Who Would YOU Like to Have Drinks With? Geri Jewell. David Doyle.Facts of Life.

Imagine if I could arrange a night of drinks with you and a washed up annoying celebrity. And before you get excited YOU'RE paying. Would that "celebrity" be.....

Geri Jewell (the one on the left) from The Facts of Life? (note how she doesn't know where the camera is. Also, a little support I think is needed in the chestal area)

Your second choice is David Doyle from Charlie's Angels. Remember, you'll have to listen to that voice of his while trying not to stare at his mole.

And lastly, this chick from the show Alice. I forget her name right now. Probably because I couldn't stand that show. Except I always found it funny that people thought the catchphrase, "Mel, Kiss My Grits" was funny. So edgy.

And once you pick your celebrity please feel free to tell me what types of questions you would ask them. And other important details. Perhaps you would present Geri Jewell with some cerebral palsy jokes that she could use in her act like, "I'm looking for a fwend named Wattle and Woll so we can be like a Bill Haley and the Comets song. Shake, Wattle and Woll. I'll be Shake. Get it?"*

OK tell me that joke is not as good or better than one of her jokes. Hmmm? Hmmm?

*When presenting this "joke" to Geri it's important to tell it while standing up. Then, once you deliver the killer punch line you have to smile with satisfaction and wait for laughter. You may be waiting for a bit but....+

TMZ Makes Me Sick. Harvey Levin Is An A-Hole. Amanda Bynes.

Harvey Levin from TMZ is such a piece of Sh#t.

OK. I admit that I have the TMZ app on my phone but still. I hate him mostly for how he stalks celebrities. There was just a story where they posted multiple photos of Amanda Bynes smoking pot in her car. They posted over forty pictures from various locations. So they were actually secretly trailing her then taking photos of the inside of the car when she would get out and go to a store or the gym.

Shouldn't this be illegal? And look Harry's dumbass smile. You smug creep. And he chews on that stupid water bottle all the time. Oh. And Harvey? The narration that you have on your show is not funny. It's retarded.

And in other celebrity watching annoyance news can't there be a site that just has stories of legitimate non-gossipy entertainment news? Like showing movies sets, interviewing directors, etc.

Do people really give a crap about every move the Kardasians make? Or who is going to be the next judge on a stupid show? Or photos of every celebrity baby and kid? THAT should totally be illegal. Someone in LA should start a site that posts unflattering pictures of paparazzi and their kids. How about that?

And in celebrity baby news if I ever get really famous I'm going to fake that my lover is having a baby. Then when my spawn is finally revealed I'm going to show a picture of the most horrifying ugly baby the earth has ever seen. Phantom of the Opera face. Big ole hunch on it's back. Goiter. The works.

That'll show em'!

Now enjoy this sexy picture of Amanda Bynes. (Who I also think is super talented).

Do You Want To Know What I Look LIke? Lookalikes.

I love finding lookalikes for people I know. The best is when I find a lookalike and there IS a resemblance but it’s a total insult.

My friend Flare and I have always cracked up when we’d see lookalikes of each other. We’d be at Exton Mall back in the day and if he saw a lookalike of me he would go up to the person, look really confused and look back and forth at me and the lookalike and say, “Wait….Zibbs, is this you…or is…what the…wait a minute...” The person would have no idea and would just look all nervous and walk faster to get away.

Then when I’d point out a lookalike of Flare, he would actually go up to the person, and put his hands up mime style or begin to comb his hair. Then he would say, “Oh my God I’m sorry, I thought this was a mirror.”

I even have a scrapbook I started years ago called, “The lookalike file.” When I see a lookalike of someone I know I clip it and put it in the old lookalike file. The best is when the reaction to a lookalike is cracking up then the person says, “Oh my God you’re mean.” Whatcha gonna do?

Well on the subject of lookalikes, here are some people I’ve been told I look like:

Errol Flynn – My aunts used to tell me that all the time. I’ll take that though. Good looking chap.


Eminen – This one is complete bull. Someone from Twitter said I look like him. I think it’s because of how my hair looked one day.


The adult Chistopher Night aka Peter Brady – Some chick told me this recently. She did say, “But I mean that in a good way. He’s a good looking man.” So I got that.


Dan Marino – Some photographer at a photo shoot told me this once. He was like, “You look just like him.” First and last time I heard that. I guess I do kind of see it on this one.


