Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Man Palms Head of Woman at the Square Bar in West Chester.

So I was at the Square Bar in West Chester the other night and saw this girl that I know. So I walk over to her (she’s not facing me) and I literally palm her head. Like you would do to a basketball.

Well, she turns around and guess what? Yup. It wasn’t her. Whoooops. I was all, “Oh sorry, I thought you were someone else.”

Phew! At least she was cool about it. And there were a bunch of people all crammed together and I had a few drinks in me so it really wasn’t embarrassing. She just kind of laughed and said, “Oh that’s OK.”

I guess that beats getting slapped.

A similar thing happened when I was in third grade. I was at church and after mass I snuck up to a girl I thought was my older sister, pulled her hair back and just whispered gibberish into her ear. Like, “Blubba goola gobbla ramalam ring ding gooba agoobba…” (something like that)

And she turns around like, “WHAT THE HELL?....”

I froze like a deer in headlights. Then I just turned and walked away. And I had to see her for the next 10 years in church. I never made eye contact with her. Because of the shame.


Rachelle said...

Oooh, that's way worse than the time I had an argument with a fashion advertisement. Oh, you don't know what that means? Let me explain!

I went shopping for cowboy boots with the guy I was dating, turned my back for a minute, and when I turned back, I could sort of see him out of the corner of my eye, standing next to a rack of shirts.

I asked his opinion of the boots I was holding, but he didn't reply. Asked again, still no answer. Made a loud, exasperated comment about being ignored. Turned to see a life-sized, cardboard cutout of George Strait, where I thought my date had been standing.

At least George Strait wasn't actually THERE to hear me! Unfortunately, my date and the salespeople were, though.

Gage1 said...

this is excellent advice:


Dr Zibbs said...

Rachelle - I love that story!

TC - Haha. I don't get it.

Gage1 said...

that's OK, I don't either.

Unknown said...

oh whoa. that all might have been a turn on to me. guess you're lucky she was cool about it.

Johnson said...

The other day I was biking to work - late - and passed what I thought was a coworker in the park near my work. I rang my bell super obnoxiously and, as I rode past her, said, "You are going to be so fucking late."

Yeah. Wasn't her. I just kept pedaling.

Rachelle said...

LMAO @ Johnson! Oh God, that's funny!

A couple of friends and I all ended up with very unfortunate haircuts at the same time; For awhile, if we were a lounge act, we would have been known as "Two Girl-Mullets and a Clipper Accident".

Anyway, we were supposed to meet at the mall, and two of us, (The Girl-Mullets) got there early. At the appropriate time, we both thought we saw Clipper Accident, so we went to join her. We came up behind this ragged-haired blonde girl in a denim vest, and started loudly smack-talking chicks with short hair, how they're too dumb to operate a comb, and telling blonde jokes and stuff like that.

We thought she was just ignoring us, so we just kept going for a few minutes. Finally, I poked her in the shoulder and said something along the lines of "Excuse me, where ever did you get that FABULOUS haircut?" in the most sarcastic voice ever.

Yeah. Also wasn't her.

sybil law said...

You... go to church?!!

Dr Zibbs said...

Sybil - Hell no! That's when I was younger.