Monday, July 28, 2008

West Chester Blogger Caption Contest Winner Honored

Greetings from West Chester folks and thanks to all for entering my first "Caption Contest" (see picture below). Nobody got the obvious which was, "If you love something set it free. If it comes back, it is yours. If it doesn't, it was never meant to be."

The 1st place trophy however goes to Rider from Rider's Block who wrote, "While Polly blew him, Joshua thought of all the angels watching. And his dead mom".

Let's break things down people and take a look at what he did here. Deconstruct it if you will. Firstly, I like the construction of the sentence overall. Also, as far as I can tell, no grammatical or spelling errors. Off to a good start.

It started with the name "Polly" which draws you in right away. Is it a pirate's tale? Does it have something to do with crackers?

Then he starts telling us that "Polly blew him!" Hold on there big fella! Things are turning sexy on us here.

I was feeling a bit hot at this point with all of the dirty talk. I couldn't get the music out of my head that sounded like sexy music. You know, like some of the African American artists from the 1970's used to play. They called it Funky music. So I stopped reading and thought I'd come back later after the rythmic beat and hot steamy feelings cooled down a bit.

After a nice cold compress that our staff nurse so kindly administered on me, I returned to the tome and Rider starts blabbin' about "Joshua..and angels!" Oh great. He's gonna be turning all religious on us. I bet he's even gonna try to hit us up for a donation for his church or something. Or more sneakily, he'll ask for a "pledge". Get lost jerk!

Just as I was about to stop reading, I moved onto act 3. You've got to remember, I'm a very, very slow reader and -when Rider writes, I like to savor every second like a delicious lolly. That's when he turns things around. This SOB hits us up with a real zinger with the line, "And his dead Mom". Can you imagine that!!??!!

That's when I found our winner. To all the losers, take your time on the next contest. Consider writing a few rough drafts like Rider actually did. Tape all of the drafts to the wall, then take down the one's that don't make the cut. If you know it's no good, don't waste our time. Sit back and shamefully watch as others post their potential winning comments. There are many other things you can do to feel a part of this blog.
Rider, please leave your acceptance speech in the comments area as well as any tips that you may have for the readers.


MJenks said...

Beginning a sentence with a conjunction is a huge, glaring grammatical error.

Just sayin'.

Falwless said...

Talk about a sore loser! Sheesh, mjenks!

I will try harder next time.

Falwless said...

Meaning, I will try next time.

MJenks said...

It's not that I'm a sore loser--I'm quite happy for Rider or whatever the hell his true identity might be. If Zibbs wants to be king of the internet, he can't be having big, egregious errors about grammar on his page.

Dr Zibbs said...

Mjenks: please never, ever use the word Egrerious on my blog or anywhere on the internet. I'm not sure what it means but it probably has something to do with monks or eggs or things that I have no use for.

Falwless said...


God you're a dummy. I effing love you.

minijonb said...

a picture is worth a thousand ROFLs


Gwen said...

Rider nailed it with that one! His trophy is well deserved.

Rider said...

Thank you. I do deserve this award. To any aspiring caption writers I offer this advice: write what you know and don't filter yourself. I can't be the only person who imagines weeping angels watching while I am serviced orally.