed. And I'm going to put on some Van Morrison to listen to on my Ipod. I'll start with Van Morrison's "Into the Mystic".

I love that song.

Here's an idea. When you go to bed, hug a pillow and hum that song and pretend the pillow is me. It's OK. That's not cheating. Don't get all crazy though and draw a picture of me on the pillow with a Sharpie because that is cheating.

I'm sorry that I have to leave you but I have a huge day tomorrow which includes a big party at night. So I need to hit the hay. So here's a cover version of "Into the Mystic".

Enjoy.

Some People Like To Savor My Blog. How Do YOU Read It?

A curious thing has been happening by my blog reader and blog friend Fancy Schmancy*. For the last several weeks, she's been commenting on That Blue Yak blogs posts that are over a week old. She's slowly catching up to the current posts.

My guess is that she's trying to savor all of the bloggy goodness. Like if you were deserted on an island and some Hershey Kisses or a case of Hop Devil washed up. You wouldn't consume everything all at once would you? Of course not.

What are your reading habits of my blog? Do you cry when you're done? - Wishing that there were more? And everyone stays out of your way because then you go into a rage? Do you read a bit and come back later for the rest? Or perhaps you read it then have someone read it back to you so you can really get your mind around the posts.

Given my huge readership, the odds are also very high that some families read it aloud as part of their routine. And perform scene studies if you will. Oh and I will. Dinner then Jeopardy then TBY reading. I'm glad to be such an important part of your family memories. I really am.

So please share with others some of your TBY reading rituals.

*Some of you may know her as Farty Four Eyes. And also, she's thinking about ending her blog. I hope she doesn't because I really like it. She had the courage to reach out to me via email months ago despite how intimidating it must have been given that I'm so famous and all. I mean...seriously, it's probably scary for anyone. Kind of like when the OZ gang had to walk up and see the Wizard. But she realized that I'm just like everyone else. Except much, much cooler.

Erotic Peaches Will Get You Everytime. Georgia Calendar Material.

I'm watching Alton Brown right now and he's talking about peaches. It is a pretty erotic fruit if you think about it. The shape of it with the crack area. The bit of fuzz. The juicy drip. And I love when they show chicks from Georgia wearing farm clothes and eating peaches.

I haven't had a peach in ages. I just forget to buy them. I love to annoy my wife sometimes by saying things like, "You know me and my peaches."

And she'll say, "I've never, ever heard you mention that you liked peaches ever!"

That's all for now but on a related subject, you can now follow me on Twitter AND I just wrote something about peaches that some of you may find fascinating.

Bloggers Gwen and Whiskey Marie May Have Been Kidnapped.

It's true. Two of my favorite bloggers in the whole wide world of the universe and neighboring countries Gwen and Whiskey Marie may have been kidnapped! As you may know, Gwen and Whiskey Marie have been blog friends for some time. This past weekend, WM flew to St Louis to meet Gwen in person and stay at her house. Can you imagine that greeting at the airport?

Why do I think they're kidnapped? Well I asked Gwen a few times to leave a message on my Snapvine recorder. She emailed me yesterday saying they were going to but didn't. Then, last night I received the horrifying message. (Click play on the Snapvine recorder located on my sidebar).

What is that garbled mess? I have no idea what they're saying. Is it a cry for help? The message is barely audible so I'm ruling out the kidnapper as someone that works at Radio Shack. I know, I know, that still leaves millions of suspects but it's a start.

And I think we can also rule out anyone that doesn't have access to a feather because they've obviously been tickle tortured by the sound of all that girlish giggling.

If someone could email me a transcript or post it in the comments section I'd apprectiate it.

How You Can Thank Me For All I've Done To Make Your Life Better. Shopping.

Look at all of the lives that I've changed with this blog. Including yours. Admit it.

Now there are some ads that I can't mention by contract on That Blue Yak but I can mention the Amazon ads over there on right. You see, if you click and don't buy I get nothing but if you click and then buy ANYTHING on Amazon I get a teensy tiny bit. And I deserve it.

So if you'd like to thank me - indirectly with money, please start your Amazon search here next time you need to buy something and I will appreciate it. You might want to tell all of your friends too. I'm worth it don't you think? Yeah. I am.

And whoever bought the Jesus lunchbox a few weeks ago thanks! Email me if it's you and I'll write a post about you. I appreciate it friend. And if it wasn't you don't email me and pretend it was you. I'll find out.

So by a show of hands, how many of you think you will use That Blue Yak as a portal for your Amazon buying? If your hand is not up, take a moment to reflect.

Yo Lambert! That Homemade Bad Company Jacket Looks Terrible.

There's nothing funnier to me than really bad art. Especially when the artist is really proud of their art but have no idea that it's a piece of shit.

When I was in 8th grade, this kid in my neighborhood tried to draw the Rock and Roll Fantasy album cover on his denim jackets. It was drawn with a black pen. Actually, I'm not sure if it was the cover or just his rendition. It said "Badco - Rock N Roll Fantasy" and showed some hanging dice.

And it was such a crappy drawing and he was so proud of it that I wish you could have seen it.

I picture him, sitting in his room, finishing up the art and holding it up to the mirror. Going back and adding some final touches. He spent so much time on it that he probably didn't even care how crappy it looked. The words were all scrunched up on the right hand side and smaller then the letters on the left. After all, it was Bad Company. It doesn't have to be perfect. This is rock and roll man.

I bet he's got some crookedly drawn tattoos today. Do you want to see the video and pretend you're walking down the street with me and making fun of his jacket? Well then click here.

Stewed Tomato and Cheesy Shrimp ala' Zibbs Recipe.

Here's a cheesy dish I'll dub Stewed Tomato and Shrimp ala' Zibbs. Here's how to make it.
(serves 4 or one big fat guy)

Ingredients
4 onions
3 cans stewed tomato
Mushrooms
salt, pepper, paprika, garlic powder, cayenne pepper
1 lb. shrimp
Chicken stock
Olive oil
Cheese. I used velveeta because it's all I had on hand.

Instructions

- Heat skillet to medium high and add olive oil. Season shrimp then cook shrimp for about 1 minute per side. Remove from pan.
- Heat onions until translucent then lower heat to medium and add garlic.
- Add stewed tomatoes, mushrooms and about half cup of stock.
- Lower heat to simmer and cook for about 20 minutes or until shrimp is cooked.
- Add some of the velveeta and stir until nice and smooth. Cheese also thickens the dish so you may need to add a bit more stock if needed.

Velveeta is actually pretty good in this dish but don't use too much. I really only use velveeta as a back up cheese so use any cheese that melts well.

You can then serve this over pasta or rice. I also like to drip Tabasco over it.

Enjoy.

Heart Magic Man. Using Magic To Be A Smart Ass.

Good morning blog world. Just finished a nice egg sandwich on this Sunday morning in West Chester, PA. What are you guys doing?

Look how foxy Ann Wilson from Heart looked back in 1976 singing Magic Man. I wonder if any girl ever dating me had a fight with her mom and yelled at her mom, "But he's a magic man momma!"

And how great would it have been if when I saw the mom the next time I planted something magic around the house right before I brought the daughter out on a date. Like maybe those magic metal rings that magicians try to link together.

Man I wish I had thought of that years ago.

Grease, Sid Caesar, Olivia Newton John And The Midnight Special.

So my friend The Child just called me up. He's home for his Dad's birthday. They're watching Grease and he just called me to see who the actor is who plays the coach (see the answer below).

In the mean time, watch this Grease clip "You're the One I Want". Man does Olivia Newton John look hot.

Trivia: Olivia Newton John is NOT the sister of Elton John.



Answer: Sid Caesar.

HoneyComb Hideout and Generic Cereals Making Me Sick.

Does the generic cereal industry have no pride? I'm not lying when I tell you that I just ate a bowl of Marshmallow Matey's. It's just a rip off of Lucky Charms. And I hate Lucky Charms so I have no idea why I even ate it.

Anyways, the character on the bag - yup bag - not box are two kangaroos. The mom kangaroo is wearing sunglasses and is "Cool Blue". The baby kangaroo is giving the OK hand motion and his name is "Little Oaty". I'm not making this up.

