Saturday, March 29, 2008

Drive By Farting Video Is Shockingly Funny

Here is a great video of news woman Dawn Scott trying to report on a very serious crime, when some naked dude - wearing a ski mask appears out of nowhere and....well..see for yourself (even though I revealed the secret in the title):

Don Rickles On Dean Martin Roast - Classic Comedy

Here's a great clip of Don Rickles on a Dean Martin celebrity roast. Celebs include Ronald Reagan, Bob Hope, Sugar Ray and Milton Berle. If you can watch this without laughing, you're dead. Keep an eye out for our friend Nipsey Russell

Friday, March 28, 2008

Krofft Supershow Dr Shrinker, Electra Woman, and More

Here's a little gem from the past - The 1975 First Season Intro of the Krofft Super Show. I believe that this is from the Friday Night preview show that they'd play the night before the new Saturday shows started. Sid and Marty sure could create a lot of junk.

Bobby Bittman - Now That Was Stand up Comedy!

Bobby Bittman... SCTV. The best sketch comedy show ever? Eugene Levy was so great as Bittman, he and Sammy Maudlin (Joe Flaherty) could have had their own show just with these characters. For how much I loved the old SNL, SCTV was much better. Enjoy this classic clip:

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Robin Williams Responds to Divorce with Predictable Zaniness

Robin Williams responded to inquiries concerning his split with wife Marsha Garces Williams with an exclusive, babbling voicemail on the THAT BLUE YAK phone line (sorry Cojo):

Williams: the split? It was very tough...(John Wayne voice): It was so tough partner I broke a tooth..(Gay dentist voice): OHHH! You broke a tooth? Well sit right down...and don't forget to RINSE! Wait did I say RINSE? Good God..(Preacher voice): Good God Jesus! I need you to put up your hands and pray..DID YOU HEAR ME? PRAYYYYYYY!...ahhh haa..ooohhh.ahhh!
It could be worse. You could be Billy Crystal.

Chelsea Clinton at West Chester U March 27 - Not Hillary

Our last post was incorrect. Chelsea Clinton NOT her annoying mom Hillary will be at West Chester University Thursday, March 27. We apologize for any mistake in your plans. Please use the rotting fruits and vegetables that you were planning to throw at Hillary and give them to a bum.
Thank you.

Hillary Clinton Coming to West Chester - Take Cover

I just received a voice mail from Chelsea Clinton saying that her mom will be at West Chester University tomorrow (Thursday, March 27). She'll be at Sykes Student Union at 3:45. I'm not sure if I've been invited to a one-on-one with her, or if the message was a mass voicemail, inviting many the unimportant people around Chester County.
First of all, Chelsea don't you EVER leave a message on the machine of THAT BLUE YAK. We are busy manufacturing very important products and/or servicing top businesses in the Chester County area. We don't have the time for nonsense.
Secondly, we will try to send a representative down to heckle your mom. When you hear the yell of, "OH YEAH...RIGHT!", you'll know it was us.
Thirdly, I just visited your mom's website and let me tell you, it is a complete waste of bandwidth.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Flip the Bird - Short Book Review and Various Facts and Trivia

"Highway Salute", "New York Hello" The Canadian turn Signal" - all different ways to say "Flip the Bird".
It's True: Historians say the first documented Bird flipping was in 1886 when baseball player Charles "Old Hoss" Radbourn extended his middle finger while posing for a photo with his team - the Boston Beaneaters.

Most kids learn how to flip the bird when they realize that the comeback, "So's your face" - is totally ineffective.
Do you want to know 101 ways to flip the bird? You're in luck. 101 Ways to Flip the Bird by Jason Joseph and Rick Joseph is now on sale at most book stores, Amazon and Urban Outfitters - (or you can read it on your lunch hour at the Exton Square Mall like I did. My favorite bird flip? The crank.