Weird Al – This was because of my cheesy mustache in college. Total insult.


Napoleon Dynamite – My oldest sister said “that’s you in 8th grade.” Hmm. Well I do think I had a suit like that. Except I never danced with a girl in 8th grade at a dance. I was too busy holding the wall up.


And someone recently said a combo of The Hoff and Anthony Bourdain. Kind of insulted by the Anthony Bourdain since he's way older but whatever.

So who have you been told you look like? Come on…don’t be

Dr Zibbs Interview By Enough Hat For Everyone.

To read a great interview that Kristen did with me, click here. I especially like the interviewers notes.

Also, you should really follow Enough Hats for Everyone when you're over there. She's got a great blog. It's TBY endorsed!

Twitter Followers. Paul F Tompkins, Ted Leo, James Urbaniak and MORE!

Here's an update of the celebrities that follow me on Twitter. As you may know, I have my famous @DrZibbs Tweets and my famous @FatherKelly tweets. Ready? And go...

Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman - We then sent a few DM's back and forth . She said I was funny (jumps in air and yells, "She thinks I'm funny!" like Rudolph yelling, "She likes me!").

Christina Applegate - mentioned me twice. I've sent her a few DM's (direct messages) but she hasn't responded. Something is probably wrong with her computer. But then one of you a-holes sent me an email saying it was her. OK who was it? Because whoever it was, you really did your research. Nice try. Seriously, who was it? Was it you? What about you?..

Lisa Jane Persky (@lisajanepersky) - actress.

Nina Bargiel (@SlackMistress) TV Writer: Lizzie McGuiere and other stuff.

AnneMurray - Grammy award winning singer. She follows Dr Zibbs and Father Kelly. We've DM'd each other and she's communicated with me via tweets. She said she'd come to the West Chester Christmas Parade and do a duet with me next year. She probably wasn't joking. I put a note in my tickler file to remind me to contact her next November. Keep your fingers crossed.

Dawn Langstroth @DawnLangstroth daughter of Anne Murray . Click on her name to see how hot she is. She was the one that told Anne Murray to follow me. I wonder of the two of them read my tweets at family gatherings. And it's probably become a nice tradition. The Kennedy's played football, The Murrays/Langstroths read my Tweets.

Caissie St Onge @Caissie - Write/Producer of Best Week ever. We Dm's and emailed each other. She also worked on the Letterman Show. Nice.

James Urbaniak @JamesUrbaniak - Actor in various movies including playing R Crumb in American Splendor. Currently does the voice of Dr Venture on The Venture Brothers. I asked him to DM Paul F Tompkins and tell hom to follow me. Which he did.

Paul F Tompkins @PFTompkins - Comedian and actor. I actually know him from when I used to do stand up but I'm glad he's following me. He follows Dr Zibbs and Father Kelly. If you ever get a chance to see his stand up act, check it out. He's hysterical. Or you can buy his new CD - Freak Wharf. It just came out last week.

Ted Leo @Tedleo - Rocker from Ted Leo and the Pharmacists.

Michael Faustino ( @MichaelFaustino ) - He's the brother of David Faustino from Married With Children and was on a few episodes. I'm hoping he gets his brother to follow me. Then I'll only have two people left and I'll have the whole family of Married with Children. It's like playing Twitter Monopoly.

And guess who STOPPED following me? Yup. Chris Daughtry's wife. She must have issues. I don't know.

And that's about it for now. And I'll leave you with this tweet that I actually thought of in a dream last night. I swear to God. Here goes...

"Product Idea: Pants that have printed arrows pointing to the groinage area and the words, 'Doesn't have a boner' - so when you DO have a real boner, people might just think it's a joke."

It's probably over 140 characters but who cares.

Twitter Tweet Up In West Chester Tonight. Chester County. Thanksgiving Eve.

So there is a Twitter Tweet-Up tonight in West Chester at Barnabys. 5:30 until whenever.

Can you imagine the excitement of the attendees? Because they get to meet me? I wonder if they even slept last night. Do you think? Probably not. Here are a few guidelines that I'll be printing on flyers for my adoring fans. Take a few minutes to memorize them before entering the lair* that I'm sure is being built for me as we speak:

- Always remember, when in conversation with me, I like to dictate the tone and pace.

