Here are some sitcoms that I wouldn't even spend 5 seconds to stop and make fun if I passed them on the dial. Although a few will never see the light of day so I'm safe.
As you may know I LOVE lookalikes. And in the sub category are celebrity impersonators. And for me the more they don't look like the person the better. Remember the Meatloaf impersonator I blogged about a while ago? Here are some more:
My favorite show ever. Strangers with Candy. Look at this compilation of God damn it!
And the famous Eat the brisket scene with Stu the meat man.
And here's a compilation of Noblet and food.
One of my favorite comedy series I have on DVD that I can watch over and over is the Ben Stiller Show. Have you seen it?? Check this sketch out:
..and Andy Dick has a great podcast if you didn't know. It's on itunes. Check it out.
This might be my favorite SCTV sketch of all time. Except Sammy Maudlin didn't do his classic laugh in this one where bangs his hands in between his thighs.
And I miss my man John Candy.
I was just looking for Don Rickles stuff on Youtube and came across this Dean Martin roast of Foster Brooks roasting Don Rickles. Oh my God I was tearing up laughing.
What do you think?
I think I wrote about my relationship number dating theory. It's this: You rarely see more than a 4 point difference in the looks department of people. Meaning if you're a 4, you probably won't be dating a 9.
There are exceptions. If the dude is really rich. Or maybe SUPER charismatic. Or if the dude is kinda of mental. And maybe if he's really religious. But lets face it. Do you ever see more than a 4 point difference?
(SPOILER ALERT)
And I was reminded of this when I saw trailer for The Sitter. I saw the movie a few weeks ago. Pretty funny. But a still heavy Jonah Hill ends up with Kylie Bunbury. He's a 2 and she's a 9.5. Sooooooo unbelievable! And I hope it doesn't come off as shallow but you would never see this in real life. And it makes even less sense given the context of the movie.
And actors do this all the time. Hear this Adam Sandler? You and Kate Beckinsale? I don't think so. Even though that one made more sense than this.
And below is the picture of Kylie Bunbury. You be the judge.
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Oh my God my brother just told me about this show called Mr G! I've got to see this!!
HAHAHA!!! Check out this Trailer for the 3 Stooges movie by the Farrelly brothers! Coming soon. And my favorite stooge Larry looks hysterical. He's played by that dude from Will and Grace.
I saw the trailer in the theater and totally guffawed over it. What do you think?
When I was a kid we'd visit my cousin's about three times a year. My father and his sister didn't get along. That's why it was so infrequent. And that was fine with me. Because even though they were nice. They were total nerds. And it was always a really uncomfortable visit. Kind of like, "You kids are the same age. You must have things in common. Go hang out together for three hours."
I remember going over once in about 5th or 6th grade and as as soon as I walked in the door the two cousins that were my age were like, "Jimmy! You've got to hear this record!!"
So we went upstairs and they were so excited running up, "This is the funniest thing you ever heard! Wait till you hear this!" I knew there was no way it could be.
And they proceeded to put on "Mr Jaws" by Dickie Goodman. It's supposed to be funny. And they sat there and stared at me in anticipation. So excited. Waiting for me to laugh.
And I sat there stonefaced. Uncomfortable. Knowing this was one of the stupidest things ever. And then they started mimicing it as it was playing. I remember being so uncomfortable so I pretended to laugh at parts. But I've always been bad at that. Especially when something is SO not funny. And I STILL hate when people do that. They'll say, "Bill, tell that hysterical story you were telling me." And depending on who is telling it I can tell right away it's going to be a snoozefest.
And they were all, "WAIT..LISTEN TO THIS PART!! '..with me is the local sheriff. Sheriff? What do you intend to do?'"
And then they'd look at me. Then when it was over they would crack up and say, "DO YOU BELIEVE THAT!! We gotta hear that again!!!" And they put it on again. And again. And yes....even again. Here is the nightmare:
A few random things about movies:
- I saw Final Destination 5. It was OK as expected but the special effects were unreal. Especially at the beginning when the bridge collapses. Great death scenes. I couldn't watch the scene where the chick goes to the eye doctor though because it skeeved me out too much.
- Watched Scary Movie 2 again on TV and it's still got some really funny parts. Every scene with Chris Elliot is hysterical. With his little hand. And he tries to touch everyone's face with his itty bitty hand? See picture above.
- For some reason I watched most of Backdraft on TV the other day. Oh brother what a piece of melodramatic crap. The most laughable being Billy Baldwin's character saying to Kurt Russell's character in the ambulance: "Hold on. Hold on you son of a bitch!" (when he thinks he's about to die)
- Rise of the Planet of the Apes - Holy crap did anyone see this?? The movie overall isn't great but the special effects on the apes is great! Oh my God.