My favorite related bird flip gesture? The trick finger (Hiding all but the tip of the finger behind your hand, then slowly moving your hand to reveal not your middle finger, but your ring or "trick" finger. Then look at the person like they're a dick and say "'Trick Finger". (Important: this one is NOT in the book).
Here are some other links related to flipping the bird:

Picture of Johnny Cash flipping the bird

"Flip the Bird" T-shirt on sale at Threadless T-shirts

Saturday, March 22, 2008

The Best Cheese Steak in Chester County

The owners of The Westtown Butcher Shop and Deli were in for a pleasant surprise this morning when they opened shop. Why? Because greeting them on their doorstep was a five foot tinfoil covered dome with 10 paper mache yak horns protruding from it. In the middle of the tinfoil, the words "BEST CHEESESTEAK IN CHESTER COUNTY" were taped.

THAT BLUE YAK janitor Willie B. Phelps explains:
That is correct, they've won the best cheesesteak in the area award. Many cheesesteak were sampled before this coveted award was declared. The roll has has the perfect fluffiness. The meat is rib eye. Very classy. Everything about it is perfect.

Be prepared though if you're planning to eat there because there are no tables. You can bring your own bucket and use it as a seat, but I don't think they encourage that because they were looking at me funny the whole time.

To get there, if you're leaving West Chester on High Street, pass the Parkway Shopping Center and take a right, right before Stetson.

And of course, ENJOY.

To see other reviews of cheesesteaks, check out BestCheesesteaks.Com

Springfield PA Parade Destroys the Good Name of Mr. Peanut

I've seen some crappy mascot costumes but I am calling for the firing of the person in the Planters licensing department that approved this Mr Peanut Costume. This was the horrific scene last week at the Springfield Saint Patties Day parade. I mean, where should I start? Just look at the inferior fabric, the thin font on the hat and the yellow? It's at least three pantone shades light of the correct Mr. Peanut yellow.

And it wasn't just me. As the "Mr. Peanut" rounded the corner onto Springfield Road it was as if people had seen Godzilla. It was pure panic. People freaked and scattered in all directions to seek shelter from this beast. Although there were no deaths in the melee at least one parade goer chipped a tooth. Luckily she wasn't Irish. She was only Hungarian or something.

I hereby am demanding a written apology from Planters (a division of Kraft) and some peanuts. From Springfield I'm demanding a verbal apology, a full page written apology in the Daily Times and a key to the city. Not a big fake key, but a real key that opens up real doors in Springfield.

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Tuesday, March 18, 2008

American Idol Random - Freestyle Thoughts

Random thoughts about American Idol from West Chester:

Amanda Overmyer - As usual, complete torture. Hair? Stupid. Voice? My hair standing up on ends. Note to self: buy talcum to combat rash.

David Archuleta: Best voice for "this competition". Doesn't throw a lot of useless notes into songs. You will be the winner - or 2nd.

Brooke White: Va Va Voom! Love the curls. Great smile. No phoniness. I'm afraid you will lose, but if you can act, you may have a career.

Jason Castro: Face reminds me of troll. Name reminds me of Fidel.

Syesha Mercado: Lookin good. Sounding boring. And why did you you have the unknown guitar player two feet from you? They know their place - in the shadows and unknown. Also..nice cleavage work.

And on a side note. I may be gay because I'm actually nervously switching between AI and Dancing with the Stars.
If you really want to see someone into this show, check out mjsbigblog.

And Speaking of Dancing with the Stars - Here's James Brown

Dancing with Stars? Mostly crap. James Brown giving dance tips? No crap:

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Holy Crap! Look At That Tree That Fell On That House In West Whiteland

What do these three things have in common?

1. A woman named Olga calling you at 1:00 in the morning.

2. Being attacked by chickens.

3. Having a pine tree fall on your house.

These three things are rare occurrences. I've experienced the first two, but not the third. I can't say the same for the West Whiteland resident that heard this tree hitting their house during the storm a few days ago.
One can only image a woman snuggly under the covers. Night cap in place? Check. Cold cream on face? Check. Danielle Steel novel within reach on night stand? Check. ........SMASSHHHHH...."AHHHHH!!!!"
If anyone by any slim chance has a video of the facial expression of the owner when the tree hit, I will pay $100 for it. Please put it on Craigslist with the title "Cold Cream Covered Face Horror Scene Video".
Thank you.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Hi. I'm Frank Rizzo. How Dee Do Crappy Comcast Building?

