Monday, March 30, 2009

West Chester Man Gets Car Straight Bashed By Gang.

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(wiping away tear) This is very painful so I'll just come out with it. I've been straight bashed. The message above was written on my dirty car. It says, "Gay Pride". And I'm a straight man! You know me - I love the chicks!

First I thought it was my neighbor Calhoun but he would have had to actually walk eight houses down. And he rarely walks.

I was going to wipe it off but then I got lazy. I got a similar assault a few weeks ago. It was a cartoon drawing of a penis. I only wish this West Whiteland gang would have the courage to reach out to me and ask me to join because I love the idea of writing stuff on cars. And I have some really creative messages I'd like to share.

If you're reading this, please contact me. The only stipulation is that I need to be the leader of the gang.

37 comments:

J. Hi said...

You make me laugh--Ha!

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Better not mess with them; they are the true GANG BANGERS!

Shawn said...

I think it's the infamous 'Get Outta Da Closet' gang and they are trying to tell you something.

We all know you cook, do you coordinate your clothing? Do you know the words to any musicals? How do you feel about Joan Rivers and Barbra Streisand?

Just let your true self out and there will be no more tears! C'mon Zibbs, you can do it!

Dr Zibbs said...

And before anyone says it, I'm aware that if it were a straight bashing that they would have written something straight on my car not gay.

But straight bashing just sounded funnier.

O.G. said...

You could end this assault by washing your car...just a thought.

Mandy's Kidding said...

Where's the picture of the cartoon peen?

Tease.

Dr Zibbs said...

Mandy - I'm not making this up but the image before this was the cartoon penis complete with squirt - but I didn't have a camera handy.

So this is the second time this happened.

Rachel said...

You want to be the straight leader of a gay streetgang? Sounds like something you could get behind. :)

My mom once woke up to find her car had been vandalized with bologna and slices of american cheese.

In my younger days, my friend and I used to make our own bumper stickers and place them on unsuspecting cars. Our favorite: "I brake for homos".

Think I could join, too?

The Jules said...

It's not a proper graffiti penis without the squirt.

I've stopped having posting problems now, by the way!

:-)

Kelly said...

Maybe there's a gay owned car wash near you and they're trying to drum up business.

Cora said...

You really need to wash that car, Zibbs! Make the kids do it. They owe you.

As for no pic of the penis drawing let me just say this: DISAPPOINTED! Next time, right? You'll post a pic next time? Okay then. You're forgiven.

Gilligan said...

The handwriting is way too sloppy to be gay. This is obviously the work of their straiht leader (whom you'll have to defeat if you want to take over the gang).

Jennifer and Sandi said...

They must be lazy too because they used their finger instead of spray paint!

HAPPY MONDAY!!

~ Jennifer

words words words said...

There's only one way to combat this. Go to your local gay bar and put up cheesecake calendars from your local mechanic. Maybe a sports poster, too.

Anna Russell said...

I want to see their gang colours. I bet they've got snazzier jackets than The Pink Ladies from Grease.

mo.stoneskin said...

I'm curious, what type of car do you have? That could be a factor...

Kimmie said...

DUDE! There is a $3 car wash on Market! Cripes!

diane said...

That is the weirdest dirt on your car. It looks like your car got pelted with dirt from the side, strange.
You have creative teenagers in your area. Ours just write "wash me".

Gwen said...

Given the lack of glitter and ribbons, this seems to be the work of straight vandals.

Blonde Goddess said...

"complete with squirt"....HAHAHA!
You crack me up!

Girl Interrupted said...

Maybe you should check this site out - for detective purposes only, of course


www.gaythugdating.com/


BTW ... QCTM @ your twitter messages

Soda and Candy said...

My favorite dirty-car graffiti is "I wish my girl was this dirty"

Dominica said...

Sorry, but you made my day....I just fell down my chair...
:-O


...
Reminds me of an episode of Top Gear I saw a few weeks ago...
...
Diane, I'm hooked again (I just burned my bra..)

Jeannie said...

Obviously, someone doesn't like you. It's probably a kid. What have you been doing?

LiLu said...

It was me. What of it?

Mr London Street said...

I can't see any self-respecting gay man touching a car that filthy without getting a tetanus jab first.

Son of a Thomas said...

What do you think they used to write it with Hmmmmmm!

Kate said...

Yes, what Mr. London Street said.

gorillabuns said...

just checked out gay thug dating. did you know they have a Gay Thug Chubby chatroom?

the things i learned today...

Michelle said...

I wanna see the graffiti penis too!!!

Love
Stalker

Dr Zibbs said...

Michelle - you just may see it.

Amy said...

I think if you do start a gang that your signature should be the penis squirty thingy and "was here".

Awesome, right?

akfireweed said...

I am a tough lesbian. I could beat someone up for you. But, that would be a bit odd in this case. Maybe I could just arm wrestle someone, and then open a can of pinto beans with a pocketknife while wearing flannel.

Dr Zibbs said...

akfireweed - I'll take you up on that.

katrocket said...

I don't think you're cool enough to be the leader of a gay gang.

sista #2 said...

You are not cool enough to be in a car writer gang.

And clean your car, why dontcha.

peace
#2

Candice said...

That seems to be a very rough and dangerous gang you've got there. Better walk around with your ass cheeks squeezed tightly together.

Never know what might slip up there if not!