There aren't many things that strangers can do put me into kill mode. But the other week when I was at the library, I heard the most annoying sound known to humans. That noise is a woman sucking and rattling a God damned Halls Cough Drop around in her mouth while breathing loudly through her mouth like Lisa Loopner. And she switches the Halls from side to side and sucks on it every few seconds so she can swallow it's healing juices!
There aren't many things that bother me to the point that makes me want to smash the person in the face!
Why Oh Mighty and Powerful Jesus do you not give me the strength to grab this woman by the ears and tell her she's got 3 seconds to get out of my sight? Do I need to call on Beelzebub to give me the strength and guidance? You know that a few years ago when a car picked me up at 5 in the morning for the airport there was an old lady in the car doing the same thing with a Halls. For the entire trip to the Philly Airport. Remember that time?? Are you testing me Mr. Jesus?
How does a grown woman not know she's making a huge racket like this? Does she not see I keep looking at her to give her the signal to stop? That's it. Just reliving it is making me so mad that I need to go find someone to punch!
"HEY YOU...COME HERE! YEAH YOU!..STOP RUNNING!"
*One time in college I was in a class and I was picking my fingernail - I swear it was barely audible - and this chick next to me with all her rage said, "WILL. YOU. PLEASE . STOP. DOING. THAT!?" Frickin' psycho but I wish I had her courage. Instead - I am like the Cowardly Lion before receiving his fancy courage degree from the Wizard.