Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Cojo? Get The Hell Off Of My TV! Stupid Fashion Jerk!

Oh really Cojo? You think that a few accoutrements make any woman's outfit come to life in a snap? You're the authority on clothes? Then why are you wearing clothes that only a chick would wear?

(Me pushing him down steps) Who gives a crap you pumpkin faced girl! And what man has sculpted eyebrows like that? (Shoves mirror in his face) Look at yourself! Did I give you permission to speak? Shut up! If I see your stupid faux cheerful act on my TV one more time I swear to God I'm coming after you with an ax!

That is all.

38 comments:

Peggy said...

Now tells us how you really feal! LOL

Peggy said...

Oh shit...I can't believe my first comment on your blog and I couldn't even spell correctly!!!!

Tash said...

He looks...squooshy. Like a corpse left out in the sun to cook.

Reminds me, I gotta go grab lunch now.

Anonymous said...

I swear, every time I see him I'm expecting to hear a woman talking - it takes me by surprise every time!

Dr Zibbs said...

Peggy - what's speling? And thanks for stopping by my blog.

Vic said...

That's a man?? Where have I been?
I feel a little dizzy.

Chris said...

Now won't you crap your boxers tonight if someone hacks him up with an axe?

Actually, I'm not sure whether you'd be investigated or given a humanitarian award.

Verdant Earl said...

The last time I saw him on TV (my woman had the remote) he was making fun of the mannish way that Samantha Ronson dressed. Because, ya know...she's a mannish dyke.

THIS guy is making fun of gay stereotypes? He IS a freakin' gay stereotype!!!

Anonymous said...

I had NO idea that was a dude. I watch TV on the Internet because that way I can't channel-surf into this type of confusion.

Dr Zibbs said...

B.E.Earl - you're dead on. And even though I shouldn't have to defend myself on my own blog, it's not just because he is so fem that I hate him. Richard Simmons is a total fembot and I think he's hysterical. But when my wife has Entertainment Tonight on and I hear him?...I just start screaming!

Dr Zibbs said...

Oh and Chris - That comment was hilarious.

Pearl said...

Oh, I am so sorry to say that every time I see him I can't help but think how much he looks like Chastity Bono (and I have nothing against good ol' Chas).
Yeah. Someone has given this guy a job on TV and now everyone pays.
Pearl

Tenakim said...

I gave hin a break for a while cuz of some Kidney disease he was sporting, but yeah, enough is enough- puffy and platinum and more make than I think I've ever worn- and I'm not a dude(he is still a dude, right?) I think he is in'transition"- also with the small pic I saw in my reader, I thought he was Tea Leoni swollen on steroids!

Cowguy said...

So I don't watch much network television... or much tv at all for that matter, so I had to wiki the manwoman. Now I'm just confused, but I'll hate himher with you just because.

J.J. in L.A. said...

You ask 'what man?'. When did anyone say Cojo was a man? Hmm?

Personally, I think he's the spittin' image of Chastity Bono...who is also gay, btw.

Coincidence? I think not.

Son of a Thomas said...

I'm confused. That's a dude right? O.K. I've never seen him(?) But I think I liked him better with the electric Mayhem.

Morgan the Muse said...

Man, he gets scarier every time I see him. :S

H said...

Cojo and Joan Rivers...can't stand either of them. Come to think of it they kinda look alike too. Scary!

William said...

He does have some nice teeth though..yeah
Ehlk..he's so annoying. And so is that show.

Anonymous said...

At least he even has sculpted eyebrows. Mine are getting bushier by the day - I've been so busy lately that I keep forgetting to pluck!
Hmmm. Gross.

Anonymous said...

I think he definitely looks more feminine now. I knew he had kidney problems which made him gain weight. I hate when men look like women and vice versa. It's confusing.

SkylersDad said...

I saw him a long time ago, after some awards show. He was talking about the dresses, and mentioned that some hot babe had the "high beams on", holding his fingers out in front of his chest.

That is the only time I have not wanted to strangle him.

Dr Zibbs said...

William - welcome to my amazing blog.

words...words...words... said...

He makes Carson Kressley look like Steve McQueen.

Anonymous said...

Man with sculpted brows? Does Carrot Top ring a bell? Or those Gotti kids on Growing Up Gotti?

~E said...

Holy steel balls, Dr. Z! THATS A DUDE?!?!?!

I saw the pic and thought, huh...if that chic lost some weight she'd be really cute.

Tom said...

Zibbs, You are dead on with Kojo. I can't stand him and have a post saved about him but you beat me to the punch. I'm glad I'm not the only one that finds it ironic that he is giving fashion advice.

diane said...

O.k., seriously, who is this guy, and why is he wearing Carol Brady's hair?

. said...

I have no idea who he/she is..but so many teeth scare me!Brr!

Michelle said...

OK i am officially grossed out for the entire day!!!

Geez, thank you for that Dr Z!!!

He is freaky looking. I see him, yet can't look away!!!!

Love
Stalker

Gwen said...

THAT'S a dude? I've now seen it all.

MO said...

He looks alot like Sonny & Cher's daughter, Chastity!

dizzy mom said...

Usually Hollywood he/she's look hotter than me. I am proud to say I am hotter than this one! I can't stand him on TV, I can't stop asking "Why did he do that to his face?" "Is it an improvement from his old face?"

Do they have plastic surgery interventions? Maybe it's time to start.

Greta said...

Lol. Where have I been? That's a man?

Caffeine Court said...

Cojo is a fucking freak. 'Nuff said.

Oh and I clicked.

WendyB said...

LOL -- in general I think any men who comment on women's clothing should be beaten with sticks. Anyway, I bumped into Cojo very rarely when we both worked at People back in day. I definitely didn't "know" him, but I saw him. Back then he was super conscious of his weight and very very thin. Then he suffered from kidney disease and steroids and other medications have blown him up. I've always felt bad for him. It's bad enough to have a terrible disease but going from rexi-esque weight consciousness to very puffy has got to be awful.

Anonymous said...

First off, calling him a pumpkin head is just wrong. He doesn't always look like that, he is swollen. He is basically dying of polycystic kidney disease. He had his first transplant and it was rejected and now he has had a second and thank goodness is doing well. Let's see you go through a horrible disease, 2 transplants and take about 20 different kinds of anti rejection drugs a day and see how you look. Ya jerk. Are you so shallow that you can only judge people from their appearance? He has done great things to raise awareness for PKD so that people like ME don't have to suffer from it. And just what are you doing to make the world a better place? Threatening to cut up sick people with an axe. You need to be institutionalized you freaking psycho. I hope that you or noone in your family is ever stricken with a horrible disease like PKD because then you would know how painful it is when people who don't even know you think that they can laugh at you and say horribly mean things. Mat God forgive you.

Dr Zibbs said...

Anonymous - I'm sorry I've taken a year to respond to you but...Oh nevermind.