Friday, February 13, 2009

Valentine's Day, Crappy Cards And Uglier People.



Even as far back as 3rd grade at Mary C Howse Elementary, I remember giving the Valentine's Day cards to girls in my class based on what they looked like. And it was tough because those crappy card packs of 30 back in the 70's didn't give you much to choose from.

So for example the girls I liked got a card with a cute puppy, kitten or rabbit.

The girls I didn't like got the goofier cards like the giraffe with crossed eyes peaking his head through a second story window, "I'll put my neck out for you" or the hog eating a corn cob and rolling in mud, "It's corny but will you be my Valentine?"

I wasn't trying to be mean to the uglier people. They probably didn't even pick up on what I was doing. I guess in some way I was hoping the cute girls would pick up on it. Did everyone else do this or am I the only shallow one?

All I know, when it comes to Valentine's Day and my readers, "I Choo Choo Choose You" ......and you and you. But not you.

28 comments:

Candy's daily Dandy said...

I believe this relates directly to the "natural selection" process.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

It has a picture of a train!

The cat's breath smells like cat food.

Dedene said...

Ziggy, I think that I was one of the girls who got the pig cards!
Cute post, I forgive you.:))))

Nej said...

I admit it fully....I wasn't equal opportunity with my Valentines' Day cards either. The more I liked you, the cooler the card you got.

Sassy Britches said...

Yep, the best cards were always saved for kids you liked more. But, then it could backfire and you culd be the odd man out! (sniffle)

miss amy said...

Ohhh..now I get it! Thats why 97% of my cards had giraffes on them.
I thought they were on sale or something.

Blonde Goddess said...

I was only concerned that the boys got the "boy themed" cards(spaceships, cowboys, race cars, etc...)and the girls got the "girl themed"ones(Barbie, flowery, pink,hearts, etc..)

jadedj said...

I just helped the little one do her pre-school valentines. No favorites with her. The touching thing was, since we were stuffing them with suckers, she was concerned that one little girl who can't have sugar, wouldn't get anything. Instead of a sucker, we stuck the valentine on a apple . I suppose the favorites ploy hasn't sunk in yet with my daughter...she'll learn.

Gwen said...

Yup, did the same thing. BTW, I loved your comment at Sass's. I choo choo choose you, too, nerd.

Cora said...

Yeah, I know what you mean! We did the same thing. In the 70's there weren't that many cards to choo-choo-choose from, and there was one girl at my school who was annoying as all hell and every year she'd get mostly cards with the fat pig on them. Like 20 of the same pig card EVERY DAMN YEAR. I admit it, I gave them to her too. When writing out the cards, the pig had to go to someone and who else seemed fitting for it? Just her. Like I'd give the fat, ugly pig to one of my friends! THAT would have started a WAR! Poor girl. I'm amazed she didn't fake being sick every Valentines Day so she could skip the pig pile humiliation at school!

Susan said...

My kid totally picks out her favorite valentines for her favorite people. Then the rest get the rest. Same ol' shit. Plus lots more sugar these days.

Michelle said...

I think its really the only way to do it on VD!!! Pick and choose your favorite people and screw the rest!!!

We need to realize that Valentines day stands for basically making most people feel bad because they didn't get a cute card from you DR Z!!!

I don't feel bad because I know you love me!!!

Love
Stalker

Sarah's Blogtastic Adventures said...

My older firls dont even have Valentine's Day celebrations at their school, probably for that very reason. They have Kindness Day and it was last Friday!
That shit is messed up.

SouthernBelle said...

Children giving each other Valentines is just creepy, we didn't do this at my school. I guess it's an American thing, I never heard of it except for the Simpsons.

It's either meaningless if you have to give one to everyone or hurtful if you don't and someone misses out.

PS, my word ver is bever!!! *snickers*

Weeping Sore said...

Hey! I was on the receiving end of those goofy Valentine's cards in Saint Bernadette elementary school, and don't think I didn't know it. My therapist still has to talk me down on the week before Valentine's day about the trauma of never receiving a cute kitty Valentine card. So thanks for that.

Dr Zibbs said...

Weeping Sore - Welcome to me blog.

Some Guy said...

I would always include an erotic poem on the cards to the cute girls. I was an early bloomer.

words words words said...

I always thought that kids giving Valentines in school was stupid. Especially since I always got the boy equivalent of the giraffe card. What do you suppose that would be?

I think it's creepy to have kids participate in a day set aside for love, just like I think it's creepy for people to give cards to their families.

And lastly, you stole the Wiggum train card reference I was going to make! *angrily shakes fist*

Vic said...

I don't remember anyone especially caring about the picture on the front - it was all about the numbers, baby. Who got more? Whose construction paper "mail box" was tearing under the strain? (Mine was never the fullest in the room) This was before teachers made everyone give everyone a card.

J.J. in L.A. said...

I never got cards, except from the nerdy dudes. The cool ones might've been scared off by the "wood sticks" (aka crutches) I walked on.

Wimps.

Tenakim said...

yeah, i think I got one with a chicken on it- you know poultry is very hot!

I did this, too- you're not (that) shallow.

buffalodick said...

I once got a girl a card that didn't come in the package.. I think I could have gotten laid, but was too young to know what I had done!

Fragrant Liar said...

Absolutely. Girls did this too. Only the cute boys who didn't slobber when they got excited got the good cards. Like someone else said, this is the natural selection process. If only it was fool-proof.

TishTash said...

We made our own Valentine's Day cards where I went to school, like an art project. I went a little heavy with the glitter glue. I've since atoned for this past sin by flipping people off who greet me Happy Valentine's Day. I think the bird is the antithesis of glitter glue.

diane said...

You realize you just totally let the cat out of the bag. All of those crushed hearts, crying over the giraffe cards they've been saving for all these years. Shame on you.

raf said...

..or perhaps, somebody who got pigs and giraffe, was so naively happy to have received a card..but now they realize their meaning...
...are you, by any chanse, a psychologist, trying to get more customers?
Anyway, I'm happy I didn't grew up in Usa!!

~E said...

All I wanna know is, if I was in your third grade class would I have gotten the cross-eyed giraffe? or the Pretty pink bunny rabbit?

Fancy Schmancy said...

Damn, I hated boys like you in grade school! Good thing you've grown up since then!