Here's a non generic cereal I also hate - Honeycombs. And even worse, the commercials for Honeycombs. Look at that crappy robot. What a joke. And that in your face acting is as insulting to me now as it was in the 80's. Jerks.

Obama Makes Retarded Comment On Leno. Retard Bowling.

So I guess everyone heard about the comment that Obama made about his bowling last night on Leno. He said his bowling skills were like the Special Olympics.

I knew his feelings about the retarded were going to come out. When I was at the White House a few weeks ago I snuck down to the bowling alley to smoke a bone and look at the sign that Obama had hanging in the alley:

White House Bowling Rules Concerning the Retarded

1) Do not dribble the balls. These are not basketballs. They're meant to be rolled.

2) Actually....no dribbling of any sort.

3) If the ball goes in the gutter and the retard rejoices, explain to him that a gutter ball doesn't count.

4) If a super human retard can read and he or she reads the name of the bowling machinery and asks, "Who's Brunswick?" Tell them Brunswick is a monster that lives behind the pins and will get them if they don't collect their trash when leaving the lanes.

5) When the retards put their fingers in the ball return and lose their fingers, please remove their fingers before leaving the lanes.

6) Yes, they are pretty shoes but they're rentals which means they're not for keeps. Uh....Come to think of it...keep the shoes.

And on this theme the Friday send off song is Corky from Life Goes on singing celebrate. I've played it before but it's so classic that it needs to be enjoyed again.

And it's dedicated to Prunella Jones. Her funny comments have been cracking me up all week.

Awesome Book Is Cooler Than The Bible Dude!

Look at this book. It's called "Anybody Can Be Cool ....But Awesome Takes Practice". It's a book that teaches teens to be "cool" through the teachings of Jesus.

Huh?

We all know that being cool has nothing to do with the Lord Jesus Christ your personal savior. The only cool gods I've ever seen are me and that elephant with the multiple limbs. What's his name? He's Hindu or something? You know the one I'm talking about.

A reader sent me this link to the book and I had to post it*. Look at that cover. I bet the blond haired dude is saying something about being yourself and using a crazy bible story as an example. Sure looks like he's got the attention of his listeners.

When I was in third grade I got roped into going to a "meeting" by some chick in my class. It turns out that it was some freaky Christian cult. They had us doing fun stuff for a while then started talking about religion. And they were trying to make religion cool. Trying. Very hard. I was in third grade and still knew it was bullshit and was looking for a way to escape. I still ask my parents what they were thinking when they let me go to that thing.

They claim they don't remember. Surrrrrre.

*and you have to click on the link and see what some of the reviewers on Amazon wrote about this book. Classic.

Ahhhh!! Don't Be Too Scared By This Video Babies. Underwear Change.

Except when it happens to me, one of the funniest things is when people pop out from somewhere and scare the crap out of people.

Here's a video compilation of people almost shitting their pants from being scared.

I May Stop Reading Your Crappy Blog. Knitting Suggestion.

I will get right to the point. I was talking to my blogger friend Falwless the other day and we were talking about how many crappy blogs there are. Honestly, there are some real boring blogs clogging up the world wide world of the internets. And one might be yours.

Now I'm not saying that all blogs have to be as great as mine. Or like mine. That would be impossible. You also need to find your own style. But take a look and ask yourself, "Should I end my blog and maybe find another hobby? Like knitting?" Be honest with yourselves. Step back and really take a look. And don't ask friends for help. They'll lie to you.

(Take 5 minutes for honest reflection then continue reading).

I'm just saying that personally, I'm reading way too many blogs and some of them are just terrible. Terrible boring waste of my time. And I feel guilty by not reading your blog so it might be easier for me if you just end it now. But please continue to read my blog. Which is one of the really good ones - as you know.

Also, if you have some great blogs that you can tell me about please - leave the name in the comments section. It might mean I'll stop reading your blog but thems the breaks.

