Thursday, February 5, 2009

Ear Nose And Throat Doctor. What The Hell Is That Picture?

So I had to bring my son to the Ear, Nose and Throat doctor yesterday because he's been getting nose bleeds. The doctor had to cauterize his nose which means he had to break the blood vessel a few times. In case you're wondering, I was very brave during the whole procedure. I found that if I didn't look it made it easier.

So the nurse brings us into the examination room for the 25 minutes wait. And sitting on the table is this horrifying picture*:

If I was an Ear, Nose and Throat nurse and a patient was being a dick, when I brought the person to the room I would say,

"Oh - don't be startled by that picture, it's extremely rare that you're going to end up looking like that. Only 1% - 2% end up looking like that. OK between you me it's more like 5% -10% depending on the doctor's mood. But that's still low. Don't you think?"

*If a nurse walks in while you're snapping a picture in an examination room, immediately put your hands up and say, "Not stealing anything." If you don't, they might think you were trying to steal some of the instruments.

37 comments:

Belle said...

Shit- this was way funnier than YouTube!!!
I loved the 'hands-up' bit...

Dr Zibbs said...

Thanks Belle. Glad you liked that bit.

Lisa said...

How can you steal instruments with a camera in your hands?

Just lift your gown and flash her next time... that'll take her mind off of thinking your a thief. ;)

SkylersDad said...

You should have at least taken that nasty looking spray device, just to have sitting around the house as a conversation piece.

Oh, and way to be brave.

Gwen said...

I was told I would look like that after the sinus surgery I underwent a couple years ago. Thankfully, I'm so stunning that it didn't take.

SouthernBelle said...

Horrifying picture.

Glad you were there to be an example of bravery for your boy.

Mr Belle watched me having laser eye surgery.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Count me out of any procedure described as "cauterizing".

Sounds horrorific

The Imaginary Reviewer said...

This [points to egg] is your brain.
This [points to fried egg] is your brain on drugs.
This [points to your photograph] is your brain if you're a chainsaw juggler.

Dr Zibbs said...

The Imaginary Review and Gwen - laughing my ass off at both of your comments - Bwahahahahaha

diane said...

I bet your kid was braver than you, girlyman.

My word verification is ackcaux, which probably sounds a lot like the noise you were making at the Dr.'s while trying to control your gag reflex.

April said...

That would have scared the crap out of my son. If I was a nurse there, I would totally say that too.

ÄsK AliCë said...

So where did they get that picture of my uncle from anyway?

Random Real Estate said...

You mean those popsicle sticks and cool lights aren't there as party favors? Hmmmm, now I know why my doctor was always irritated when I came to see him. My dog always loved it when I came home with the light though. She would chase it for hours.

Susan said...

That was a funny post today my friend! Funny shit. Hope the kids nose is healing. Ouch.

MO said...

Ugh I would have had to leave the room for sure...I'm weak...but I don't let me kid's see this...you are a trooper!

Cora said...

You know, I'm begining to think maybe you're not really a doctor after all, "Dr" Zibbs. Wouldn't a doctor be used to images like that, hmm? What kind of doctor did you say you were?....

Oh, and when you get a chance, between "patients" maybe, please stop by my blog. It's captcha is out of control. Can you say skanky?! I'm talking buns up and ass kitty and more. (see the comments. Poor Words Words Words!!) It's not pretty. I'd like your input. Actually, nah, I just wanna see if it flirts with you too! :-)

Dr Zibbs said...

Random Real Estate - Welcome to my blog.

Cora - I'm a Doctor of love, blogs and pork.

raf said...

Careful taking picture BEFORE examination in doctors rooms..when they have to stick whatever inside your body..they could think you are a spy..

Son of a Thomas said...

Dr. of Pork????? We're not back to the lotion show again are we?

Why don't you take some time and explain just exactly HOW your son got thoes nose bleeds Dr. Drinkygetsmacky.

Jennifer and Sandi said...

Are you telling us our Ears, Nose and throat LOOKS LIKE THAT???? Crap!

Happy Friday Eve!!

- Jennifer

BeckEye said...

That is pretty freaking creepy looking. That guy's face is all Hannibal Lecterized and shit.

Real Live Lesbian said...

Jeeezeeeus...that's scary. He's got a little booger...right there....

Kate said...

Given my delicate sensibilities, even reading about many medical procedures make me want to vomit and/or pass out. Reading this post made me gag and laugh at the same time, quite a feat sir.

Giggle Pixie said...

That picture alone would have made me run in the opposite direction!!!

Morgan the Muse said...

That does look chilling. Eh...

Vic said...

It's like a page from the frontal lobotomy coloring book.

Dr Zibbs said...

Vic now that's a coloring book I need to get.

jadedj said...

Your ruse did not work. I happen to know that that is a photo of a cautherized Capt Kirk after being bitten by the Gorn during the nosw infamous dance routine on Dancing with the Stars.

J.J. in L.A. said...

Eh, it's just a picture. Call me when your boyfriend (now ex) calls you into the room to watch something "interesting" on tv...and you walk in to see a facelift being performed.

Trooper Thorn said...

Isn't that the picture of the android from the "Six Million Dollar Man" once his face get's pulled off? (See here:
http://www.podster.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/fotos/tv_dor.jpg

Dr Zibbs said...

Trooper Thorn - GREAT CALL!

Cora said...

Pork Doctor! Ha ha! I love it!

diane said...

I'm still laughing at Son Of Thomas' comment (DrDrinkygetsmacky).
Sorry I never thought to ask how your son is doing, hope he's better now.

Greta said...

I think the word "cauterize" is as scary as the picture.

words words words said...

I hope Zibbs the Younger is okay. Me and my brother spent most of our lives being shuttled back and forth to ear nose throat specialists. It ain't fun.

Also, that totally looks like the dude from Operation. I don't know what the hell you did to his face or his beautiful red nose.

Finally, my word verification is "belly". Aw.

Andrew Rodriguez said...

I've got a good nosebleed story that kept me out of Ft Levenworth prison I'll share sometime...

ENT Doctor said...

Cauterize is definitely scary