- When listening to one of my hilarious tales, you may think of something that YOU want to add. That is fine. If time allows. (You may want to jot a quick note so you don't forget what your "interesting" story is). If you think the story isn't that interesting, rehearse it with a friend or member of the clergy in the bathroom. Ask them to be honest with you as to whether they think it's something I would want to listen to.

- On first approach, don't look me directly in the eye.

- If you have a gift to present to me, make sure to flaunt it to the others before giving it to me. It will give them a chance to run out and get me a gift so they don't look like a fools.

-Please, no photography. As I've stated before, I will allow charcoal sketches of me and construction paper art as long as the glitter is used at a minimum. There will be scales available for the weight of your glitter. I think it's two ounces. Ask one of my handlers if you don't know how to weigh things. They'll be happy to help.

- But most of all, enjoy yourself.

And speaking of meeting strangers that you only have talked to online, here's a post detailing the account of when I met a few West Chester bloggers. Maybe you know them? To read the story of that classic night last year, click here.

*I hope it has a Roman feel with a dash of 1976. And if I see one piece of tape holding up the streamers I'm out of there. Remember, nothing tacky!

Ask Dr Zibbs. What Would YOU Like To Know? West Chester Blogger.

I've granted interviews in the past. I will now like to answer some more individual questions that YOU the reader would like to know.

What do you want to know about ME?

Do you need some advice?

Do you want my opinion on something in your life?

Of course you do. Here's what to do. Send me an email with "DR ZIBBS QUESTION" in the subject line. If you want a link to your blog, make sure to leave your blog name in the subject area of the email. My email address is Lebner1 at Yahoo Dot Com (see what I did there so the bots don't pick it up?)

Now I'm not saying I'm going to answer all of the questions so please don't phone your family just yet. Just hold your horses and see what happens.

I'll post the answers in a few days.

Father Kelly and My Christina Applegate Connection. Twitter.

So as I mentioned last week, Sarah Silverman is following my Father Kelly character on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/FatherKelly

So the drama continues. On Friday, I noticed that I was getting a few followers every minute. I couldn't figure it out until someone DM's me and told me that Chistina Applegate (AKA @1capplegate) mentioned me on Twitter. She said:

#followfriday umm seriously funny @fatherkelly to any of my catholic followers, please do not take offense. all in good fun

Pretty cool huh? And she only follows 45 people. I look though her feed and she's mentioned Sarah Silverman so I think she found me on the list of who Sarah Silverman is following.

Then, to add the icing on the cake, I get a message from someone at Paste magazine saying I was listed in an article titled, "The Top 10 Unique, Funny or Usefull Twitter Users You Should Follow Right Now". They wrote,

5. Father Kelly - FatherKelly
In which someone in Chester County, Pa. pretends to be a Catholic priest to make religion-themed jokes.
Unique, Funny or Useful: Funny
Best Recent Tweet: A Carnie asked me to bless him. I panicked and said "Uhh..let me go get my magic wand". Then I avoided him.
Runner Up: This is BULLSHIT! I wasn't LEARING at Sister Anne while she was eating that banana! I just happened to be in stare mode!
Extra Credit: The CCD nerds gave me some "art" made from dry macaroni and yarn. Helloooo trashcan.

(To read the entire article, click: here )The weird thing is, I've had my blog since 2006 and no famous people read it (except for this person). Just you guys. I start Twitter with the Father Kelly character and I get two famous people reading it and a magazine mention. What gives?

So who would like to guess what's going to happen next?

(Please don't say "nothing").

And I know it's a bit premature, but once I get 20 famous people reading my Tweets I'm going to have a big party with them and...are you ready for this?...With 20 of you!

So please let me know what YOU can add to the party if I invite you. I will also tell you up front that you might also have to share with the catering duties. It depends how much the party costs.

I'm Famous! Kind of..Breaking News! Sarah Silverman and Twitter.

OK. Hold on and try not to get too excited.

What do the following people have in common:

John Stamos
Blues Traveler
Dave Attell
Judd Apatow
Larry David
And ME have in common?

These people are all being followed by Sarah Silverman on Twitter. It's true. The alter ego that I made up last week on twitter called @FatherKelly is being followed by @SarahKSilverman. And she only follows 116 people.