So there you go.
Yes. I know how to read. I’ve been reading a lot lately as a matter of fact. And one book I’d like to recommend is “I Killed: Top Stories of the Road from America’s Top Comics.”*
It’s basically stand-ups telling their favorite stories from traveling around the country doing comedy. Some of the stories are hysterical.
- Taking a dump in the comedy condo pool.
- Two comedians picked up a drunk chick and had sex with her. They realized the next day she wasn’t drunk. She was actually retarded. Whoops.
- One comedian picked up a chick and brought her back to her apartment. She wanted to be tied up so he did. Then he had to run to his car and get something but when he came back he forgot which apartment she was in. Haha. Guess who is was? Jay Leno! Do you believe that??
Many of the stories are about the nightmares of doing stand-up. Like bombing.
My worst nightmare when I did stand-up was when a fellow comic friend of mine started booking shows. So he booked a show at a college bar near Drexel University in Philly. The problem was that it was the day before Spring break so everyone was out to just party. They had no idea that a comedy show was supposed to even happen so it was like, “Attention everyone. The show is about to start. Hello? Could everyone please keep it down? The show is about to start.”
Oh. And the microphone wasn’t really working so only people five feet away could hear. Everyone was just standing around in groups talking. Drunk. Except five college frat douche bags that pulled chairs up to the front of the stage and as I walked out just started yelling, “You suck. You’re not funny. Nobody is listening.”
Literally the only people that could hear were these five guys. So I was like F this noise and left the stage. The dude booking it was like, “What are you doing? You can’t just walk off stage.”
I was like, “Fuck you Steve. Keep the $20.”
What a joke.
*If you’re local you can check it out of the Chester County Library.
A few movies I've seen in order of worst to best.
The Hangover 2 - Terrible. What a rip off of the first. I want my money back. And Mike Tyson singing was the most unwatchable thing I've seen on film all year.
Bad Teacher - Some laughs. One of those movies that you'll stop and watch once it's on TV and you're flipping around. And how did Jason Segel start to get all these roles? He's kind of hard to look at. Am I wrong?
Green Lantern - Do you think I actually would sit through this movie that looks like a video game? From what I saw from the trailer? The special effects look too fake. Noooo friggin' thank you!
Horrible Bosses - Some pretty good laughs. Not great but pretty good. And I never thought Jennifer Aniston was hot but she's SUPER hot in this. I think it was the slutty eye makeup.
Super 8 - I really liked this. It felt like an old time Spielberg movie. And I like that it took place in the 70's.
Bridesmaids - Really funny. And I predict that Kristen Wiig (see picture above) is going to be in a lot of movies because of this. She super adorable. Nothing like a really funny cute girl. So rare.
So did you guys see any of these? And has 2011 been bad for movies or what?
I used to love SCTV. Here's a clip from SCTV. It's the show Half Wits. It's a bit long but hysterical. I always thought SCTV was better then the Early SNLs. There are a few good books on SCTV. I forget what they're called so just ask your librarian.
Now lets take a look at this clip. I just love the facial expressions on all of the contestants as they're trying to think of the answers.
And look at John Candy's hair and Joe Flaherty's nose. HAHAHAHA!!
Dummies.
Who DOESN'T check Youtube at least once a day to see what videos related to the Patty Duke Show have been added?
Come on....don't lie.
Here's a random one I just found. It's kind of funny.
One of my terrible impressions from back in the day was Ethel Murman*. Well, it wasn't that bad but.. If the impression was not great I'd say it was "in the works" - as if I was practicing it at home for hours in a mirror to get it right. Slowly I would make a breakthrough and look in the mirror with the smile that said, "Nailed it!".
So I was just on the old Youtube and found one of my favorite clips from Airplane. This always makes me laugh out loud.
*And how did anyone ever think she was a good singer? She's sounds like someone's Aunt just belting out some songs after a few Rob Roys.
Before there was Austin Powers there was The Incomparable Jackie Rogers Junior from SCTV. Here's a video that someone put together with his great performances.
Were any of you fans? Hmmm?
Seriously. You need to sit through this. Or fast forward to the 7 minute part.
Has everyone seen the side splitter Waiting for Guffman? It's in my top 5 funniest movies of all time. If you haven't seen it, drop what you're doing and got get it and watch it.
I'll wait.... Hurry up though!
SEE! I told you it was great! Remember this part? (from 5 minutes ago when you just watched it?)
Share with me what YOUR favorite part of the movie was in the comments area below. Won't you?
And to read some of the classic quote from the movie, clicky here.