Hi. My name is the Frank Rizzo bronze. I'm ignoring the stupid Comcast building that may or may not be on my right side. That's correct - I don't see that Philly center city building ruining my skyline. Why? Because if I did, I would have to animate myself, pull myself off of this pedestal and go dig the real me up. I would then have to track down Brian Roberts, pull him out of a board meeting and carry him like the mighty Kong to the top of this piece of junk. Bottom line this building sucks.
Side note: Look at that beautiful THAT BLUE YAK photography!

Monday, March 10, 2008

Exton KFC Taco Bell- Please Turn In Your Fast Food Status Card

Exton KFC Taco Bell - you've just made a list that most fear. The THAT BLUE YAK Joey Jo-Jo Shabadoo list. Do you know what that means? It means we're pissed. Why? For how good the triple taco supremes are, the time to get them is absurd! With only 2 cars in front of us, it took 21 minutes to go through the line. THAT WON'T DO!
Here's what we are demanding:
1) 10 days to get your time down to 6 minutes.
2) An apology in the form of a full color banner using the name THAT BLUE YAK no less than 5 times.
3) Some coupons.
If these demands are not met, we will be placing (depending on the rates) a 2" X 2" protest ad in the Daily Local News.
Get to work.

Saturday, March 8, 2008

Al Alberts Gettin' Down With Some 80's Chicks

Have you been Jonesin' for some Philly style Al Alberts Showcase? Well calm down Holmes. I'm not gonna set you up with the crappy frilly dress wearing kids B.S. No. Here you will find my man Al Alberts singing with some circa 1980 Double Mint Gum style twins. I think he was a shoe in with them until he mentioned Stella. I guess that's just his nature.

I must say, despite the crappy audio and lighting my man had to endure - it's not THAT bad. Pure Philly classic. Al Alberts is the man.

WARNING: Unless you want to get your ass kicked, NEVER mention the name Al Alberts in hearing distance of Captain Noah. Trust me. You will be crushed.


Thursday, March 6, 2008

Behold the Uglyness of the Tapir

Spotlight on the Tapir! It's amazing to me how many people have never heard of the Tapir. There's nothing like referring to a tapir in conversation only to have it come to a screeching halt because someone asks you what a tapir is. Without a doubt the tapir is the ugliest of all creatures. The elephant man of animals. Share these facts with friends today about the tapir:

- They are pig-like creatures.

- Their closest relatives are horses and rhinos.

- There are 4 different types.

- They live in South America, Central America and Southeast Asia.

- If you don't watch out....oh they'll get you.

For all things Tapir, check out TapirBlog . The tapir blog has a GREAT picture of a tapir approaching an orangutan in a swimming pool and the orangutan looks like he's about to get bitten my a shark. I'm not sure if the tapir is that dangerous or if the orangutan is just a big baby. Either way, see the hysterical here.

So now you know. Pass it on.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Ricky Gervais and Extras - Pure Hilarity

For those of you that haven't seen the HBO show Extras with Ricky Gervais, drop what you're doing and go get the DVD now. I've been watching season 2 where Ricky plays a a character on a crappy English sitcom. What makes it so great is that he has to wear an afro wig and glasses and has a ridiculous catch phrase on the show, "Are you having a laugh?" He's completely mortified because he know that the show is awful.

Everywhere he goes, people taunt him about how it's the worst piece of crap show ever. Stephen Merchant, who has been writing with him for years also plays a character on the show. In a great scene I was watching the other night, Stephen is asking a dwarf, who is on a side project with Ricky all of these ridiculous questions like:

"Would I fit in your house?"
"If you were in your bedroom and I leaned over like King King and reached in and grabbed you, would you be scared?"

In another great episode, Ricky complains about a loud child, not realizing that the kid is 100% pure retarded. Mongoloid if you will. And I will. And the actor playing him? ..Puts Corky to shame.
The show also has great guests like David Bowie, Orlando Bloom Chris Martin. And if you don't like either of those three, you'll like them after watching them on Extras.

Here's his ridiculous catch phrase: