Guy Fieri. Douche McDouche. Stupid Quotes and Backward Sunglasses.

Can you imagine if you had to interact with Guy Fieri daily? *begins to tie noose* But do you know what? I watch his show all the time. For all the douchy behavior I have to tune in! I have to watch it I tells ya! Even though I'm constantly yelling out, "Oh come on. Shut up!"

How much of his personality do you think is a show and how much do you think is real? I'm guessing that a lot of it is how he really acts. Here are a few of the stupid things he's said:

“This is kind of like hitting the nitrous button on a food career. This is full throttle.”
  
"On like Donkey Kong."

"Dude I've been sticken by chicken!"

"I wanna be the ambassader of chimichanga flavor town!"

And he always has to look right in camera when he says stuff like this. Way to be subtle Guy.

Ive got two words. Ohhhhh BROTHER!

And what's with the backward sunglasses? I'm sure he didn't make it up. Where and when did that originate? And if you're doing a TV show why the hell wouldn't you just put your sunglasses off camera? Stupid.

Larry vs The Situation. Bigger Douchebag? Jersey Shore.

So who do you think is more of a douchbag?

Old school Larry from Three's Company?



Or "The Situation" from The Jersey Shore?



I think I know the answer. It's "The Situation" isn't it? So what would you ladies do if he approached you in a bar? Would you fall for his charms?

And who the hell dates someone like him anyway?

Dude in Wolf pelt/hat is totally kickass. You know you want it.

So yesterday a Twitter guy named @higgimonster sent me this great photo of this dude wearing this wolf hat.

You know you ladies want him and you dudes want to be him. Don't lie. It's not just the kickass wolf pelt. Look at the belt buckle and the necklace. He's got it all goin' on..

And wearing jeans to a lake?...my man's got some confidence!

What do you think is kickass about him?

Questions About Displaying Hat Collections On Your Car Window Sill

Why on earth do douchebgs display their hat collections on the back window sill of their cars? You know - how they line up the baseball caps with pride as if anyone gives a shit.

At what point does someone see a hat collection and say, "That looks great. I'm going to start one. First thing to do is drive to the mall to get about three more hats so it doesn't look ridiculously bare with the four hats I currently have. Then I'll draw up some plans as to what order I'll place them".

Do hat displayers ever see another hat displayer in a parking lot and stop to compliment them?

"Hey man, what's up? Nice hats. I'm hat displayer too. It's pretty cool how you put two different era Phillies caps on either side of the current Eagles cap. It really balances the Phillies caps out and draws the eye toward the fancy stitchwork on the rim of the Eagles cap. Well done".

"Thanks man. Believe it or not, that was a mistake. I was going to do an all Phillies - by color display - and I was taking my Eagles cap scene down...well, my girlfriend calls me for something and when I came back, I was like, I think I'm on to somethin' here."

"It totally works."

Do hat displayers ever feel so proud after a new hat acquisition and layout that they drive their car around town to show them off?

(at stop light talking to girls) "Are you ladies into hats? Don't be afraid. Step a little closer. Do you see what I did back there? No big deal really....I mean, I've never seen all those caps together in one place AND displayed the way I did right back there either but...Well, that's what I do........ So, do you have any question I can answer?"