Don't believe me? Go to my page on twitter here:
http://twitter.com/FatherKelly

I want everyone to know that since I'm probably going to get a call to move to Hollywood soon, I'm not going to forget you people. Well, I won't be able to take your calls or anything because of my new status but I will occasionally skim your blogs.

See you in Hollywood chumps.

..I mean chums

Hot Blogger Dedicates Nude Pic to Me...Another Hot Blogger.

It's so very touching* when a hot blogger takes a nude picture and dedicates it to me.

I'm challenging more of you to do the same (sorry - no dudes). Come on. Live a little. To view the picture in all it's beauty click the words: Ladybug Graveyard.

*Get it - touching? Touching like you're "touching" someone that's nude. Yeah...you get it.

Blogger Friend Opens Big Mouth And Beans Get Spilled. Contest.

I specifically told my friend "Ring Ding" not to tell anyone about my blog. Does he listen?

No. He just couldn't resist.

So last weekend he says to two people that I know, "So did you know 'Dr Zibbs' has a blog?"

They ask, "Really, what's it about?"

Then I had the odd task of trying to describe it. Which is pretty difficult if you think about it.

It's like trying to describe the smell of a rose to a guy that doesn't live near roses.

So how would you describe my blog? The person who can best describe TBY will get it read by me on my Snapvine recorder (located conveniently on my sidebar). Yes this is a contest. So get to work.

And as you write it, feel free to write it in a way as if it's "coming to a theater near you" because that's how I'll probably record your creation when I'm in the studio "cutting it" (sorry for all the technical talk people- that's just how we in the biz talk).

..you see, "cutting it" means, "laying down the tracks" or...oh never mind....it's very hard to explain. I guess in the most simplest terms, I'll be recording your words from my mouth into a recording device that will later be able to be heard by your ears.

Do you understand now?

If I'm On The Radio Would Anyone Want To Ask Me Questions?

So the other night I ran into a radio personality that reads my blog. He knows my secret identity through a friend.

He never comments for some reason but he reads it. Of course he asked, "Are you really like that Dr Zibbs character?"

"Character". Oh that was rich.

Anyways, me being all famous and shit, he said he thought it might be interesting to interview me on his morning radio show. I said I would do it but now I'm debating it. Would anyone want to call in and ask me questions if I do it? Or you could call in and tell everyone how much you love my blog. I don't know.

The show is streamed on the world wide web of the Internet so you'd be able to hear it. My media domination plan has been: Blog to Twitter to TV shows to Movies but maybe the radio thing would be a nice stepping stone to the TV show gig*. I'm not sure.

So I'm just testing the waters here to see if there would be any interest in you (the reader) calling in to ask me questions if the station meets my elaborate demands and I decide to do it.

*Uh..does anyone know anyone who works in the TV industry? If so, please print out my entire blog(500 plus pages), and write "Resume" on the top and give it to them.

Questions About People That Stand Outside of Today Show In NYC. Al Roker.

Just a few questions about the retards that stand outside of the Today Show with their signs:

- Do they make their signs before traveling? And roll them up and consider it carry on? Holding it like precious gold the entire way?

- Or perhaps the first stop they make in New York is to a drugstore so they can pick up sign making supplies.

- Do some of the signs have even worse sayings on the back and even crappier handwriting because it was their first draft?

- For years to come, do they tell tell the story of how their sign made it onto The Today Show for 3 seconds and Al Roker almost made a comment about it until he saw the "Super Moms from Michigan" sign.

And lastly, do these people have any idea that there's much more interesting things to do in New York?

Hobo Blog Song Has Everyone Talking. Composer Contest.

For readers of my blog that check out the comments and the Twitter comments - they were treated to a little gem yesterday. It was a That Blue Yak theme song recorded by me. It was a local hobo that happened to be singing the praises of my blog. It's right over there on the sidebar. Click play on the Snapvine recorder.

In case you want to sing along, here are the lyrics:

That Blue Yak is the best blog in the land
It will take your heart and then take you by your hand.
You can read it at home or you can read it at worky
But if you read it you will not be a jive turkey
Because That Blue Yak is the Greatest blog in the land. (yes it is)

(Part 2)

Some of the blogs are totally gay
But not That Blue Yak it will get you every single day
From the city slickers to the hillbillie hicks
Dr Zibbs blog is followed by many dudes and chicks

Because That Blue Yak is the Greatest Blog in the Land.
(It's the greatest blog in the fuckin' land)

Note how the hobo is a blog reader because it's kind of sung to the tune of Eight Is Enough. Which I just blogged about.

