Thursday, September 8, 2011

What Was In Your Lunch Bag At School? Hit The Road Little Debbie.

What was in your lunchbag at school? Or were you a "buyer?"

My lunch bag consisted of three things from 1st to 12th grade:

1) Sandwhich - peanut butter and jelly, ham and cheese or turkey and cheese. White bread only thank you.

2) Salty treat - either chips or doritos.

3) Dessert: Some cupcakey thing. Like a Tastykake or Ring Ding. We weren't Twinkie people so never got one of those. And my Mom tried to sneak in Little Debbie's once and a while. You know my thought on those.

And I need to check with Mommy but I think she made my lunch all the way up through 12th grade. I forget.

Things could have been worse. I could have been given an egg salad sandwich like Lambert. Wrapped in clear plastic wrap. As opposed to the normal platic lunch bag. Why in God's name would Lambert's mom give him a stinky ass egg salad sandwich? It stunk! She probably didn't love him.

Or those people that were sent fruit in tupperware. Nooooo thanks! Or Hopton (dude had 7 and a half toes) that had to fold up his brown paper bag and bring it home because his mom was a penny pincher. Seriously, how much money are you saving a year from using 13 less brown paper bags? The dude always had a wrinkly ass bag. Shameful.

Then of course it could have been better. I kind of envied the people that got these:


Scope said...

I always hoped that the kids who got those would cut their tongues licking the puddin' off the lid and bleed out.

Rich bastards!

Dr Zibbs said...

Scope - Haha. ME TOO!! Fucking fat cats!

Tristachio said...

First off, if I were at the ole swimming hole and a scary cartoon lady came flying at me on a handbeater, I'd lay off the coke right then and there.

Secondly, my lunches were always sort of awesome because we had this system where myself and my five siblings would take turns packing our lunches and my parents decided it wasn't something that should be supervised so we always went to school loaded with the good stuff. Which we would then turn around and sell for "normal" food because, dude, we didn't have a fucking sammich.

Or, alternatively, we'd show up with homemade Jerky and have command over anyones lunch because they all wanted our Jerky.

My siblings and myself were sort of like the lunch time Mafia.

W.C.Camp said...

Yeah I had to bring home brown bags too until they were so wrinkly and paper transparent they could hold no more. But do you remember those little insulated screw-on lid containers? Once in awhile I would get REAL SOUP or warm pasta or something good. Fun post! W.C.C.

sybil law said...

I'd say 85% of the time I had pb&j, chips, carrot sticks, apple or grapes, and some kind of treat (cookie or something). It was by FAR my favorite lunch. I damn near always threw the apples away, but I'd eat the grapes. I actually remember getting egg salad once, and being pretty excited about it! WC hit the nail on the head, though, with the thermos containers - that was the shit.
Still - it was the lunch box that made you cool - or not. I had badass lunch boxes - my favorite was The Muppet Show one, or maybe Scooby Doo.

Kristina P. said...

When I was in elementary school, I had a friend show mom packed a can of that squeezy cheese, in her lunch, ever day. I was always so jealous. One of the best perks of being a grownup is being able to buy squeezy cheese and sugary cereal.

Dr Zibbs said...

Oooh Sybil I'm going to have to post what my lunch box was.

Kristina - Squeezy Cheese? What's that?

shrink on the couch said...

Then there were the girls who carried their lunches to school in white lunch bags with pink flower design. Thought I was the cat's meow.

Dominica said...

a)sandwiches but more the UK 4 o'clock type : triangles, no crust with cheese, ham or both. Chocopasta was also between them ; that's Belgian chocolate melted between your sandwiches mmm (Cote d'Or brand)

b) 3 musketeers candy bar for 10 o' clock

c) Capri Sun orange or apple juice (always a mess when you are an 8y old and you needed to open it by yourself)

d) after school : Prince choco biscuits (eating them on your way home)

Dr Zibbs said...

Hold on!! The girl at the beiginning is Laura Ingells!!

Kate said...

I noticed that right away, lil' Laura from Lil' House on the Prairie.

Fun post! Looking forward to the lunch box post.

Dr Zibbs said...

Kate - lunch box post is now up.

Cora said...

Ugh. I always had a PB&J sandwich, apple juice, and brownish nasty repulsive apple slices.


(And here I have the gall to wonder where my vicious hate of apples comes from! Thanks a lot, Mom!)

Kristen said...

This is painful to write about, but my mom made me reuse lunch bags for my first year or two of middle school. Middle school! But at least I had all my toes.

Dr Zibbs said...

Kristen - Prove it.

Kristen said...

Notice I said I had all my toes. Past tense :(

Dr Zibbs said...

Kristen - well I guess I'll just have to take your word for it.