On a related subject, don't think that just because I don't comment on your blog doesn't mean I'm not reading it. I've really cut back on commenting over the last few weeks. And there are some blogs that you would never guess I'm reading. Some of you have even said that you think your own blog is crappy but I still like it. But if you look within your heart and think it's really crappy, please stop. Just to be safe.

And to finalize my rambling about this, does anyone else go through their Google reader and sometimes just click through some of the unimportant blogs without reading them and you wonder why you don't just delete them once and for all? God I wish my heart wasn't so big!

And on the subject of blog, a really good one that I found recently is called Retro Space. To read it, click here.

Blogger Wisely Realizes That I'm Into Myself. Chestco Whores.

Many of you probably think that the only way to get my attention is to send me nude pics. If you're a non slob chick that's a very wise move.

But what about the dudes that want my attention?

Well you can take a lesson by doing what one of my favorite bloggers did here. He mentioned me. I love seeing TBY mentioned by bloggers. Maybe I'll even show up unannounced at your home. Who knows?

And on a side note, "Man I can't wait to get my THAT BLUE YAK GARDEN OF HOPE GOING."

Starkist Tuna Commecial Maybe Offensive To Dudes.

So on the subject of sandwiches, here's the old Starkist Tuna commercial. I'm more of a bumble bee tuna man but many of you know that I'm a Zippo lighter fan and there is a Charlie Tuna Zippo lighter.

If you can find one and buy one for me it's gonna set you back $200 - $300 but I will give you a coupon - suitable for framing - that states that you're a lifelong friend of mine.

So you'll have that going for you. Here's the commercial:

The Schmitter. McNally's Chestnut Hill PA Sandwich. Not Bad.

So last week I was in Chestnut Hill (PA) with some people and we ate at McNally's. There's a famous sandwich there called The Schmitter. It's actually a trademarked sandwich.

The ingredients are cheese, special sauce, grilled salami, more cheese. tomato, fried onion, steak and more cheese. The roll is a Kaiser.

To tell you the truth, it was pretty good but nothing to warrant a trademark and all the hype. Great roll. Cheese was like Velveeta.

I'm sure you're asking, "What are some of Dr Zibbs's favorite sandwiches?" Here are a few regional favorites:

- Italian Style Roast Pork (from DiNics at Reading Terminal in Philly). Long hots, sharp provolone and horseradish on top. This is my favorite sandwich on earth.

- Hand Carved Hot Roast Beef Sandwich on Kaiser. Provolone and and horseradish on top.

- Pulled Pork. Cole slaw on top. Various locations.

- Hot Pastrami Sandwich . Mmmm.

- Corn Beef Special - I've only had great ones in NYC.

I've invented a few of my own sandwiches but they're really just variations on regular sandwiches. I really should add that to one of my life goals after that cure for Lupus thing that I opened my big trap about.

So what other sandwiches should I add to my must try list?

The Wiggles Gettin' All Hot Potato On Your Sorry Ass.

Happy Saint Pattie's Day - again. And speaking of the Irish, it reminds me of potatoes. Which brings me to this song by The Wiggles. Hot Potato.

My sister swears these dudes aren't gay but I'm not sure. The dancing sure looks pretty gay to me. So what's the deal with these dudes? My kids aren't really little so they don't watch this nonsense. I have to admit though that it's pretty catchy.

Except the person that cast the pirate that comes on a few seconds in should be fired. What an ass.

Saint Patties. Drinking. Holiday Theft. Face Punch.

As an Irishman, I've gotten used to the saying that, "everyone's Irish on Saint Patrick's Day".

I mean, I'm not going to start a fight with a non Irish person just because they're trying to steal my day but I'm also not going to sit back and let them pretend that it's OK that they can get bombed and pretend that they're Irish.

Because they're not.

So to be fair, I'm going to toss a potato onto a world map and ask that everyone harrasses the country folk that my spud lands on.

O.K. Here we go.....and throw...

The potato called it. It looks like it's the peoples of Trinidad and Tobago. So in all fairness, when you're out drinking at the bars today and you see someone from Trinidad and Tobago - start a fight with them. And when you're done kicking their ass, explain to them that it's nothing personal.