Well here's the great part. If you leave a verse in the comments section I'm going to go back to the hobo and his friends and ask them to sing YOUR SONG. Now I'll probably only have the top two songs done because you know how hobos can be with their music. But give it a shot.

It will be something that you can record and proudly give to your grandchildren someday.

Here's A Dynomite Website About Who's Gettin' It On

Jimmy JJ Walker dated Ann Coulter? Yup. According to the website that you'll be wasting your morning on. The site is whosdatedwho.com. On the site you can click on names and see who they're linked to. Here are just a few discoveries:

Ally Sheedy and Richie Sambora...what?

Janis Joplin and Robert Plant....Holy cow!

Linda Pearl and Desi Arnaz, Jr......Well.I.Never!

Dr Zibbs and Charlotte Rae....in her dreams!

Note that there are codes on the site: R= Relationship, O=Onscreen romance etc.

If you see any good connections, leave them in the comments section.

Bloggers Have Real Life Meeting With Dr Zibbs

Dreams were fulfilled on Sunday as two bloggers met me. In person. That's right. In real life. Here's how it went down:

Blogger: John Young

Blog: Tikaro

Background: John's blog won Best of the Mainline this year. In addition to John's blog, he also does some really cool stuff like the Guerilla Drive-In, where he plays movies from a 16mm projector from the side car of his 1977 BMW bike. He's also invented various techie things including some 3rd party Apple Iphone items.

The meetup: I knew he was going to be at the chili fest because he was providing these cool bar coded interactive tattoos. Mary Bigham from WCDish introduced us and he was a really nice guy. He's commented on TBY and I talked to him for a few minutes. It was the first time that someone introduced me as "Dr Zibbs." He's a really great guy with lots of cool, unique ideas.

Blogger: Anonymous

Blog: Anonymous And Loving It

Background: Anonymous started his blog at the end of August. He had been commenting on TBY and some other blogs and after encouraged by Falwless (then me), decided to start a blog. As it turns out, Anonymous is Robert Henson from the now out of business WCOJ. If you're not from Chester County, then you don't know that he's a local celebrity. He also has a podcast with thousands of listeners. He's interviewed many famous people.

The meetup: He outed himself in the comments section of this TBY post so I knew who he was. So I approached him, tapped him on the shoulder and asked,

"Are you Robert Henson?"

"Depends who's asking."

"Dr Zibbs."

"DR ZIBBS! HOW ARE YOU DOING?"

Me being a really, really, really big deal in the blogosphere, I wasn't sure if he was going to want kiss my ring - you know, like they do with the Pope - so I put my hands in my pockets. I tried to put his mind at ease. Hey. I put my pants on like everyone else. One leg at a time (unless I'm sitting on my bed).

We then hung out for a while talking about various things. It was pretty cool meeting someone in real life that has been a TBY reader. And although he's the professional interviewer, I think I did a pretty good job of steering the conversation back to me and my blog as often as I could.

Anyways, it was great meeting both of these bloggers in real life and I hope to keep in touch with them.

Who's going to meet me next? You? ....You....or what about....YOU?

What Famous People Have You Met? Here's My List

You'd think that being famous myself - it wouldn't be that big of a deal that I've had interactions with other famous people. It's really nothing to me, but for some of the reader's that are nobodies - you kind of like to live vicariously through me. You know who you are. Celebs I've met (part 1) here goes:

- Gorilla Monsoon (all star wrestler) - Got into a wrestling match in New Jersey by following him in the side door. Told bouncers - we're with the Gorilla. They bought it.

- Steven Wright (comedian) - Met him when I was doing stand-up comedy in the late 80's. Made him laugh from the stage. The club was the comedy works in Philly.

- Sally Jessie Raphael *- met and spoke with at ABC dinner. She hugged me. Smells like you think she would.

- Winnie and Kevin Arnold's brother (from Wonder Years)* - Met them at the an ABC event in Philly at the Museum of Natural Science. She was cute. He was short and dopey but had a 6 foot girlfriend that looked like a model. He told me he had some "projects" he was working on. I knew his days were numbered.

- The guy that was in a dance competition against the Fonz on Happy Days -recognized him at a bar that used to be in Exton called the First Edition. I approached him.

- Lisa Robertson (QVC host) - Saw her a few times when I was at meetings at QVC. Then, since she also lives in West Chester, I've run into her at the Exton Mall, Wawa and other locations. She says hi because I think she thinks she knows me. I'm trying to get up the nerve to say, "So Lisa, what about that thing we were talking about last time? What's goin' on with that thing?" - Just to see what she says . She's HOT.

- The kid that was on the first episode of Cheers before the first commercial starts. He was also on a short lived sitcom where he was a teenager and Ann Jillian was a ghost - recognized him at a club. I approached him and he seemed kind of thrilled that ANYONE recognized him.

- The red headed girl with curly hair from Head of the Class* - met her at ABC TV function. Had some drinks with her. She was pretty cool.

- Amy Steele (actress from Friday the 13th and she was Alex P. Keaton's first boink) - She was the sister of a guy I went to Henderson High School with. When I met her the Bar Restaurant in West Chester, I lied and told her I just got a call back from Wrigley's Gum for a commercial. She was interested to hear about the details and I was too embarrassed to tell her I was just kidding so I made a bunch of stuff up.

- Captain and Mrs Noah (Philly 70's TV celebs) -met at ABC function. Very grandfatherly.

- Chief Halftown (Philly 70's TV celebs) - He was in teepee at Dorney Amusement Park. It was kind of sad.

- John Heinz - (dead PA senator and heir to Heinz fortune) - shook his hand at Exton Mall when I was in 5th grade. He died in a helicopter crash 16 years later. Coincidence?

What celebs have YOU met? Leave in comments area of my blog. Don't even think about lying either.

*(picture to follow - once I find them)

January 8 Birthdays and Deathdays

In addition to several members of That Blue Yak's team , January 8 is also the birthday of these famous people:

Calhoun (1970) - Hostess loving West Chester resident. Skills: Talking about refinishing chairs.

Elvis (1935)- the King

Jesse Garon (1935)- Elvis's showboating twin brother. Killed in the womb by a powerful karate chop from his brother.

Stephen Hawking (1942) - Robot talking physicist.

Soupy Sales (1926) - Comedian. Claims to have thrown 19,000 pies over the years.

Shirley Bassey (1937) - Singer of the James Bond song "Goldfinger".

David Bowie (1947) - Cross dressing singer. Teeth have magically repaired themselves over time.

Graham Chapman (1941) - Monty Python member. Was in the Parrot Sketch. Read the Memorial Speech read by John Cleese at his funeral here.

William Diemer (1905) - Invented bubble gum. Died toothless.

Bob Eubanks (1937) - The Newlywed Game Host and snappy dresser. Best line on the show:

Eubanks (to contestant): Where is the most unusual place you've ever made whoopie?

Contestant: (ponders) ...That would be up the butt Bob?

Bill Graham (1931) - Music promoter.

R. Kelly (1967) - Sung "I believe I Can Fly". Likes to pee on people.

Roy Kinnear (1934) - Played Henry Salt in Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Best line: "OK Wonka, how much for one of those Oompa Loompa's?" (Even though we all know that the sale of dwarfs was legal in all but three countries in the seventies).

Robby Krieger - Guitarist for the doors. Did you know his hair is actually made from real steel wool?

Charles Osgood (1933) - Bow Tie wearing CBS news guy.

Bart Starr (1934) - Green Bay Packers Quarterback. Good thrower.

Larry Storch (1923) - Corporal Agarn on F Troop.

Xzibit - Rapper. First hit was the beautiful love song, "Bitch Please" with Snoop Dogg.

And the following are people who selfishly died on January 8th:

Galileo (died 1942) - Astronomer.

Fancois Mitterand (died 1996) - French President. Rest in peace jerk.

Matthew "Stymie" Beard (died 1981) - Stymie on Our Gang. Not only could that kid wear a derby, he was smart enough to keep it secured with the strap.

Marco Polo (died 1324) -Explorer. Not only famous for the famous pool game named in his honor, he also was the first to perform the cannonball.

Dave Thomas (died 2002) - Founder of Wendy's. Maker of delicious, diarrhea inducing food.

And on that note, I'm thinks it's about time to treat myself to a double, large fries and a frosty.